Her Secret Smile (#2)

Chapter- 21

21. "I am going to find whether you are in love with me!"

One of the toughest thing in life is to change our qualities for someone or to something. But sometimes life needs sacrifices to change the scenario so keeping that in mind Roshini decides to avoid Siddharth today as much as possible.

She doesn't know whether she will succeed in this but in order to clear her doubts, she has to do this.

Since how long she will carry this one-sided love, knowing the answer is the best thing compared to secretly longing for his love. Even it is not what she expected she will at least try to move on from this.

Roshini, you can do it! Chanting that she entered Siddharth's house. 

By Nidhi's assumption, her Varun may act that way will Siddharth go similar to Varun was the biggest question that Roshini had.

But Nidhi's words ringed again on her brain that "all boys are same when it comes to love Roshan!"

Okay ok, continue the mission Roshini. But today only he said that he will show his software that means I am going to miss the chance to see his room. Oh god why it is so difficult to avoid you Siddharth.

Whatever don't back off! Telling that she looked for Siddharth in the living room. To her dismay, Mrs. Vikranth only came out with a grin.

"Roshini do you want some coffee, Shiva and Lakshmi will arrive late today," she told.

"No aunty, thanks," she replied.

"Okay, then you wait in the study room or wait here, I am having some work," Meera said and went up.

Roshini followed her and headed to the study room. Is Siddharth in the house? She questioned since she didn't notice his slippers in the front while thinking about her mission.

She checked her watch and again out to find Siddharth, he is not there. 

She silently waited for Shiva and Lakshmi.

Ten, fifteen, twenty, thirty minutes passed. Then Roshini stood up in a frustration and came out to find Siddharth, Lakshmi, and Shiva have arrived.

"Hi Akka sorry for making you wait," Lakshmi said to her.

"It is okay laksh," she smiled and controlled hard not to gaze Siddharth.

"It is because of me Roshini, sorry," Siddharth apologized with a charming smile.

"Okay, I will wait in the study come quickly," she went back without giving a proper response to Siddharth.

Siddharth knotted his brows to see this behavior of Roshini. He went back to his room and Shiva and Lakshmi went to their rooms to change their uniform dress.

When they entered the study room Lakshmi handed a Cadbury Bournville hazelnut-flavored chocolate to Roshini. She looked her questioningly.

"Siddharth bought chocolates for us and to you," She told and that totally immersed her in great regret.

Whether I have to continue this mission? 

"Thank you, but I don't want Laksh," she said.

"Take this please," she compelled.

"Thanks," she bought that on her hand and looked down.

Today Roshini conducted a test on science and math. So after giving the questions, she sat silently looking at them. From tomorrow onwards they are having midterm exams and after that, they will be in holidays till New Year so Roshini doesn't have to come here until that.

Like she expected Siddharth came inside to the room and sat pulling a chair near Roshini. 

"What is for today, test?" Siddharth asked.

"Yeah," Shiva replied.

Without controlling the good girl in her Roshini thanked Siddharth for the chocolate and he smiled but after that, she remained silent. 

"Just two more weeks are there for the college do you know that?"

"I know," she replied without looking at him.

"And how long you are going to come here?" He asked smiling.

"It depends on my Aunt's arrival. I think she will be here next month," Roshini told and looked away.

"You want to see my software," Siddharth asked even knowing her endeavor to avoid him.

Roshini immediately rejected the offer by telling that she needs to go home soon.

That is all he clearly noticed her lack of eye contact, not so interested in talking attitude and main importantly the bright smile she has all the time.

He felt something strange in him to notice all these things. He felt irritated and clenched his jaw to see her rejection. Angry!

He strolled out of the room and Roshini became sad for doing this. Because she never ever acted this way to anyone even to her foe and for the first time she avoided the person whom she loves the most.

That day Roshini didn't found Siddharth out to see her leaving the house. 

I did utterly a wrong thing! Roshini thought while walking to the bus stop. Once she got on the bus she called Nidhi and told everything.

"Super!! Continue this until he gets entirely pissed off," she suggested.

"Hey, are you helping me or..." Before Roshini could finish the sentence.

"Roshan, don't be afraid. It is a great chance to know how much he is attracted to you. This anger is a good sign, you know. If tomorrow he talks with you normally then he is having no feelings for you. But if he didn't there is an ego in his heart that means you are close to his heart. We won't easily get angry or any kind of emotion on people who are not close to us," Nidhi advised.

Roshini agreed to her words and nodded her head. She is too weak and experiences less in practical knowledge compared to Nidhi.

Next day Roshini came to Siddharth's house in an anticipation that he will talk to her normally since she doesn't believe Nidhi's words that Siddharth having feelings for her.

When the moment he entered the house, Siddharth was sitting on the couch along with his dad and showing something on his laptop to him.

He raised his gaze and looked at Roshini without having that priceless smile on his face and swiftly turned his gaze to the laptop. She was surprised to see him.

Vikranth smiled and welcomed her in.

"How are you? Sir," she asked.

"I am fine Roshini," he told.

"Dad! look at this," Siddharth told that in an irritated tone not allowing him to talk to her.

Roshini was even more stunned to notice his change in behavior, till last week he was so nice to her and what happened all of a sudden. Just avoiding him a few times is a great mistake? 

Something wrong! Whether he is in love with me like Nidhi said, she imagined and her heart started to throb crazily.

That entire day Siddharth didn't come into the study room. Roshini waited and waited but he didn't come.

So Roshini understood the other side of Siddharth that he is an ego freak!

Days passed and Roshini was so busy with the exams along with Shiva and Lakshmi. They were pestering her to teach the leftover topics at the last moment.

In that Siddharth was nowhere to be found. He sometimes accidentally meet her and remained quiet as like Roshini.

She doesn't want to break this silence which was maneuvered by Siddharth and wanted to see how long it is continuing.

...

It was Friday their final exam finished, Shiva and Lakshmi were so happy to come home. Today they asked Roshini to visit them and added to that she is getting paid for her tutoring today.

She almost lost all her hope, and she is so confused about Siddharth because he tore whatever she sketched about him, his kind nature, understanding character and all. Siddharth means these are the things that pop in her mind first and she is attracted to him because of this qualities but now he entirely proved that she is wrong in guessing him.

Siddharth didn't come to talk to her and he entirely refused her without a reason.

This plan finally backlashed Roshini that is what she believed from the result she got.

Roshini sat on the living room couch and Meera went to take the money to pay her.

Her Aunt informed yesterday that it will take about another one month for her to return so that means Roshini have to come here after her college starts.

"Roshini, here," she gave the money in her hands and Roshini smiled brightly to get her first pay. She almost had tears on her eyes.

"Thanks, Aunty."

"It is okay dear. You are really good at teaching and my kids always talk about your coaching. I hope they will get good marks in this exams." Meera replied and patted her shoulders.

Roshini smiled lightly for that and hide the money in her purse. She again sat on the couch and waited for Lakshmi and Shiva meanwhile talking with Meera.

Suddenly the sound of rain paused both of them. They both came out and looked at the drizzling rain and smiled.

"Do you like rain Roshini?"

"Yes, I love the rain!" she said enthusiastically. "And you?"

"It is not love, my memories are connected with rain, both sad and happy ones," she told simply looking at rain.

Roshini can feel the deep meaning in her words and remained silent though she wanted to know what those memories are.

When they are admiring the blissful rain. A car entered the compound. 

"They came!" Meera told.

Shiva, Lakshmi, and Vikranth got down from the car and ran to the house. "Hi Akka!" they both exclaimed.

"How were your exams?"

"Great!" Lakshmi announced.

"Fine, I did well," Shiva grinned.

Vikranth went in and along with Meera and two kids. When Roshini turned again her gaze out she didn't expect to see Siddharth. He got down from the driver's seat. He stared straight at her.

Roshini's heart skipped its beat to see him. He was formally dressed and after a long time, he looked her without avoiding.

"Today I and Siddharth went to meet the client and he only conducted the meeting I just stayed quiet Meera," Vikranth told in the background.

"And finishing the meeting he suggested to pick Shiva and Lakshmi so that we all came together," he added.

Siddharth carrying few packages walked towards Roshini. Whether to smile or to avoid, confused Roshini decided to be normal.

This plan, the experiment is all bullshit. If he really loves me then he will confess one day so better stop all these things. It will even worsen the situation so Roshini decides to smile.

To her surprise, Siddharth smiled.

"Hi," he told adding another surprise.

"Hi!"

"Let's go inside," he guided in. What are you Siddharth!!

"Roshini Akka let's go to my room," Lakshmi pulled her hand when she entered the hall.

And Roshini went with her leaving Siddharth's intense gaze. Roshini stayed in Lakshmi room the entire evening by talking about her school, her friends, and her family by having the snacks and coffee given by Meera.

She came to know that their family was so lovable and Siddharth was very obedient and caring person. But why he is acting different only with me? She questioned.

As the time passes Roshini decided to leave. She informed Meera and she gave an umbrella to Roshini. 

She will continue tutoring after two weeks so she looking at the stairs hoping Siddharth will at least come now she wants to ask sorry to him.

But there is no sign that he is there.

Putting her slippers Roshini walked out holding the umbrella over her head. 

The net result of my experiment is Siddharth has no special feelings for me, Roshini told herself and smiled in a dismay.

She came to the road, the flickering street light and drizzling rain gave a company while walking solely on that empty street. She walked a few steps but stopped in the middle unable to control her rushing tears. She took a breath and stepped.

"Roshini!!" Siddharth voice gripped her on the place. She turned to see Siddharth scurried towards her and stood just an inch before her.

Her pupil dilated to be so close to him. She took a step back and looked down to hide her embarrassment and tears.