Transition
863 Words
I was delirious.
I wasn’t sure if my eyes were even open or if I was just seeing things. Flashes of blurred yet bright lights, the occasional image of my loved ones standing over me. Ghostlike in their appearance, voices sounding like muffled echoes.
The screams, oh my god the screams. I couldn’t handle the volume, a heightened sensitivity meant they felt like my ear drums were bursting.
I’m not sure how much time passed before I recognised them as my own.
Time stood still and sped by, seemingly at the same time. Hot and cold sweats, writhing.
My hands ached from clenching the sheets, every muscle in my body ached as they worked to support my remodelling bones.
It was searing hot fire and the most incredible dull ache simultaneously.
I’d had the flu before, one Winter when I was 14. At the time, I was miserable. Bed ridden for two weeks, sheets soaked from sweat, pillow cases soaked from my tears.
Right now, I’d give anything to go back to that.
I wanted to give up, to give in. I wanted to die, more than anything. I just wanted the pain to stop.
Suddenly, I was kneeling before a lake.
Clouds covered the moon, giving the clearing a soft glow. A gentle breeze felt like bliss on my skin, a caress to my frayed nerves.
What was I wearing? I didn’t remember putting this one, shouldn’t I be in a hospital gown?
In fact, how did I get here?
Where was here? I knew all the pack lands, none of this seemed familiar.
The lake was still, surface like a mirror. I felt compelled to lean over and see my reflection.
She looked like me, this girl staring back.
Me, but stronger somehow. Me, with more defined yet somehow more beautiful features. The mousy diminutive Zara had been replaced with a woman, who looked so sure of herself. So confident. So womanly.
The Zara reflection reached out towards me, her hand broke the water’s surface disrupting the vision. Ripples spread out as her hand touched my face, open palm and fingers gently cupping my cheek.
A perfectly audible wolf howl came from under the water’s surface.
“See, this is who you are. Look.”
“Zara? Honey?”
My eyes tried to open but felt glued shut, weighted down by fatigue.
“Zara, it’s me Mum,” her voice came at a whisper.
As I groggily became aware, I sensed her hand on my cheek in the same place the Zara reflection had been touching. It must have just been a hallucination.
“Mu… Mum?” My mouth was so dry, like I’d swallowed sand. I smacked my lips together trying to salivate.
“Oh honey, it’s okay. Don’t try to move okay? I’ll get you some water.”
Moving was the last thing on my mind, I’m not sure I could have even if I wanted to. My body felt alien to me. Was I paralysed? Surely not.
Teeth gritted, I focused on trying to wiggle my toes. Sure enough I felt them move under the bed sheets.
Footsteps neared, the unmistakable sound of Mum’s hard wearing work shoes… wait, how did I hear them so well?
Focus. What else can I hear?
Beeping, the vital signs monitor watching over me.
A gentle hiss… Is that, oxygen? I wrinkled my nostrils, sure enough I had an oxygen line on me.
Low whirring hum, human breathing, shoes scuffing, pen on paper, keyboard clacking… Oh goddess I could even hear what was going on outside. Birds chirping, leaves rustling, the faraway sounds of the warriors training.
Overwhelmed by the sudden sensitivity, I brought my hands to my ears. I almost gave myself whiplash from the unexpected speed and strength of my movement however.
Okay, definitely not paralysed.
Comfort, the gentle and familiar touch of Mum’s hand on my forehead, fingers trailing as she brushed my hair behind my ear.
I opened my eyes.
So bright! I groaned, who decided such bright lights were a good idea for the Transition wing? I’d definitely be speaking to someone about it once I recovered.
A straw touched my dry and chapped lips, I eagerly sucked at it.
It was like the breeze at the lake. A cool chill against the lingering heat burning inside, I couldn’t get enough.
After what seemed like an eternity, I finished the glass of water on offer.
Eyes squinting, my hands cradling my ears protectively, this felt worse than the hangover I earned from the party I snuck off to last year.
“How… long?” I managed to utter.
“Three weeks.”
I was out for three weeks?! It had felt like mere hours, and yet also like an eternity.
“Rest now baby girl, allow your wolf to heal you. You’ll be up and at it in no time. I promise.”
I didn’t want to rest, I wanted to get up and test out my new body, meet my wolf, but I was utterly exhausted. Drained.
I fought to stay awake.
Try as I may, the fatigue overwhelmed me.
Once again, the world became black.
- Writer
