How to Love What's Been Broken

She looks stunning, then again she had always looked stunning. Stunning or not, it didn't take away the sting of absolute resentment Faye held for the woman across the room. Bringing her glass to her lips, Faye watched as Nyxie Lochlan made the rounds, saying hello to everyone in the room, as was required of her. She knew it was only a matter of time until Nyxie made her way to where she was standing, avoiding the crowd of poshly dressed wolves. Was she ready to see her again? No. She didn't think she was, but could it honestly be avoided? Also, no. She was informed by Theron that she had to be here, no matter how much she had argued that she hated it. Leaning into the man, she asked quietly: "You sure we can't sneak out?" And frowned as he smiled and shook his head. “Afraid not Little witch, it is a requirement of your scholarship that you attend all social events for which you receive an invitation.” She knew that, of course she knew that, but damn did she hate it. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ - Nyxie arrived in time for the party she didn’t want to be at and proceeded to make the rounds, greeting and making small talk with all the people she didn’t like, under the watchful eyes of her parents. It was just another day playing Lochlan Heir. Except it was not just another day, because it was also the anniversary of her worst, well, her only breakup. The only one that mattered enough to deserve the title of breakup in her head, and she wished she was home in her apartment in her bed. With a sappy book and something disgustingly sweet. She could feel fissures growing in her polite mask, as if it was made of fragile glass and about to shatter. All it would take was one or two more badly disguised digs at her career of choice. Fortunately for her, nobody else in this party knew her well enough to tell. She sipped her drink, internally lamenting that it didn’t contain more alcohol and she couldn’t get drunk in front of all those politically important people. First, she didn't want to deal with the consequences of the public humiliation later, and second, her mother's eyes were burning a hole in the back of her head even now, a clear warning to behave. This was when she caught sight of something unexpected. Across the room stood a woman with painfully familiar, distinctive wild black and red hair. For a second, Nyxie thought she’d seen wrong, or maybe that it could be someone else with a really similar hair color. It was more likely than running into this person in such an event. But the woman turned around so Nyxie could see all of her, rather than just her profile, their eyes met, and she knew it was not a mistake on her part. That was Fayelear Celeste, all grown up, in a beautiful dress, standing beside Theron Orion. Nyxie had heard the younger girl had gotten accepted into Maldwyn Academy. She also had known that Caelum and Theron had picked an apprentice recently, though she had not known anything about them until that very moment. Nyxie hadn't even set foot in the Marlowes since her breakup 3 years before. There was no place for a wolf among witches, if the wolf was no longer a friend. All the memories from there were kept in a little box she had labeled “an unlikely adventure that was doomed from the start”. Her very own book-worthy story. Seeing a character from this story in Nyxie's boring day-to-day life in Maldwyn was jarring. Almost surreal. Maybe it was the alcohol or the date or… Temporary insanity? All Nyxie knew was that she was moving toward that ghost of her past before she made the conscious decision to do so. Without any idea what she was going to say to the woman once she was standing in front of her. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ - The second their eyes met, Faye knew Nyxie recognized her. “s**t!” She thought to herself, downing her drink and smoothing out the front of her dress. She wasn't ready for this! “Relax, Faye, it's just Cheeks.” She thought, trying to calm her nerves. Smiling slightly to herself as the memory of the first time she had ever met Nyxie Lochlan played across her thoughts. It was a particularly warm day so they had all gone down to play in the puddles. She and Lux were splashing and slinging mud when she heard her sister yell at them to stop for a second. Looking up, she saw her sister standing in front of her with a very pretty, very clean girl. "Who is this?" Her younger self had asked. "This is Nyxie," Bea started before being interrupted by Lux "She looks like a wolf." "She is." Bea shot him a look that clearly said he needed to shut up. Faye had laughed and flicked a bit of mud at her sister and this new girl, taking in her nice clothes, her cute disgruntled face, and her pretty pink cheeks. "What's the matter, Cheeks, don't like a little mud?" Her tiny self had asked fake-innocently. "Fayelear!" Her sister's voice faded into Theron’s as she was brought back to reality. - Faye was looking directly at her as she approached, so Nyxie had no doubts that she was recognized as well. Nyxie hadn't exactly changed that much since breaking up with Beatrix, physically or otherwise. She'd never given that fact any thought or importance, until that very moment when it suddenly felt significant somehow, though she couldn't tell how or why. She wasn’t sure how to feel about that. Fayelear had certainly changed a lot since they last saw each other. Of course she'd changed, the last time Nyxie had seen her she'd been only 15 years old. She was 18 now. Her hair was obscenely long, her curls seemed to be tamed by the weight and she wore it in two braids rather than one. But she still looked like the little s**t that followed her and Beatrix everywhere and found delight in making Nyxie's life difficult. Nyxie set her empty glass in the tray of a passing server, letting the false smile on her face disappear in favor of a smaller, but more sincere one, knowing that neither person she was about to talk to would buy or appreciate her bullshit, and both were very likely to call her out for it should she even try. “Hello, Theron. And Fayelear." She greeted them. "I was glad to hear you achieved the scholarship for Maldwyn Academy. Congratulations.” Fayelear deserved it, after all, and of that Nyxie was sure. The young girl might have been a hellion, but she was breathtakingly smart, and incredibly creative. - "Thanks, Cheeks. I'm going by just Faye now." Faye hoped she sounded more confident than she felt. Glancing at Theron for help, she shifted on her feet, feeling somewhat uncomfortable. She grabbed another drink from a passing tray and handed it to Nyxie. "So, uh, you look nice." She complimented quietly. "Still playing princess, I see." She nodded her head in the direction of the crowded room. ~~~~~~~~~~ - Nyxie blinked in surprise. Carefully taking the drink that was being offered. Faye? Wasn't that what her brother and Bea had called her when they were children? The young girl used to hate it. Not that it was any of Nyxie's business any longer. She shoved down the irritation at being called princess easily enough, with all the practice she got at those parties. At least Fayele- Faye was still painfully sincere. Nyxie gave a humorless smile and moved her hand holding the champagne glass in small circles. "I can't exactly ditch all the responsibility that comes with my family name." She had tried doing that before. For years she ran away to the Marlowes when she wanted to hide from her life. It never worked for long. With her privilege came duty, and that was a painful lesson that took her years to learn. If Nyxie wanted to do some good with her family's influence, she had to preserve and cultivate it. - "No," Faye smiled softly. "Of course not." She raised her glass to Nyxie before bringing it to her lips. Looking around the room she spotted Nyxie's mother. Not wanting the woman any closer, she nodded at Nyxie and discreetly pointed. "Looks like duty calls." Downing her drink, she smiled. "Good to see you, Cheeks." Without another word, Faye nodded at Theron and carefully walked away, feeling mildly self-conscious. Running her hands down the sides of her dress, she tried to let her steps steady her nerves as she ducked into a door she hoped led to the restrooms. - Nyxie looked back at Faye's indication, meeting the hard stare of her mother with an unimpressed glare of her own. Of course her mother knew who Faye was and that she would be here. She was most likely holding herself back from crossing the room and trying to take Nyxie away by the arm. She'd broken out a bottle of expensive champagne to commemorate the day Nyxie broke up with Beatrix, literally, when she thought Nyxie had already gone to bed. When she looked back, Faye was already walking away, long braids softly swinging behind her. She didn't even wait for an answer from Nyxie. Her eyes landed on Theron. "Did Caelum mention anything to you about not wanting me to meet Faye?" She asked, barely containing her displeasure. It was becoming awfully clear now, the reason behind all of those near misses and excuses to keep Nyxie away from the lab and the new Maldtech apprentice. Theron knew nothing about who Faye was to Nyxie in specific but he did admit that Caelum had been acting weird whenever Nyxie and Faye were brought up in the same conversation. Nyxie was officially going to have to kill Caelum. Which was a shame, after all, she had so few true, close friends. But maybe… Nyxie glanced in the direction Faye had disappeared in, then shook her head to disperse the silly thoughts and grabbed another drink from a passing waiter. She'd closed that chapter of her life. No more pretty, hot-headed girls from the Marlowes with bright personalities and judgy scowls. Even if it was tempting. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ - "Damn she looked good." Faye leaned against the closed door, bringing a hand up to her face. "Why did she have to look so good?" She asked herself with a frustrated sigh. "Fuck." She had known when applying for the scholarship that she would likely run into her old crush. Beatrix had been sure to pound that thought into her head all summer. Reminding her: "Nyxie thinks she's better than us,Fayelear. Remember that when you see her again, and walk the other way. Or are you better than us now too?" Her sister's voice bounced around her head. She could see and hear Beatrix’s harsh judgments in her mind. "She's gone, Fayelear!" Beatrix seethed in her face. "Stop asking! It's not like she was your girlfriend, why do you even care? Just forget about her." Faye looked up for a moment and could have sworn the reflection looking back at her from the mirror across the room was her smaller 15-year-old self. She missed Cheeks… But she also hated how Nyxie changed her sister. How hurt and angry Beatrix became after Nyxie left. Bea never understood, and she hated that Faye kind of did. Bea could never play the games that Nyxie was going to need to play in order to become the good she wanted to see in the world. Faye understood both sides, and this had only angered her sister more. Their relationship had also suffered because of this. Faye thought she was over it. She thought when she saw Nyxie again it would be fine, she could play the game too, but it turns out it was a little harder to hide from the past than she had hoped it would be. It had hurt, but it didn't change that Faye still wanted her, and it wasn't an option. Even if it was tempting. ~~~~~~~~~