The Last Letter

46 (BONUS CHAPTER)

Chapter XLVI- BONUS CHAPTER

Benjamin’s POV

I woke up to the sound of my alarm ringing so loudly.

I did my morning routine as usual. Stretching, taking a cold shower, waiting for my siblings to dress up in their school uniforms, helping them prepare for school and then heading straight to my favorite breakfast place. Why don't we eat breakfast at home? The answer is simple. Well, these past few weeks, my family has become problematic again for the millionth time. I only speak to my siblings, not to mom and of course, neither to my dad.

About three weeks ago, I went home tired from all of my practice that day, just to see dad scolding my youngest and second youngest sisters because they failed a subject in their school. My sisters were kneeling on the cold floor, looking down and crying. Their exam papers were torn all over the floor. Mom was there, looking so angry, holding a stick in her hand.

They were only 10 and 8 years old, an age where they shouldn’t worry about anything. But mere failing of a subject is enough to make them go down on their knees, scared as if they’ve done something so unforgivable. It may seem as a form of discipline but I won’t buy it. Mom and dad have been like this since I was young.

I walked towards my sisters and helped them stand up.

“What do you think you’re doing Benjamin? Both of you, kneel down!” Dad’s loud voice echoed all throughout the living room.

“No dad. They’re just kids. Don’t do this to them or you’ll regret it someday!” I felt my heart pounding. Not because of something like what I feel for Suzanne but because of fear that I shouted back at my dad. This isn’t the first time but I always get scared whenever I stand up for myself. But now, I can never bear to look at my sisters in this kind of situation. I can take all the pain for them.

Dad laughed maniacally. “If you don’t stop what you’re doing right now, it is you who’ll regret it someday Benjamin!

I bent down to whisper to my sisters. “Go to your rooms and lock your doors. I’ll be with you after this. Let me take care of mom and dad.” They nodded teary eyed and ran towards the stairs and to their rooms.

“So you’ll go against me again today huh? Do you not have anything better to do? Why did you grow up disobedient and defiant against your parents?”

“Please mom, dad. Don’t hurt them. I’ll talk to them why they failed those subjects, I’ll talk to their teachers too.” I said to calm them down.

“And why would you do that? That’s our responsibility.”

“I know, but you don’t do your responsibility enough. You can’t even keep track of what they’re doing mom.” I said.

“Wow! When did you learn to talk back to your mother?” Dad said and walked towards me. He stopped when we were facing each other. “I just told the truth. It isn’t my fault that I see it that way.” I bravely said but inside, I’m shaking in fear.

“You are really different, you know that? When will you grow up Benjamin? You’ve become worse and worse over time. You are an embarrassment in our family!”

I felt myself getting dizzy. I clenched my fist and bit my lips hard, stopping myself from saying more words that defy my dad. Dad walked away from me and sat on the couch.

“I spent so much money just to give you what you need and here you are, you can’t even follow what I say. Look at your brother, he’s been living the best life. How about you? When you grow older, you can’t compete anymore.”

“But that’s what I want to do dad!” I shouted.

“And it’s not beneficial for our family! What if you lose? People will point fingers at us? What will happen to my reputation?” Dad shouted back.

“Why do you only care about your reputation? My sisters, why would you punish them for that simple failing of a grade? They’re still young, they still can fix that. What will you do if they become traumatized?” I said in a serious manner. I’m holding myself back from saying more. He’s your dad Benjamin.

“Because our family can’t fail! I don’t want them to end up like you so I’m disciplining them earlier. In that way they won’t go against me like what you always do. For Pete’s sake Benjamin! Please grow up! How much longer will you defy me?” Dad raised his voice more than before.

“Because that’s what you deserve!” I closed my eyes. “I can take all your harsh words and physical punishment but never ever do that to my sisters! I grew up like this because of both of you! If I could be reborn in another family, I will never wish to be here again because I’m so tired of all the bullshit you caused me! You mom, you know nothing but just dressing up as if everyday is an occasion. You can’t even pack your children their lunches. Do you know how much I envy August’s mom? She even treats me like a son more than what you make me feel. And you dad, there were more than a thousand reasons why I will hate you forever! I can never even enjoy my dream because I was always scared to fail. I was so scared that if I fail, you will disown me and kick me out of this family. But now, even if you kick me out at this moment, I won’t regret telling this to you because that’s how I feel ever since. You boast about me if I win my competitions but are quick to judge me whenever I fail. You care about your friends more than your own family. Tell me, do you know you are a father of 5 children?”

I felt tears streaming down my face. I stared at the look of their shocked faces. Dad looked at me angrily and walked out of the room, mom cried in front of me and slowly walked past.

I don't regret anything I said that night. If ever dad disowned me one of these days, I think I could live by myself using the money I saved up from my daily allowance as an athlete and the cash I received as prizes in my competitions. I’m also close to graduating so I don’t care about anything now.

It’s been like three weeks since that incident and I wasn’t kicked out or anything. It’s just that it was very awkward. Mom and dad spoke a little to my sisters but never said a thing to me after that night. I don’t mind it though since I was also busy in my practice and working out everyday. And it wasn’t new to me. I’ve been feeling this way for a decade now. It’s just that, my feelings erupted that night because of exhaustion, stress and pressure.

I was the one who brought my sisters to school everyday before going to university. I also bring them to my favorite places for breakfast or cook for them if I’m not running late. I only have my sisters in this house who fully support my dreams. Before I move out because of getting tired of all of these family matters, I should at least spend some time with my sisters. Can you believe I’m more stressed in the house rather than in school or in my practices.

And of course, I haven’t told anyone about what happened, just like what I always do. I like to hide all my pains and show a smile outside. Well, faking a smile is the most painful lie but it is certainly the most effective way to hide from all the questions.

***

Third Person’s POV

“I found the perfect person for you.” Her dad said.

“Dad. Why should I marry someone I don’t know?”

“Do it for me Venice. I can’t rest in peace if I’m leaving you without anyone you can lean on to. I’m dying, I want you to marry someone I trust.”

She just nodded and held her dad’s hands. “If you really trust him, then I’ll be okay dad. I’ll do anything for you.” She whispered as tears rolled down her face. She smiled at her dad who was lying in the hospital bed.

Weeks later, her dad passed away due to his terminal illness.

She went to the place where her dad’s ashes were scattered. She stood by the sea, letting the cool breeze touch her face. Getting teary eyed again, she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. It was such a nice and sunny day but she can’t help feeling grief from her loss of a loved one.

Venice hears footsteps from the water. She opened her eyes and looked to her right. She locked eyes with a guy standing not that far away from her. She smiled at the familiar person she saw.

It was Benjamin.

To be continued…