I'm Not In Love

Chapter Eleven

Anna

       We arrived at PRIME together,me and my team in two taxis. We won't be coming together for a while, once school resumed. Summer was also over, but it was proving stubborn to hand over the baton to fall. But I could feel fall in the air however. It was only some minutes before practice.

     The guys and I had a blast at the dorm today, playing and dancing to songs. Ralph made snacks in the afternoon and they were just too good. After that we played games,video games mostly. Apparently, Daniel's dad,own a gaming company that makes games, and we played most of their games. It was really fun with them. Those guys were a whole vibe.

       PRIME was situated in the heart of Sacramento,and this part of Sacramento was really busy and lively.

Beautiful too. With these tall buildings,and the little shops, and tourists everywhere. I still haven't done some sightseeing but so far, I was really amazed. Regardless it was an entirely different environment,I love it here.

     We entered the company,and PRIME was up and running as usual,the whole company in action, everyone on the go. Taking a deep look at the interiors now,it was really rare and nice. The big, tall ceiling in white,and bright chandeliers that could probably buy our whole house back in Florida. White walls,tiled floors. Glass offices and cubicals, everything perfectly designed,one look at all these and you'll know pure magic happens in here.

       There were flat screens on most walls displaying PRIME'S artists in different advertisements,or their music videos. A big banner of Trimix in their awesome handsomeness occupying a wall at the entrance of the building. Those guys were the biggest acts of PRIME,I was sure they meant a great deal around here.

      We saw mob girl again,this time hurrying out of the building with two guys by her side. Probably late for a schedule or who knows, anything could have happened.

    We didn't see Alisa. She could be anywhere at the moment,she is trimix assistant manager after all. She looked like one to be here and there at the same time. She looked like one to have things in charge,and under control. I needed to have a chat with her, if there was any job openings for Amy. If only I could see her today.

      "See the banner for the concert back there,An?", Kate asked.

   "Yeah sure, I did." I replied.

"September 10. That's Seven weeks from now people",she announced again,walking side by side with Daniel.

    I smiled . Kate was worried again. "Kate, we can do this okay. We are barely done with one song just in a day. We'll perfect it today and move on to the next song. Trust, we'll be done before they even know it, okay?"

   She nodded and smiled,"yeah. We can do this"

    I chuckled,"of course babe,we can. Now let's go".

     The boys smiled at us, probably thinking how we just acted.

  Like these two are really something yo.

We took the elevator ride to the fifth floor and went straight to our dance studio. I was getting used to the studio. It was cozy and spacious. I love the blue and red dance and art  graffiti on the walls and the squeaky,clean glass  mirroring us.

     "Dude this place is really big than prexus'. I mean fourty people would fit in here!", Zak yelped laughing. Finally someone figured my thoughts out.

I smiled,seeing eye to eye to what he just said.

     "Yeah man, i mean Levi and the guys at prexus are f*****g missing lots", Tunner Dittoed  that.

    "We really need to officially celebrate this whole thing"  Daniel joined in , slapping Zak's hands for their weird bruh-shake. They were laughing.

   "Yay! Does that means party?" Kate squealed giddily turning from one man to another.

   I palmed my face. They shouldn't have mentioned that to Kate, it would be the next playlist through out today, and she would not give up until we actually did celebrate.

     "Not really party, sweetheart. Just a little fun night to.... uh, um", Daniel was losing the boat, he was sinking.

    "Have fun. Yeah. A little fun night to have fun. Nothing too serious. Just the seven of us."

    Her mouth formed O,and she nodded.

Whew, that was a great safe. Or else I would be forced to go to every boutiques downtown to pick a dress. The location of the party, the foods and drinks , and I'm not doing that. It's the least thing i'ld rather do.

     "Enough brethren. I beseech you to not get laid back and ahead of yourselves. Rather,let's work without weary . Let's work without rest. Let us prove to them that we can do our best. Let's show them that we work as much as they do", Ralph preached in utmost seriousness.

      "Amen" we all said. And went to tackle him, slapping him everywhere. Such a killjoy. He was laughing real hard. He said those things intentionally, and I made to slap him the more but Stephen held me back , carrying me in the waist. He was laughing the more and the others too.

     "I'll get you Laurent. I'll get you for being a kill joy".

   Even Stephen was laughing by now."will you two stop it",he said between chuckles.

    "I'm okay Stephen,I'm okay", I said hand raised to prove sincerity. With that he dropped me.

     "You're such a baby, Anna", Ralph teased again.

Now I went in real raw of anger,and everyone of them rushed to stop me from devouring him. "I'll be twenty in April muh fucker!. You're the baby. Did mummy force you to practice today,Ralph" I whined to him, imitating  Dave,during our last practice with him.

     This got him big time but he laughed it off anyway. We all laughed, remembering that moment.

   "That was some dumb ass s**t, you know. Man ,I miss Dave" Ralph said

   "Yeah,I do too". I replied.

They were all still laughing. And I joined in too. Our plays were mostly like this,the boys would tease us and we would go out for each other. Most times, Ralph and Zak were always starting out fights,but we try our best to avoid that. At the end of the day, we were always still a team.

     Trimix wasn't here yet. I heard they were signing today. Kate and I were so excited,we realised we didn't need signing events to get their autographs,we could easily ask Nick and Nike for one. But not Trap tho.

    "Alright people" I needed decorum,so I waved my hands. I got it, and i continued, " I was thinking,before they come, why don't we work on STRIKE HARD, since we have almost perfected our steps on THREE." I said to them. Another thing I loved so much about them was their submissiveness when it came to dancing. They respect me and do according to what I say. Even if they were older than I was. As I spoke at the moment, they were all focused on me, listening to me and you could never imagine how that made me feel like the queen of the world.

     " Great"

"Alright, let us do that"

     They all responded.

"Alright. Someone should connect the speaker", I said, and that was when I caught a glimpse of something in Ralph's pocket, "can someone warn Ralph not to drop anything on the floor this time!", I screamed.

  "Woah, easy mama",Zak said.

"I won't take it easy if I end up tripping on anyone this time,I promise to rip his skin off, I'll do it ", I said threateningly.

     "Ralph...she's right. Keep your stuffs with you. I don't want any foul drama today ", Stephen said coolly.

    "Yo chill man, I promise I ain't dropping nothing. Trust me.", He raised his hands in scout's honor.

I scoffed.

     Ever since that awkward fall on trap, my mind has been filling in thousands of fallacies. Like this time, Trap definitely hates my guts. And me speaking back to him ...that I would never regret. But what could I do, Trap was my celeb crush, offending him was the last thing I wanted to do. I was hoping maybe we could get over me delaying the meeting the first time, but after that trip on him, I didn't think I would have any chance at him.

Probably do some work to get over thinking stuffs.

    I jumped on the spot,exercising ,anything to distract me. Once the music started, it filled the whole room. It was a good music. We all whooped,while I thought of what steps to go with the beats. Strike hard actually meant not giving up on your dreams,if you think it's right,you should go for it and go big.

    I had an idea,that just clicked. "What if we put in a mixture of dances. Like afro,krump,reverse and.... Daniel,what's that Nigerian dance name ?"I asked Daniel. He actually was an Afro-American,his mum was a Nigerian and so he knew a lot about stuffs over there. He could also play the gongo,shekere and some local instruments. I always found those customs interesting anyway.

    "You mean poco dance?"

"Exactly. The mixture of those dances",I proposed and their face kind of lit up.

"But why?. What made you want to mix dance all of a sudden?", Stephen being the smart  one,asked.

I nodded slightly,"there have been like lots of dance videos on Strike Hard,right?,plus the official video was merely more of reverses and krumps. And this song is Strike Hard,I want us to go big this time, something they aren't expecting, it'll strike so hard they won't see it coming. Plus this beat would go with those dances, trust me"

     "Wow. You went real deep Anna", Daniel said.

      "Way to go mama", Zak said and I only shook my head, smiling.

     They all agreed  too.

"Play the song again and I'll show you", I said, motioning for the speaker.

   I started with afro,rolled my legs fast enough for the beat, quickly I switched into krump. Heaving my steps gently,swaying my legs and my body following suit,when it got to the c****x of the song I switched to legworks and all down to the chorus,reverse took over. As sweet as a candy. They cheered aloud,and clapped. I made them join in ,that way formation would be easy to make. We rehearsed like that for fifteen minutes, Zak making it lively all through.

      Until we heard claps by the door,all heads turned to look. And trimix entered.

      Chris

    "Alisa I promise, I'mma gon' tell you everything I'm about to do,starting now. Everything. Just don't leave,the boys would kill me for making us lose you",Nick pleaded frantically, holding Alisa's hands in his.

        We were in the company's van,this one was specially for Trimix. We just had a rough day with a ton of our fans locally,some even from abroad,cos I heard a lady flew in to Calif from India just to have our autographs. I mean that was crazy,and it meant a lot. Many took selfies and some even videos.

   Plus our photoshoot for Louis Vuitton. We have had little to eat since morning, Alisa was only able to get us hamburgers, sandwiches and yoghurts. I could only chew and watch Nick pleading. Very epic.

     Nick rarely apologized,I didn't know what Alisa was doing to my boy.

     The last and only schedule for today was rehearsal with team Luke. God knows I didn't want to see that girl again, but then what was holding me back from firing her. It didn't matter if her team stayed or not, I just can't have a girl, puncturing my pride carelessly. I mean we have repeatedly changed dancers because I possibly couldn't work with them. But why was I holding back. Why was I not doing anything yet.

         Maybe because the twins would roast me with  "again?!" Or "why would you do that?!" And I hate argument between us. I mean they already like the girl,from day one actually.

      Or maybe something inside of me actually wants to see more of that feistiness of hers when I pushed her button. Or that beautiful face with blue hair and those brown eyes that twinkles when she was laughing. Or the deep dimples that just seemed to get me.

     I shook my head. No - exactly not the latter. Exactly not.

     I was really thrilled somewhere in me in the morning, when I got to the dorm, to drop Scott off and I heard them singing freedom. I didn't know what, but it actually sparked something in me, hearing a group of people sing and dance happily to our song,and Anna's auto voice when she hit my part of the song, real good. I felt fulfilling,and I would admit it,I did smile a little and left immediately before they could see me.

  I shooked my head gently and brushed my styled hair side ways. Better to keep myself distracted ,than think my mind out.

        "We'll kill him, Al. So just please", Nike help put in for Nick, who was now putting up his best pity look at Alisa.

     "Just go Alisa. So i can kill him", I mumbled to her, between sips of my yogurt. Nike hit my leg,and I winced "s**t".

       Alisa giggled. She has actually succeeded at faking a cold shoulder to Nick,this whole time. For the first time. Which made me think,maybe seeing her crush with an hoe,kind of sparked anger,and jealousy,and  maybe some other emotions in her. So maybe she wanted to put him in place this time,using this tactic.

     I grinned at that. Alisa was really something,why wouldn't she just come out clean. Tell him she like him.

I would never understand girls.

"Fine. I will stay." She declared,"But promise, you'll tell me everything you wanna do,okay?. That way it saves me the pressure of being on the edge every time, thinking you could have gotten yourself in trouble".

   Nick jumped at her,"  Thank you thank you. I promise Al. Thank you", he hugged her and she just took it.

  It's not everyday you get your crush to hug you,eh ?.

I scoffed. That did the trick.

   "Thank you Alisa." I said, bit on my hamburger again and looked out the window. For some reason,I never call her Al. I didn't know why. I just like Alisa better.

      "Wanna know who else calls me Alisa?" She asked and that jerked me to look at her.

     "Your mum?, Your dad, your crush?"

"Shut up trap!"she yelled.

I laughed, "who?"

      "Anna"

"Really,barbie calls you Alisa too?", Nike asked,eyes all widened. As if that was the most amazing thing ever.

    "Uh uh...and I heard she tripped on you yesterday during practice. You guys kind of click you know". She said.

"Right. I doubt that", i said .

The boys laughed. "Oooooh"- they teased.

   "Cut the acts dudes.",I shooed them off. "And alisa, calling you your full name doesn't mean anything, probably respect, okay?. No silly jokes about that, please". I warned.

    She chuckled," alright, we'll see to that".

    I eyed them dubiously and scoffed.

The van stopped and the driver announced,"we are here".

   I finished my burgers and yoghurt. Really good. It's been a while since I have eaten real home made food.

     "Thanks Rudolph", Alisa thanked him and a security came to open our door.

     We walked into the company. I, ignoring everyone,while keeping a straight face. I didn't interact much with people here. They have lots of rumors about me already. Some said I was probably born in Alaska,with these ice cold vibes I passed. Some said I was a gay,cause I was never spotted with women. I didn't care about criticism,I just minded my business. Nick and Nike  greeted a few people. Alisa too.

       We met Starr on the way. I groaned.

  She was beautiful and all,but she could be real slutty and bitchy too. Always didnt even pay attention to her,she could have some dignity and not make herself into some kind of lowlife. Really. So much for being a celebrity

    She was twenty-five,at the peak of  her life and all she did was chase after Nick.

     Don't get me wrong, I wasn't jealous that a girl was worshipping my friend like a deity,a pretty big celeb at that. It was just so gross,stooping so low and not having standard. Not to mention the b***h you-can-go-to-hell dressings of hers. Even now,she was wearing a short, white,tight dress, with tiny straps. Barely covering anything, her boobs were almost in full show.

       The annoying thing was Alisa was never comfortable with that,she always tried to play her cool,or either leave them alone and Nick was just stupid to not know anything. Alisa wouldn't let us tell him,either.

    Ain't love just messed up.

  "Nick!", She screamed and hugged Nike into the elevator.

     "I'm Nike,Starr", Nike said.

And we all stifled laughters. Her face flushed. And she quickly pushed his sleeves up and couldn't find any tattoo,and she didn't notice ,he wasn't wearing earrings.

   "s**t", she cursed and jumped back to Nick."I'm sorry sweet.", She cooed to him.

     "It's been years Starr,you still can't differentiate the twins. And you think you have a chance?...tsk tsk. Real bad", I whined and chuckled.

      "Don't listen to him Nick. I know you real well. I just wanted to make you laugh you know", she laughed so loud, "isn't that funny".

    The elevator closed and started lifting us to the fifth floor . Alisa was staying at the back with me, kicking her pink heel at the floor gently,tapping her fingers on the bar rod by the wall and looking everywhere except them. She was nervous,again?.

     Starr locked her arms seductively with Nick's." So sweet, say dinner for tonight. Lasagne?, Pasta?, chicken?".

    "No".

She pouted. And I smiled.

    Ha, take that witch.

By now Alisa had calmed down but I was sure she was still restless on the inside.

     " How about a nice date, you know the theater,the aquarium..what do you wanna do"

     "This". Nick said. Pressed a button by the door and the elevator door opened at the fourth floor and he pushed her out.

  " Hey watch the butt, it's the fakes,might fall off you know" I teased

    We all laughed and waved her bye.

She was yelling and screaming,"I'll be back Nick!. I will be back for you!". Her voice echoed into the elevator.

We reached our floor and the door opened. While we walked down the hallway to the studio,we were hearing faint beats of Strike Hard.

     "Are they dancing to it, c'mon guys!", Nike waved us over.

  We stood by the door to see them dancing.

Anna was dancing, gloriously. She seemed free and fearless. She looked like one to take up the stage on her own, make it hers and leave you struck with awe.

    She had dyed her hair to pink,and that...that looked amazing on her. She was really beautiful,she was laughing too,and those dimples were there ,like they were calling me. She was doing her thing ,at the same time,having fun.

I was taking her in since no one was noticing me. Anna was short,but her slim and smart figure didnt make her all that short. She looked nice, sporting a grey, colored top, a short black tight,which exposed smooth and inviting skin,that went down into a white kicks. She wore few bangles in her wrists and tiny sparkling earrings.

    She was pretty even when she wasn't over-dressed. And that pink hair again, that she had put up in a neat bun. Seemed like she did that a lot when she danced, probably to stop it from getting in the way when she danced.

      "She dyed her hair,my barbie",Nike burbled.

   We all exchanged looks at him,my look was kind of penetrating a lot,and I didn't know why.

  I turned back to them,her team had already joined her,all dancing together. They were doing a dance mix which was really cool. How could they have thought of that?

    People rarely do dance mix.

A lot of them made mistakes for a while. They were doing afro, krump,reverse dances... But I can't seem to figure out the last one. It made sense, like good one. We stood for about fifteen minutes watching them and all the way Nick and Nike and Alisa were smiling all through. I didn't know I hard a grin on my face until Alisa snapped me off.

      And they walked in clapping.

"What was that?!" Nick asked still clapping.

       "That... was beautiful!", Nike answered

     They were all smiling.

"Hi", Anna greeted. The rest of them did too.

      My poker face was back.

"You all looking good"- Nick said

     "Yeah.. And sorry we're late. We got held up,you know",Nike apologized.

     They all nodded.

"And I must say your hair looks amazing", Nike had to say, grinning from ear to ear.

     She smiled, more like blushed.

"Now you look more like barbie. All you need now is a pink ball gown,and shimmering heels. Maybe some tiaras too"

      She would really look great in those - I thought.

      "I'm not that type of girl. I like my jeans and shorts better."-she said,shyly.

    "Oh..tomboy,eh?", Nick said.

  Alisa and I only watched them talk. She was more smiley though. But I have nothing to smile about. I wasn't going to smile to them, it would bring down my guard and they would want to talk to me. And I didn't want any of that.

       She didn't say anything.

Maybe she was a tomboy. But she was a cool one. But then something was telling me, she wasn't. A tomboy still wouldn't look as girly and cute as she was. She could probably be one of those girls who grew up loving shorts and sneakers.

    " How was the signing event", Anna asked.

    "Pretty co..", Nike was saying

"Oh, can we get autographs too. Pretty please?!", the other girl squealed giddily.

She looked pretty too. A little taller than Anna, wearing a black pant and a short blue top, and some boot. She looked a diva, with those makeup on her.

     I didn't get to study her yesterday, I guess I had my head somewhere else.

  But their boys did got my attention, they looked like a whole bunch of vibe. They were real dancers, they knew when to work and when to have fun.

Most especially Zak, there was more of him yesterday, making jokes when we

tried to cool it off. Her seemed to take things less seriously and just vibe a lot.

     Nick and Nike signed on Anna's headphone and Kate, as she was called, on her boot. Weird girl.

     "Alisa", one of the boys called and they turned to her.

" Hi everyone", she greeted and came from behind me."how is living in the dorm coming"

    "Pretty great",Kate yelped. She's got some real up to the sky energy

"Awesome", Zak added

    "We have our own dancing court in the backyard ", Anna said. I noticed her dimples and her eyes lightning up.

  "Don't forget the big kitchen, people. I feel like a five star chef", Ralph said.

    I was getting to know them. This is what I do mostly, when I didn't speak. I observe. I listened and I studied people. I got to know them a lot when they spoke. I was already knowing lots of them, except this tall guy amongst them that wasn't talking much. Like he wasn't speaking at all. And was acting, unbothered, uninterested like me.

    I jammed my hands in my pocket and sighed.

   He was not like me. No one was. He could be silent for all I care but he would have never been through what I had been through.

    I got all their names as they chat on. Tunner was the  flirty one. Ralph was the one who eat a lot,the dumb one who threw the cookie wrap on the floor yesterday. Zak ,I knew Zak was the funny bone. Daniel was Kate's boyfriend,he was an African American. And Stephen was the eldest, twenty three.

     They were all younger than I , seeing I would be thirty in some few months. Ugh,I feel old.

      "What about you Stephen. Ya pretty quiet over there", Alisa asked him.

    He shifted gently away from the wall, and broke a faint smile, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly, " it's cool. Been taking care of these kids, and as you can see,they are fine. Haven't burnt the house down, yet"

      I grinned. Wasn't expecting that though.

They all laughed and smacked him playfully.

    Alisa giggled at that. "I guess there has been lots of magic going on with you guys. I'll leave you for now,just came to check up on you", she said.

    "Thank you", Anna said,"can I see you for a bit, Alisa?", She asked and Alisa shared me a playful stare that so much meant, told ya she calls me Alisa.

     I rolled my eyes at that. And they left the room.

     The rest of the boys were chatting with Nick and Nike, occasionally trying to involve me in their conversation, which didn't go well, cause I was making few and short remarks. They were cool and all,but they would still go if they stepped on my feet. I didn't want disrespect, I have learnt enough to know when you engage too much with kids, they disrespect, and I wouldn't take that.

     When Anna strode in without Alisa, smiling from ear to ear. I figured she didn't do anything wrong, she was staying after all.

     Just because she didn't do anything.

Just because. Nothing else.

    When she came in, she announced we start rehearsal immediately. She wasn't going to tell me what to do ,but because, really, time wasn't on our side,and we needed to perfect Three,I joined them.

    Giving her a scoff before we started.

Practice went on and on for about one and some minutes hours. We made sure we perfect our steps on THREE and the formation they made.

It was really cool and every steps and moves just seemed to click with the fast beat of the song. I guess they were pros after all.

Every now and then I stole some glances at her from every angle. No one knew,she didn't know too.

    Not that there was anything interesting to see,or unveil,she just seemed like one to have lots of cool sides to her.

     She was outgoing and she smiled a lot, occasionally putting back errand strands in place. But it was her seriousness when she was dancing,and her captainness when she was bossing her team to focus and do it right that made her independent,feisty at the same time cute.

     I have got to get myself together, it didn't matter if she was cute or not, she had punctured my pride twice and I, trap wouldn't take that. She was only a dancer ,not of great importance to me. I ain't letting anyone in anymore. That was how it had always been. I sealed myself,no one came in, no one hurt me. It ain't gonna change this time.

     Practice ended and I heard them rambling on about how they were going to celebrate their contract with prime. As if it was a big deal to be in prime.

    Well,to them, I guess it was their biggest gig so far.

    And they wanted Trimix present.

I made a smirk.

They don't expect to come,right.

I was only going to cruise in the cottage and that was it.

    "That's nice,we really should celebrate your win guys", Nike and his almighty niceness said. He seemed to actually like these guys a lot. They never bond with the past dancers this way.

    "We'll love to come, right trap?"

Oh Nick did not just ask me that

    "No".I said and looked away,while I drank water.

He smiled, he did that intentionally. I'll kill him for that. The rest of them looked hurt.

    I didn't care.

"Thing is,we we're planning on hanging out tonight in the cottage. You know,chill out,drink and joke. It's how we cool our heads off.", Nike explained.

    "Cool. We'll do it tonight on the court". Ralph said,"there will be foods and booze , music, games,s**t to while away time."

        "Sounds fun to me. Will you still come with us trap", Nick asked.

I can definitely hear the mock in his tone. Bastard.

    "No." I said again.

"Is this about me?", Anna spoke to me for the first time today. Seems like she's been trying to all day, I looked at her confusedly. "Look, if you're been this way because of me, I'm sorry okay. They didn't do anything,so at least can you be nice to them".

      Fine,I didn't want to talk to her, because she's been rude to me twice,but me not talking with the rest of them was solely because I didn't talk with people. I tried to not get close to them. So she was clearly off track. I wanted to say but she cut me off again.

    "I didn't mean to say those things yesterday. We are going to be here for two years and it already started awkward,and I can't seem but think it's my fault. I'm so..."

   I wouldn't let her apologise, and make me look like the bad guy here.

    "No. It's not you. You just don't know me.", I said clearly,avoiding each of their gaze. "I'll be in the cottage". I told the twins and left the studio. I heard the twins apologized and promised to be at their little party  before running to meet me.

       "Really trap, ya gon' be like this", Nick said

"Please. I don't want any of this,let me be", I said calmly. Tousled my hair roughly and sighed. We left for the cottage in silence. I don't want to hear them whine and defend the girl again,it was making me feel like they cherish her than our friendship.

    The girl was driving me crazy,she just made me feel guilty,but she never knew me. She never knew that I just kept to myself,and I didn't like making friends,except the  twins. The twins knew me, they knew me in and out. And that was all,I didn't want too much in my circle.

    I really was going to crash in booze and drinks this night. She has done it again, it was the second time I would be drinking myself out because of her.

Fuck that s**t.