The Last Letter

48

Chapter XLVIII

“Have you contacted him?” I sighed and groaned. Not that I was mad that it was actually a message from Suzanne but I was feeling really frustrated that I haven’t received a response from my best friend. After all that message, I haven’t gotten a single reply from him. Even a single letter reply will be greatly appreciated.

But then I thought maybe he was really busy… but why would he be busy during the holidays?

“No. I talked to his mom but she herself doesn’t know where Ben is.” I replied to her text message.

“I’m getting so worried now. I’m messaging him too but I haven’t got any reply.” She texted back immediately.

“Me too. I want to talk to him but I don’t know where he is.”

“Let’s just hope for a reply. I’ll call your telephone later okay? I’m going now, I need to help my sister in law in cooking.”

“Okay. Be safe.” I replied. I checked my pager again for the last time if there were new message but to my disappointment, I found nothing new. I threw my pager on my bed.

I then sighed for the millionth time today, stretched my body as I stood and walked to the window. I opened my window all the way up and watched as the sky turned yellow and orange as time quickly passed by.

“Where are you Ben?” I whispered to myself and leaned my head against the sides of my window, just staring at the orange skies. It’s therapeutic and calming. The breeze was cold now and it will get colder later, maybe because it was December, the coldest time of the year. The weather today was also perfect.

“Hey.”

I arched my brows and looked around me but no one was around. Is someone calling me? Am I hearing things now? Why does it have to be Ben’s voice? Am I thinking about him too much?

“Hey! August!” You dumbass!”

This time, the voice became louder and clearer. I looked around me once again and I heard a whistling sound. I looked outside and saw a hand waving on the gate. Upon looking closer, I realized who it was and… I felt genuine excitement and relief. It’s also amazing how he showed up at the most perfect timing.

“Ben!” I shouted from my window. I don’t really care if everyone in the neighborhood hears me. I was just really happy I got to see my best friend today.

I hurried down the stairs and I didn’t even bother to wear slippers. When I reached the doorstep, I just went straight to the gate to open it, just to see Ben wearing his ear to ear smile that I know, kind of forced.

“Where have you been all this time?” I raised my voice and crossed my arms in front of him. I made myself look serious so he will answer me seriously.

“Sorry. I just had some stuff I needed to sort.” He said and faked a smile. I know what's real and what’s fake, I’ve been friends with Ben since forever.

“What stuff? You’ve been so secretive, do you know that?” As I said that, I immediately felt guilt inside my head and heart. Wow, who am I to tell Ben is becoming secretive? Like I’ve been so honest with him when I’m hiding so many important things from him. Who am I to talk like that, right?

“I know I know, I’m sorry. Things have been tough these past few weeks.” He said and leaned on the hood of his car behind him.

“I know. I heard from your mom, I talked to her earlier.” I replied.

“What? Why did you talk to her? What did she say?” He arched his eyebrows and looked straight at me.

“I was wondering where you are since you never answer my texts so I called your house. Is there anything wrong? She sounded so sad.” He sighed and closed his eyes while his head facing the orange skies. “No. Don’t call our telephone number again. We just argued about something, that’s it.”

“Hmm… okay.” The only thing I answered and shut up about that matter. He sounded serious so maybe it is not my place to talk about his family stuff. It somewhat made me sad that it was his birthday today and it was also Christmas eve. On these special days, Ben should be celebrating with his own family but instead, he was away from home. He doesn’t even want to go home.

“So… happy birthday my brother. How will you celebrate today? I didn’t prepare a gift since our friendship is enough. I can only give me, myself, and I for you.” Okay I know that was cringey but I should change the topic, let’s now talk about his birthday.

“Eww August!” He exclaimed and looked at me with a face, full of disgust. “But… I don’t know. I don’t care about that stuff anymore. There’s nothing special for my birthday anyways.” He added.

“What! Really? So you’re not celebrating this year?” I asked in disappointment and pouted my lips.

“Yes… I guess.” He took a deep breath and paused for a while, “By the way, I’m sorry for not answering your messages. I quite didn’t want to talk to anyone these past few days so I distanced myself from anyone. I just felt better today for some reason.”

“Okay… why don’t you just go here tomorrow or sleepover for tonight if you’re uncomfortable in your house? I don’t have anything to do since it’ll just be Christmas eve anyways. Maybe we could just watch some movies and eat for the whole night later.” I suggested. I got excited by the thought of the old days. When we were young, Ben almost didn’t wanna leave my house because he spent so much time sleeping over with me.

“Nice idea but no thanks. It’ll be embarrassing to spend Christmas at another family’s house.” I rolled my eyes when he said that.

“You know what, you’re thinking too much. You’re a family to me.” I replied and winked at him even though that seemed disgusting. He smirked while looking down and shaking his head a little.

“Thank you.”. He whispered but still was looking down. Is it a miracle? He didn’t feel disgusted of my wink.

“It’s okay Ben. Everything will be okay sooner or later. Just be happy today since it is your special day and it’s Christmas. We’ll finally become the same age again. Think about my offer again. You are always welcome in our house. And by the way, Suzanne will spend the holidays in the farm house.”

He just nodded and didn’t say anything. I thought, mentioning Suzanne would give him some kind of energy but it was like he didn’t care much.

I sat beside him as everything between us became silent again. I don’t mind it, what’s more important is that I could see my friend. Sometimes, talking isn’t necessary, just staying by their side during tough times is enough.

“Should we take a stroll around?” I suddenly whispered right in his ears.

It made him almost jump out of his seat. With one brow raised, he looked at me. “Aren’t you supposed to help your mom? I just came by to greet them and I’ll leave after.” He said.

“Nah, it’s okay. Aries will be here anytime by now so the house will turn upside down again. How about your brother? Will he come by for Christmas or your birthday?” I asked.

“He’s actually been at home since yesterday.” He answered back.

“Oh really? I’ll tell Aries so they can see each other even briefly.” I know my brother will be stoked to see his long time friend, Ben’s brother who was a doctor.

Ben just nodded and everything went silent again. It was getting dark and a colder wind now surrounds the town. The sun is completely gone and only the dark orange and purple-ish sky remains? I was only wearing a thin shirt and pajamas so I really felt the cold wind hugging my low-tolerance-to-cold-air body.

“Let’s go inside now. It’s getting cold.” I said

He stood up and grabbed some things inside his car that I assume were gifts based on how he packaged them.

Unlike me, it is Ben’s tradition to give mom and my brothers gifts during Christmas. He was really a better son than I am. It’s a shame we weren’t born from the same parents. But then, if Ben and I were brothers, I think we will fight a lot since I think he would become the most favorite child because he is a perfect son.

So… yeah, I guess the tradition won’t break today.

To be continued…