Remember

Chapter 5: Remember again

Chapter 5: Remember again

-Flask back-

"How old are you again?" the middle aged man from behind the counter asked, I'm sure he told me his name earlier but I forgot.

"Eighteen," I mumbled. He looked me over for what must have been the tenth time before rolling his eyes and leaning on the counter and smirking at me.

"Alright miss 'eighteen', what can I get you?"

"Whats the strongest you got?"

He then scoffed at me and moved off the counter to start making my drink. I stared at him as he reached under his workstation, pulling out several bottles and a single shot glass, only to roll my eyes at his failing attempt to impress me as he unnecessarily threw bottles of alcohol in the air caught them in his hands before they hit the ground. "Here yah go eighteen, the strongest in the house," he stated before placing the glass in front of me.

I stared at it.

There it was... the liquid that made my father the way he is, the liquid my mom uses a an excuse to justify his actions, the liquid that make him---.

Maybe I shouldn't if I do this I'll be running away from my problems instead of solving them,

I'd be like him.

I sighed heavily and shifted in my seat, flinching when a sharp pain from my lower back struck me.

Then again he does seem a lot happier than me.

I hesitantly grasped the eight once cup and stared at it for a little longer.

What am I doing?

Oh right trying to forget.

"Hey eighteen how long you gonna glare at the cup," the bartender chuckled.

"Don't worry about it," I grumbled.

Maybe I should just go.

Go? Go where? Back to that house where bad things happen?

Yes that house, where else?

I have nowhere to go, no one to help me... maybe I should just forget

Forget What? Sean?

That's right Sean, he's always there... but what about his mom, no his dad,..... Their right he's way out of my league?

Sean is not his parents, but it's not like his mom was completely wrong... in fact she was right about everything.

That's no reason to drink, that's no reason to be like him.

But what if Sean found out about what I am, about what my dad does to me.....he wouldn't want me...I don't even want me. I'm disgusting, he made me disgusting.

....................................................

I swallowed back the vomit that threatened to escape my lips as I placed my forehead on the counter in front of me. I sniffed at the surface I was resting on and gaged at that awful yet undistinguishable scent that was emitting from it.

Is it baby farts or the devils urine? I pondered. It was when I heard a low whistle coming from over my head that I looked up and shifted my attention from the counter toward the source of the noise.

"Okay eighteen I'm actually getting worried about you and I'm an asshole... Really ask the last three chicks who got totally hammered on the account of my drinks."

I looked up at him and then back at what must have been my fifth drink. I shrugged my shoulders before taking another sip. My head feels funny. I sat up from the slouching position I was in earlier and pushed my drink away from me. "You’re the devil in a cup," I mumbled.

"Excuse me?"

A disgruntled slur left my lips before I turned to glare at him.

"I said f**k off Tim,"

His eyes narrowed a little, probably because I got his name wrong, he was about to reply before he stopped himself with a heavy frustrated sigh.

"A soft answer-"

"Leaves you bloodied and beaten half to death," I finished for him. Wide eyes stared back at me, and he simply replied to my bitter comeback with an uncomfortable chuckle.

"You're something different eighteen,"

I gave him a curt nod and downed the rest of the liquid in my glass. Another low whistle escaped from him and shot him a glare. He held his hands up in mock surrender before awkwardly patting my head.

"I'm just looking out for yah, my good deed for the day,"

Good deed huh? Please

I smacked his hand away from me shoved my empty glass in his face in an effort to get a refill from him.

"Okay kid you've forced my hand," he stated giving a small smirk, "If you want more you gotta pay for the ones you've already drank."

Shit

I immediately straightened up and forced a smile.

"Uhm how about I wash your dishes as payment,"

He then rolled his eyes before waving me off.

"Nah forget it just cool it with the alcohol"

I nodded my answer sheepishly, before he gave me a curt nod in response. With that he walked away from me to serve another customer and I let out a breath I didn't even know I was holding.

"That's the first time I ever saw him look out for someone, you must really be something,"

I turned to my right to get a good look at him.

"And you are?"

"No one important," he replied.

I snorted at his cheesy comment before shaking my head and turning around.

"Smooth one double O seven, but if you can't tell me about your secret identity I think it’s in both of our best interest if you not talk to me."

It was when I said this he let out a hearty laugh and the hood of the hoodie he was wearing slid back revealing his face. Piercing blue eyes met my green ones as he smirked at me.

"A feisty one aren't we, alright I get yah no name no convo,"

I nod my head slowly as I stared at him dumbfounded.

This guy is beautiful

"The names Derek," he said while giving me a toothy grin.

.-End of flash back-

I pulled my knees up to my chest and fingered my hand into the sheets on my bed.

"I can't remember telling him,”

Only stupid little fragments of that night keep popping up in my head and none of them are useful.

I hugged my legs tighter and buried my head further into my knees.

I couldn't have told him.

With one last frustrated groan I climbed off my bed and walked toward the other side of the room to get my phone from my night stand.

No texts from Sean, he must be pissed at me for ditching him earlier today. I quickly dialed his number, but cleared the screen before turning off my phone. I stared at the blank screen for a while before a bitter laugh escaped from my lips.

He deserves better than me.

I then threw my phone on my bed and turned my attention to the window. After spending some time deliberating on a particular idea in my head I decided I needed my phone after all and retrieved it before climbing through my bed room window.