A Heart's Façade

10th June. Monsoon 2020. "Come on!" A throaty voice with a hint of breathlessness to it exclaimed out of apparent frustration. The burgundy head who was aged just eighteen closed her eyes shut, trying to hold back the tears that had been brimming on her lower eyelid margin, threatening to fall starting the past few hot seconds. Moments after, the voice of her lover Allerion echoed in her head, telling her goodbye the same way he did before he left, in actuality. Her apoplectic temper caught the best of her and soon the lady's gun was again in her possession, and she darted it towards the shooting boards that were a hundred miles ahead. Taking a deep breath with her eyes closed, soon the bullets of the gun fired and made contact with the three boards afar, all piercing through the center of the wood these boards were made of. Bullseye! Eying the gun daringly with the expression which conveyed that shooting the boards was just a warm up and that she was about to shoot her true target now, she positioned it towards her forehead this time. Her salty, cell-burning tears ceased to be visible and receded from sight in the rainfall. She blew through her mouth with the hope that this would be her last breath before she triggered the bullet to escape and pierce through her head, but only to realize that the gun was out of bullets. Not again! Once again, as she tried ending her life, fate favored her otherwise. Why?  Her temper getting to her again, she threw the now useless gun at the open field. She fell to her bruised knees afterwards and punched the stoned, fungy-covered ground with her clenched fists and turned her knuckles bloody. Soon after her childish moves, tears began to slip away down her cheeks at a faster pace as her breathing grew heavier than she could hold back. The slight breeze that distracted her earlier, now slowly grew into wind and, of course, would soon turn into another painful storm. Allerion's smile appeared in the vision of her inner sight, awaking a slight courage in her but she was determined to give up this time. Her loss of him had aged a year today and yet the pain felt fresh like the heartbreak was from yesterday. She was alone before him and she had returned to be in the same state again after him, which was rather harder, and she had no will to live like that when life's weight was already too heavy for her to take. "I can't go on anymore, not like this. I have disappointed you. I apologize, Allerion, I apologize. It is time I should stop." Her tears were persistent and heavy. "This is not me. I do not want to be like this." The context of her words was hard to understand from a third point of view, but the tone of her voice made it audible that she held immense pain in her words. She sobbed in the heavy and almost endless rain, her voice turning rusty as she screamed out in the open field. This had to end here and escape was her plan. Though if not by death from a gun, she would find herself another solution. She walked towards the cliff. Under her was the stony sea which glared back at her from a thousand feet under. Taking a deep breath, the words left her mouth in a low, almost inaudible volume as her body began to let go and let weakness consume her. She was someone who would make herself look strong only to hide how weak she truly believed she was. Her sentimental mind had grown crazy and furious that she was now ready to make mistakes she wouldn't even get to regret as much as she would crave to if she decided to take her life right now. Making her attempt to fall, she let go of her weight as she closed her eyes and hoped to meet her lover in the afterlife where she could perhaps finally find her peace. But her body was instead pulled back, landing on a soft but built surface. Her mix of woody brown and sea green eyes, which are referred to be an effect of sectoral heterochromia, met with a pure pair of hazel eyes that were clear like pools of bourbon. His hair was a little above the shade of blackish brown with natural hints of cedar and carob. Truth be told, it would be an understatement if it was said that she saw an Angel. "You cannot do this, princess." The boy's husky voice spoke. He appeared like he was just in his early thirties but his voice was deep, like he had lived way longer than that. There was a soft raspiness to it; one that fills you with the fuzziness of late autumn, one that brings you warmth against winter. The constant stream of tears down her cheeks took a pause in their flow as her body stiffened at coming in contact with him, for he was stunning. He looked at her with an expression laced with sincerity, like he was about to make a request and not a statement. "Death is never an option." And just like that, her story took a turn and headed towards the fierce future that was awaiting her. Freya's eyes fluttered open to the morning light that reflected upon the hidden artwork in the off-white painted walls of the room as she took in her surroundings. Subsequent to realizing this bedroom was not familiar to her, her guards instantly awakened. A slight skepticism grew in her to know where she was and the fear in her multiplied by every passing second as she processed. For a split moment, her memories had escaped her mind only to return again with full consciousness. She slid her hand inside the blanket made of white silk sheets that she was under. She was situated on a king-sized bed which she realized was not her own. Her hand reached to her thigh to feel the strap that was supposed to be tied to her thighs above the edge of her knee-high stockings, connected to her lingerie under her frock; in search of the gun holder she was wearing the last time she was conscious, looking for her gun and the goodbye letter that Allerion had left her. Well, it was the twenty-first century, of course. A Princess was no longer from a celled castle, though she felt like a prisoner of her own. And nor does she grow the devil's cherry or the angel's trumpet in her green garden to poison her enemies through their tea. Freya was badass. She was like a thornful rose and indeed she was just as beautiful yet fierce. Her heart skipped a beat and a gasp left her raspberry balm tinted, plump lips as she realized she was not wearing the belt, nor the main parts of her lingerie that worked as a bulletproof shield around the bodice that covers her torso from the chest to the waist of her corset. Neither was her frock on. All she was in was an oversized, men's white shirt on her slim body with only her panties underneath. But a slightly relieved sigh soon left her as she noticed her belongings, such as her gunholder with the gun lying along, even though she recalled throwing it away on the open field earlier, and a dried up piece of crumbled paper that had been soaked in water the night before, on the tea table beside the bed she was laid on. Taking the paper in her hand, she opened the crumpled piece up hurriedly, but to her misery, all of Allerion's words had been washed away by the rainwater. Her fingers trembled slightly in panic. No no no... The young man from the day before who pulled Freya back from taking her own life, seemingly entered the room. She had clearly recalled having seen him with cedar brown hair but he now seemed to have dirty blonde hair with a fractional mix of grayish brown, drying it with a towel on his way. The haircut was apparently different as well, but perhaps she must be wrong. However, his eyes were of the very same shade. From the looks of the wet hair that he messily finger combed backwards as he entered the room, it was evident that he had just showered. His eyes grew soft at seeing the lady on his bed silently crying to herself, holding the letter close to her chest. The bed sank under the guy's weight as he sat around the corner, eyeing the girl in front of him. The button-up shirt that was semi-see-through had ridden high up her thighs, which rather distracted the mischief. Finally noticed by her, he served a smile to the internally frightened but daring girl. He had a sharp jaw line and his irises now looked rather black, unlike what she had seen earlier, making it hard for her to recognize him to be the same guy, but she was in doubt if he was not. Freya's eyes had only grown wide on her flustered face with visible anger. "How have I ended up here?" She took no moment to question the boy, whose eyes grew slightly wide at her reaction in a mocking manner with a husky chuckle leaving his lips. Silence played. Freya clenched her fist, feeling like she'd been done wrong. Receiving no reply from the man, she felt further angered and so she took the gun in her possession, aiming it towards the boy in reflex. The guy then raised his hands up in a surrendered form but only to mock her to a greater extent. "Speak. What are your true intentions?" "Relax." The husky voice replied. "Answer and I shall let you go." Her voice was bold and her jaw was clenched with her tone being demandful. "Huh." Chuckled the blonde in disbelief, giving up the play now as she began to deduct the fun he was having. "I suggest you rather calm down and rest up. The one you have been looking for will be here soon. Seek answers from him and not me." he sighed, walking across the room to hang the towel over a hanger. "Don't test me. I will not hesitate to shoot." Freya was perplexed but stood still, not letting him shrug her off easily. "I wouldn't threaten me like that." He chuckled with his raspy voice that had a breathy crisp to it, speaking a tip of advice that Freya had decided not to buy. "I've killed many, I wouldn't mind adding one more name to my list." She sneered. The blonde sighed in response. "Work on your little plan when you have bullets in your play gun next time?" He said, catching her off guard. It had slipped her mind that her bullets were over, which is why she was still alive. Darn it! "Crap.." She hissed to herself in a short gasp of disbelief as she aimed her gun towards the owner of the voice that was teasing her, triggering the gun to shoot, but not a bullet would come out as per the mischief's words. She huffed, throwing the gun to the other end of the room to hit the wall, which caused the guy to coo inaudibly to himself out of feeling impressed before a chuckle left the lips of the boy. "You are welcome." He turned to leave. But a sudden snap of duality had him swiftly turn around and get on top of her suddenly, but he controlled his weight in a plank form as he trapped her smaller body under him. "Also, I mean I don't really mind but..." He took a pause to gaze down at her body with his hooded eyes before continuing to speak. "I think you would like to pull down your shirt a bit before you want the indecent to happen." he said, biting his lips like a tease, as she realized how the shirt had actually ridden high up her thighs which almost revealed her white, lace material panty. The young lady's face flustered, her body heated up due to the skinship. "And you-u t-too will find it w-well for you to get yourself a s-shirt." The girl's cheeks tinted red out of embarrassment as she hated that she stuttered. The boy was only wearing ripped jeans and was shirtless because he had just showered in the past scene. His toned, muscular body was full on show, which distracted Freya, but she still had the consciousness to keep herself guarded from a stranger. "And might as well learn to mind your own business next time." she muttered through gritted teeth again before pushing him off of her. Leaving the boy dumbfounded on the floor, she took her belongings and rushed out of the stranger's house. He chuckled from the floor, as he continued to stare at the bedroom door that Freya rushed out of. Cute. The brown-haired man she had first encountered finally entered, making the blonde head get back up on his feet and throw a piece of clothing towards him which was made of the same white lace material that he had just seen. "Here, your girl left her bra behind."