The Book Fight

SEKANI I didn’t watch Harry Potter or Star Trek or Star Wars growing up. I didn’t watch Alien movies or anything to do with magic or fiction because I wasn’t a believer. My mother didn’t read me Disney princess story books at bedtime or dressed me like them for Halloween. I was always people like Charlie’s Angels, Aretha Franklin and even Princess Diana at one time. She read me The Art of War as a bedtime story and enrolled me in martial art classes the moment I learned how to walk. She wanted me to be strong physically and emotionally. “You are woman, powerful and strong.” She’d remind me, “you don’t need a man to save you.” She’d scold every time I’d ask about the princess books, my cousins told me about. So losing her, felt like that part of me died with her. Growing up without a mother was not only hard but it made me an outcast for some reason. I was teased a lot because my father didn’t know how to do my hair or dress a 13-year-old girl. We were both a mess and things didn’t look good for the Rivers family. Well, that was until I found the Basic Instructions notebook. I was walking home from school upset because I had just beaten-up Greg Macy for teasing me and gotten in trouble. I had a letter from my teacher to pass to my father. It was my 3rd one that month and I was getting close to being expelled. I was about to cross the road when something shiny blinded me in a bush. I assed and found a leather notebook with a mirror bookmark. At first I thought it was someone’s diary but as I continued to read it, I realized that it was full of basic instructions to everything. From how to study smarter to get better grades. To how to talk to people and make friends. It had chapters on how to dress according to one’s personality and how to save and use money wisely. It had hairstyle tutorials for every hair texture and my favorite, how to heal and move on. The leather notebook was thick, colorful and had stickers everywhere. Just reading it made me feel like I wasn’t alone and at the back it had lank pages to note down progress and tips, that I used it as a diary. The Basic Instructions Notebook was my greatest possession and it changed my life. I just didn’t know how dependent I was on it, till I lost it. ASTON I was 15years old when it happened. It was after the Homecoming game. My brother Peetah and I were getting ready for the school dance while our parents had dinner downstairs. They say because I had a few drinks after the dance that I saw things. They said maybe I blacked out and dreamt it all but I know the truth. I saw it all. He was having a seizure. Something was wrong with him and his screams could be heard from all over the house. When I finally reached him, he wasn’t screaming anymore. He wasn’t moving either. He was actually dead. My brother Peetah had no ounce life in him as foam left his mouth. I begged, screamed, prayed and cried but still, he didn’t move. The police said he was taking something and overdosed. My parents said I needed to let him go after some time passed but I couldn’t—he was my big brother and best friend. After a year of recurring nightmares and forcing me to go to therapy. Mother called it and moved us from the suburbs of New York City to a town across country in the middle of nowhere—America. The nightmares went away but the pain didn’t budge. .It was obvious that when Peetah died, I died with him. I changed for the worst after we moved because I honestly didn’t care anymore. I was no longer the Parker ‘golden boy’ I was in the city. I started to dress in dark colors and take extra pills just to sleep. I have only been at my new school for a year and I only go for my mother’s sake. I hide the pot and pills from my father so he doesn’t lose his sh*t like he did when he saw my tattoo. It’s been more than 2years now since my brother’s passing. One year in this snore fest town called Rooksville and our 2nd year starts in week along with my senior year. When summer started, instead of a divorce like I expected. My parents told me they were having another baby and needed me to get it together for it. I was happy for them but I didn’t know how to do it. I didn’t know how to move on or continue like they did. I was dead or at least I thought I was until I read the Basic Instructions book and everything changed. I began to change.