Lascivious Desire

Chapter Eighteen: Want To Feel Free

Chapter Eighteen: Want To Feel Free

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Nandini

Fucking Mine.

I inhaled sharply as my body respond with his last two words that I felt really embarrassed. It's wrong... so wrong that it feels good. It felt dangerous but yet feels pleasant for me. It's forbidden but my body approved.

I realized with the period i started to approve.... But also I don't want to accept it. But how could someone ignore his obscene handsome face? It's too hard to ignore. It's too hard to control oneself not to touch and care.

How much I deny I knew that I want to be touch by him. My body want his touch on me. I might be innocent but I am not that innocent now. I knew what is felt like to be desired by a man.

I am inexperienced but I learned and heard from the girls.

He licked my earlobe slowly, inhaling the scent of me. My body quavered with his touch, want to feel more. But not daring to say anything. I kept my words to me and feeling his touch on me.

His touch was like a lightning bolt through the dark sky which trembling your existence to the dark forbid world and yet bring you to the blue surface of desire.

So intense.

So breakable.

So sensuous.

So thespian.

It's not like he would make you undesirable instead he would make you feel special his own way to take you in high and down to the ground.

And my every sense is owned by him but yet he didn't take me. He made me vulnerable yet made me desirable. I saw his light through the darkness. He tried to hide but he couldn't. His light is too strong in his darkness that he lost his way.

I can feel that which make me attracted to him, which make me want him, which make me forget that he bought me as he referred but if he really bought me then why he is not treating me the way he treat others. He always remind me of other girls... then why he is sparing me?

I leaned back to his touch, felt his hard strong body on my back, holding me in place my knees getting weak and his torturous touch making me defenseless.

As I body started to give up my mind make me strong and telling me not to give into him. He sensed that so he traveled his one hand to my side and squeezed me.

"Vermin, why trying when your body is giving up?"

His free hand moving inside my tops, caressing my skin— building up the tension on my body. He doesn't know what is he doing to me if he knew then he wouldn't stop himself from having me. He wants to claim me but yet stopping himself.

But I want him to have me. I want to feel alive.

How ridiculous it is!

A week ago I was so desperate to escape from him and now here I am thinking to have him when I knew it means nothing to him. But I want to feel alive... I want to feel free. And however he made me feel free.

Free.

"Nandini." he hummed my name and nuzzling his nose to my shoulder.

"Hmm." I respond but not able to form a word, actually couldn't trust my voice.

"Say Yes Nandini." He started to hump his hips on my back and I can tell my cheek is looking like a cherry.

I can feel his hard groin.... It's too hard. And the scenario of stroking his c**k flashed in my mind. I tried to move away but his hold is too tight.

"Vermin, you don't know what you did to me. We could enjoy each other. And if I want I can take you here with your permission or not. But I won't as long as I want to make you mine but I won't." his hands move lower... touching my panty, caressing the wetness over the panty. He knew that I want him and no hiding. He touched once more then pulled his fingers and I almost whimpered off the lack of his touch. But I kept silent.

I turned my head to see his face, astonished by his words. A week ago he was too determined to break me and now he is being gentle is a wondered.

I know he is just lusting over me... just want to take me. Nothing more.

How could I live as a w***e?

Although he didn't called me w***e anymore but I can forget my first day here when he called me with so much nasty words. It's too hard to believe him now.

And I don't believe him nor do I trust him.

He didn't give me any reason. I looked at his eyes which is so emotionless..... No hope in there for me. Just lust and darkness. How could I trust him with my body?

But I want him. He wants me then why can't I give into him? I know I can't escape him... and if I escape then I would land up on another jerk arms. So then why not him?

At least he wants me. And he is also handsome... deliciously handsome. But I am not ready.

Not ready to give him what he wants. I know one day I will give him what he wants but not today.

He realized and step back.

I stood there frozen. Then heard a sound.

"Leave. Leave before I change my mind. I am not that generous to think twice and I would f**k you if you don't leave now. LEAVE," he growled and I opened the door and run.

I felt so rejected by him though it's my decision. He wanted me but I rejected him but his words was so hurtful. It sliced my heart. I shut the door and throw myself on the bed. Not caring that I didn't eat anything.

It's hurtful. Really hurtful. If he knew what I want then he might hurt me more.

'You are an i***t Nandini. Wanting something that you can't have.' I scold myself for my stupidity... for my stupid feelings.

Manik

Damn!

I punched the glass table. f**k this. What the hell was I thinking that she would fall for me? f**k this idiocy. How could a girl fall for her tormentor?

But you kept her thinking like that. You never revealed the truth. I told myself. I shouldn't have get close to her. I should have keep my distance and let her live like prisoner so she thinks that I am the owner and her tormentor.

But I couldn't... I couldn't f*****g keep my distance from her.

I never thought protecting someone would be that f*****g hard. I betrayed my father for saving this broken girl and bring her to a darkness where any moment the lion can see her and drag her to the hell.

Killing was easy.

But protecting someone is hard and rigid.

I knew how to kill but don't know how to protect except my gang. And I bring this trouble for me.

A sweet delicious trouble which I was so eager to unwrap but couldn't. Threatening her is like threatening a f*****g broken pieces and it's slicing my heart every day.

Although my intention was to protect her from my father doesn't mean that I didn't wanted to have a taste of her. My intention was not truly honest when I was also wait to have a taste of her.

I can protect her from my father but who will protect her from me?

Walking to the bathroom I take off my jeans and boxer. Nakedly I stand on the hard tiles and turned on the shower. Needed to cool down. Needed to cool down this hard c**k which was twitching every time when it was get friction with her soft body.

Fuck me or f**k her.

Fuck this protection thing.

I hold my hard c**k and stroking quickly at imagining her body on me. Imaging her all the time is like a habit now a days. I couldn't able to f**k another girl and also I can't f**k Nandini.

I pumped hard... assuming her face covered with my seeds. I take high then slow down with the thought that I would f*****g her tight p***y and she will come, panting my name.

Damn it. I was so close...

"Fuck." with grumpy tone I released, I look down to see my juices on the wall..... For you Nandini. Only for you.

I hold the wall leaned down a little to feel the water....

Too hard. But I can't fall.

Only f**k or leave. Nothing else.

I can't let my emotion hover over me. I won't fall and I will try hard not to fall. But what can I do when it's only her that I want. It's only her that I want to f**k.

But I can't... I f*****g can't. There is only two option— protect her from the lion and unprotected her from myself. Or else leave the s**t.

I stepped out and wrapped the towel.

I can't be my father but I can't be softy.

In a mob there is no place for softy. This is my world and I have live up to that if I want or not.

If she agrees then okay, she would come or else only the business thing.

Closing the gym door I went to my room. I f*****g need to sleep and I know the boys is home now.... the shouting from down hall confirmed that.

Their little chit chat assured me that they are enjoying when I am in misery. Well not totally in misery... I am also enjoying but not like those two f*****g joker. They are so lost in their f*****g world. Obviously except for the beast. He is not in misery and also not enjoying anything. He only knew how to f**k and give a f**k. And that making me worried. I don't what's going on his head. I don't want him take the down path again.

Harshad needs to be take the high path.... He deserves that. He deserves everything that father denied. And that's why I have to handle the things sincerely.

One mistake can change everything we built. I can't let father win. I wouldn't dare it.

Sighing, I laid on the bed naked and cover up with the sheet and let the sleep control over me.

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