You still have my undying love! Really never left, wife

It's 5pm and I’m still here inside my hospital office. I don’t know how much time I spent there, sobrang dami ko ng iniisip these past few weeks. I wanted to open up to Mitch but I just couldn’t. pag sinabe ko sa kanya. I’m sure she’ll do something mapaghiwalay lang kami ni Zach. I just need time to think. I love him but I’m really tired of fooling myself. This marriage is no longer working. “How could he do that to me? He’s a jerk”, I whispered to myself. Why would he lie to me? How long is he lying? f*ck him! “why?” asking myself, as if I knew the answer. “I heard she’s your ex-fiancé!” I cried. How I wish I hadn't said yes to my parents. He used to be my first love and didn't expect this to happen. ang dami kong naririnig tungkol sa kanya. My friends even texted me sometimes that they saw Zach with a girl, but I didn’t believe in them because I chose to be blind, even though there's a possibility that my friends saw Zach with a girl. I don’t want them to think that I’m not happy with Zach anymore. So I had to defend him and make a story not until I saw him with a girl in my own eyes. I have my own hospital. My parents gave this to me when I graduated from college. Zach is an Atty and a CEO at the same time. he was the one who managed their company, pati na rin ang kompanya namin. may parents adore him so much. that’s why kahit mag sumbong pa ako sa kanila, they’ll never listen to me. I was about to go inside my car when my phone beep. It’s a text message from him, asking where I am. “As if you care” I mumbled to myself. Because of anger, I got off my phone rather than reading his f*ck*ng text message. every time he tries to call me, I always pretend that I didn’t heard my phone. ayuko pa siyang kausapin. I drove my car to my condo. hindi rin nag tagal ay dumating na ako dahil hindi ganon kalayo ang hospital ko sa condo. I feel exhausted kaya’t agad akong nahiga sa kama. I was about to close my eyes when I decided to open my phone, since I shut it off. As I expected, 100 messages from him. Instead of reading his text message, I dialed Mitch's number. “HEY SABRINA NICOLE! COULD YOU PLEASE GO HOME TO YOUR HUSBAND? I HEARD YOU DIDN'T COME HOME THIS PAST FEW DAYS. ARE YOU CRAZY?” She Hesterically said. “Can you please, lower down your voice?” “Are you too in a fight na naman? he called me. One week kana daw di umuuwi, really Rina? Are you out of your mind? pag nalaman na naman to nina Tita, I don’t know what will happen!” pagalit niyang saad ngunit kalmado na. see? She looks like my mom, and yeah, she has no idea. I don’t even think Zach knew why I was acting like that. Maybe I’m crazy. “You heard me, right? You ignored his calls and didn’t even reply to his text message. ano ba iniisip mo?” Naiirita na niyang sabi sakin, fine. I’ll do what she said. “Fine. I’ll call him. happy now?” pilit kong kinakalma ang sarili. Mitch is my cousin, she’s the only person who could understand me. bata pa lang kami laging kami ang mag kasama. Laging siya rin ang kasama ko sa bahay everytime my parents is out of town kaya nasanay na ako sa pagsesermon niya sakin. I trusted her but I couldn’t tell her my problem. I shouldn’t drag her into this. She’s out of this. “I’m sorry okay? Just tell me Kung may problema kayo, but please call him. He’s probably worried about you. He’s your husband anyway.” ani niya sa mas mababang boses. kumalma na to, sigurado ako. She knows me, may Isang salita ako. “Alright! Ate Mich” I giggled at the thought of her, napipikon na naman mukha nito. “yocc Rina, stop it. Isang taon lang naman ang agwat naten.” natatawa niyang saad “Fine. bye na” pag putol ko sa tawag. When I ended the call, I decided to dial Zach’s number. “Wait. what I’m going to say?” frustrated kong tanong sa sarili ko. When I tend to dial his number, my phone rang. Guess what? He called me. I inhaled myself before I answered his call. No one dare to talk, kahit siya ay hindi nag salita. damn. I heard him sighed, siguro'y nag hihintay na mag salita ako. “Sabrina, where are you?” bakas ang lungkot sa kanyang boses ng tanongin niya ako. He’s drunk. I can sense it in his voice. I calm myself, I don’t want to ask him this way. So calm yourself Sabrina. hindi ko alam kung pang ilang beses kong bumuntong hininga. I hated him for making me feel this way, but I didn’t have the guts to ask him. “Nasa condo ako” malumanay kong sabi dahil ayokong mahalata sa boses ko na galit ako sa kanya. “Are you drunk?” pagalit kong tanong sa kanya dahil bakas sa boses niya na nakainom ito. “A bit. I miss you. Can you go home?” ani nito. Natahimik ako sa tanong niya. ayoko pang umuwi, but if I’ll stay like this, he’ll go there. gayun pa na nalaman niyang nandito ako. “I’m not sure” mahina kung sagot sa kanya. I heard him sigh na para bang nawalan ng pag asa sa narinig mula sakin. “Please go home. We’ll talk” ani niya. “Nag uusap na tayo Zach!” masungit at pabara kung sagot sa kanya. “I want you to be here, we’ll talk when you are already here” now, he’s annoyed. a short-tempered jerk. “Fine! Tomorrow” I can see his smirking, I was about to say goodbye but I stopped when he talked. “I love you” he said. I smiled bitterly, bakit feeling ko nag sisinungaling lang siya sakin. “Good night” were the only words I uttered after the long silence. After I talked to him that night, I cried. I love him but it seems like he’s still into his ex. pero hindi ko maintindihan kumbakit pa siya pumayag sa kasal. Is it because of my parents? Ayaw niya silang ma disappoint? that’s bullshit. I woke up early, and I decided to go home. I told Rea, sekretarya ko na hindi muna ako pupuntang hospital. ako na man ang may ari, I can do anything I want. Kasalukuyan akong kumakain when someone barged into my condo. sino pa nga ba, only Mitch could do that without knocking. “Here you are Mrs. Martinez!” pambungad niya sakin. Umupo siya sa upuan sa harapan ko, napairap nalang ako ng inumin niya ang paborito kong orange juice. Wtf “What brought you here Ylena?” trying to tease her. Napaismid siya sa pangalan na tinawag ko sa kanya. she really hated her first name ha. “So, kelan mo pa ako tinawag sa pangalan na yan NICOLE?” ngisi niya sakin. She even emphasized my second name. and yeah, kung siya ayaw niya sa first name niya, well, ayoko rin na tinatawag ako sa unang pangalan ko. I rolled my eyes at her. “Are you not going to eat?” pag iiba ko sa usapan. “No thanks! I just heard uuwi kana. good” ani niya. tinawanan ko nalang siya. “Yeah, thanks to you”, sarcastic kung sagot, but she just smirked at me. “Seriously, I went here kasi nag aalala ako sayo. Is there something you didn’t tell me?” bigla akong napalunok sa tanong niya. I smiled and pretended that everything was alright. “Masyado ka namang seryoso. nothing. we’re good. nagkaroon lang ng misunderstanding.” I smiled at her once more to convince her that I was fine. She looked confused pero ngumiti rin sa huli. “Okay then. I shall go ahead. seems like everything is fine. sige, pupunta nalang muna ako ng hospital. I’ll take care of it, Muna.” I nodded to her and she kissed my cheek before she left. Pagkatapos kung maligo. I checked the time and it was already 1pm. So I had to prefer myself. When I was about to step into the elevator, I saw a familiar face. I knew her, she’s the girl. biglang sumama ang pakiramdam ko ng makita ko siya. talaga namang dito ko pa siya makikita? don’t tell me Zach let her stay here. kalma Sabrina, instead of pulling her hair, binaliwala ko nalang. ayoko mag mukhang tanga sa harap niya. pumasok na ako sa loob but when the elevator was about to close, may pabidang humarang para pumasok. nananadya ba siya? I wonder if she knew. No one dare to talk, buti naman dahil hindi ako makakapagpigil kapag nag parinig siya dyan. nagulat kaming pareho ng tumigil ang elevator. damn! bakit ngayon pa? “s**t” I murmured. “Ouch” napatingin ako sa kanya at napangiwi sa nakita. may sugat siya? where did she get that? magsasalita sana ako ng mamatay ang ilaw, malas nga naman talaga. I want to ask her but my pride says no. I made a call instead. what kind of hotel is this? sa pagkakaalam ko hindi pa naghihirap si Zach. napangisi nalang ako. “Hello? What happened? I’m stuck here inside the elevator, yes, I’m with someone. bilisan niyo!” Inip kong binaba ang tawag. I creased my forehead nang marinig ko na may kausap ang linta na to. Is that Zach? pinagtaasan ko siya ng kilay kahit alam kong hindi niya ako kita. “Hello! Eli, I’m s-scared! I was stuck inside the elevator. Y-yeah! please. I don’t know what to do. I need you here. O-okay, I’ll wait. Yes. I love you!” mangiyak iyak niyang saad. Naikuyom ko nalang ang kamay ko sa galit. This b***h knew that I was his wife, but pretended that she didn’t know. “please! don’t cry. hold on” payo ko sa sarili dahil kunti nalang bubuhos na naman sila. tang*na. I don’t want her to see that I’m affected pero yung luha ko, parang agos na bigla nalang bumuhos. “B*tch!” ang tangi kong nasabi, kasabay nun ang siyang pagpatak ng aking luha at siyang pagbukas muli ng ilaw. I wish she had heard me. When the door finally opened, dali dali akong lumabas. baka masampal ko lang siya. I don’t care if Zach went to her. Eli ha! She called her by that? Cringe Naiinis ako, gusto ko siyang sampalin. gusto ko siyang sigawan, to tell her to stop ruining us pero wala akong lakas ng loob. What if Zach still loved her? My tears can’t stop falling. I was half running sa takot ko na baka maabot ako ni Zach dito pero mas Lalo akong nanghina ng makita kong buhat-buhat niya ang babae! It looks like she fainted. pabida. ang dali niyang mauto sa babae na yun. Now everything is clear. I knew what to do na. 3 years of being together and all my life sa kanya lang ako naging masaya. I didn’t expect this to happen or maybe I was too blind to see the problems. Inikot ko ang paningin ko sa buong bahay. One week, I wasn’t there. ang lungkot lungkot ng bahay na’to ngayon. at ngayon na umuwi na ako, akala ko maaayos ko pa. mag uusap daw kami. for what? para mag singungaling siya? sabihin na naman na hindi yun totoo? This time, I will ask him the same question. If he tells me the truth, I’ll let him explain and give him a second chance, but if he still denies it, I’ll divorce him. That’s the consequence. Its 11pm pero wala pa siya. I waited for him sa sala. drinking my favorite liquor! Yeah, I should celebrate, right? I think, I’m a little bit tipsy. mukhang ang dami kung nainom. well, its okay! hindi pa naman ako ganon kalasing. lalagyan ko sana ulit ang baso ko ng may biglang epal na pumigil sakin. ang daming pabida ngayon. “Enough!” pagalit na sabi niya. Now, he’s acting like a caring husband to me. I smirked at him “why? acting as if you care?” Napakunot siya ng noo sa sinabi ko, confused ha. “You’re drunk. I’ll bring you to our room.” Tumawa ako. ngayon he wants me to feel that he loves me, that he cared for me? Boy, you can’t fool me! “Enough of this”, then I drank the last liquor in my glass. I smiled playfully at him. I carried his face. I stared at him because I was afraid that this is the last time I'd see him. bakit hindi ko kaya? bumuhos ang traydor kong luha. kahit kailan talaga traydor to and this time he saw it. he saw me cry. “What happened?” nag aalala niyang tanong. Umiwas ako ng tingin. aakyat na sana ako ng hawakan niya ang kamay ko. “Don’t turn your back on me. tinatanong pa kita. What made my wife cry? hmm? Can you tell me what’s going on?” natahimik kaming pareho. Seryoso ko siyang tiningnan. This will be the last that we’ll see each other again. I swear tonight. I’m done with him. Mukha na siyang frustrated ng hindi ko siya sinagot, tuloy tuloy lang ang pag tulo ng mga luha ko. “Do we have a problem? Please, say a few words.” ani niya at parang takot sa anumang isasagot ko. Maybe he’ll be happy after this. “I want d-divorce!” deretsahang sabi ko sa kanya and swear I don’t used to this. finally! I said those words. napalunok siya sa sinabe ko. He was surprised. bago pa niya ako mapigilan, I ran outside and thanked God dahil dala ko yung susi ng kotse ko. I saw him run to me, so, I locked the door and drove my car as fast as I could. Hindi ko na alam ang gagawin ko. my eyes gets blur dahil sa luhang nag uunahang bumuhos. siguro, dahil nasabi ko. nasabi ko na sa kanya. hindi ko siya natanong dahil natatakot ako. natatakot akong marinig ang sasabihin niya. mas binilisan ko pa ang takbo na sasakyan ngunit nararamdaman ko nahihilo na ako. No, not now. I didn’t know where to go. My mind went blank and my hand was shaky. pakiramdam ko salo ko lahat ng problema sa mundo. My phone rang and it was Zach. I don’t want to answer that. Tapos na kami, tinapos ko na. we’ll divorce. My senses back when I saw a dam truck, nanginig ako sa takot. I was about to step the car brake, but it doesn’t work. kaya’t sinubukan kong lumiko ngunit hindi ko namalayan ang isa pang kotse but its too late for me because I didn’t saw the car coming in my way. The last person I saw was Mitch. She was crying habang yakap ako. I wanted to talk pero masyado akong Nanghihina, then everything went blank.