Of Dark & Light: Acceptance

Chapter Sixteen

Amara POV

                Eventually, the crazy doctor came and went after asking me lots of questions mainly about how I feel and what is going on in my head. In which I started laughing as Lillie took it upon herself to answer all the questions for me. The Psych eventually told her she needed to step out of the room and wait till after she was done with me. Haha, it was actually really amusing. She has gotten pretty bossy. Which is so mom of her. For a girl that feels of light and calming the girl, she can really be to the point and intimidating. The doctor asked if I was actually ready to be in charge of her because of this. I laughed and said yes. She signed off it and walked out.

                Lillie was with Jackie and Dr. Minx going over stuff before coming in to hand me discharge papers. I took this chance to start getting dressed. Lillie and Miss Millie had brought me some clothing. Luckily it was comfy clothing and stuff I would actually wear. I have Comfy grey sweats and a matching black and grey crop hoody, It cut off about an inch or so under my chest. The best part of the outfit my favorite Vans mom got me. Luckily I had taken them off in the garage that night. I always took my shoes off in the garage and put my fuzzy slippers on to go into the house. I took no chance of Max eating my shoes. He had a habit of making my shoes his new chewy toys. These were too nice to even risk it. I was pulling the hoody on over my head when I heard the door open and felt him surround me. Over the last few days, I started feeling everyone more. Jamie felt like the wood and safe. Weird combo, right?

                I liked it though. “oh s**t! I am so sorry Mari. I didn’t know you were getting dressed!” he started backing up. I felt embarrassment flow off of him in waves. I started laughing and turned around as I finished pulling the cropped hoody down. “Jamie it is fine. You have seen me in much less.” Speaking of the “cloth” shirt he hated so much. “Yeah, that thing I'm glad got burned in the fire.” He said in an annoyed voice. “yeah whatever. We both know you actually liked that shirt.” “Mari that was NOT a shirt. It was a cloth and it… I… well okay I liked it but I hated other guys gawking at you in it….” Again embarrassment waved off of him. I smiled with a giggle. “did you need something? Minus walking in on me naked?”

                “Ummm no…yes…” “well which is it yes or no?” he looked me in the eyes and smiled. Next thing I knew he was in his pockets and was rattling out a set of keys. I instantly perked up. Matching his smile. “No…stop it! You brought her!!!!” tears began to fall down my face. Tossing over the keys to me I caught them instantly. “yup.” He said popping the p. I screamed so excitedly. Causing him to block his ears laughing. He was the only one though. Because within seconds here comes Lillie, Mrs. Millie, Dr. Minx, and Jackie running to me. Asking if I am okay and what happened. Until I lifted my Baby’s keys and dangled them in front of everyone. “GOD AMARA! You just gave us a heart attack thinking something was happening to you! What the hell!” Lillie screamed at me. “Sweetheart you just spent 4 years in a coma… maybe we should ease you back into driving. You can drive the wagon home.” Mrs. Millie said calmly.

                The shock was written all over me. “What! No! Come on! I have already missed 4 years of baby! Plus driving her is like riding a bike. You never forget how to drive her.” I say in a panic. “It's okay I will be with her. I promise. Let her have this. If she can not handle it ill have her pull over and I will drive…” Jamie started to say. “Jamie like hell! I got this I swear!” then I felt a pull. He was talking to me through my mind. Mental slap. Will this girl shut up I am trying to help her… wait no, not to me but about me…how is he doing that? Or… am I doing that? Am I hearing Jamie? I mean I had felt me feeling his word before but I hadn’t actually heard his voice… I tried to hear him again and nothing…maybe I just am crazy… and I knew what he would say… yeah that is it.

                “Mari…” I snap back to reality and notice everyone looking at me with concern… “hey you good? Where di you go?” Jackie speaks up. “Umm yeah, I just… yeah no I am okay. Really. Please guys let me try to drive her. I need this.” “I do not see any issue with her driving as long as Jamie is with her. He will be able to see any signs of complications of the coma.” Dr. Minx said with a wink at me. “Fine… but please Amara come straight to Mrs. millies. Matty is actually setting up a dinner. Bro has turned into quite the chef.” She said with a smile. I agreed with her to get her off my back. We will have to figure out how to shift the parent dynamic back over to me soon. I want her to be a teenager, not mine and Matty’s caregiver. That is not fair to her.

                Dr. Minx and Jackie start my discharge instructions. Along with telling me all of my future appointments and if there are any changes to please come see them as soon as possible. The thing is there were changes. So many of them but none that the doctors could explain or help me with. They were all changes that I had to work through. “Here you go, Amara.” Dr. minx said as he handed me my papers. Holding on to the papers I felt everyone’s worry and happiness and… sadness. I could understand why everyone felt that way but I was ready. I needed answers and those answers would have to start in Parker. I was not going to tell Lillie or anyone that is where I planned on going to from the hospital. I am sure that Jamie would notice quickly when I stopped following Mrs. Millie in the wagon.

                I was ready for that fight with him though. Nothing was going to stop me. I have been feeling mom and dad and I knew that they needed me to come back to the house. Or what was left of it. So that is what I was going to do. Along with going to mom's garden. I needed to see if there was something there under the flowers. Something meant for me. “Hey! You ready?” Lillie said snapping me out of the thoughts running around in my head. “Yeah! Let's go. I am so ready to get the hell out of here!” everyone laughed at me and started to walk out in front of me. Which was fine I needed to text Matty. I know that he was making this big dinner for me but I needed to be somewhere else.

Amara

                Hey Matty! I am only going to tell you something but you are not allowed to tell Lillie until later okay?

Matty

                Yeah okay! Wait did you not get discharged? Ugh. I waited to start cooking just in case.

Amara

                No! I totally got discharged.

                Just umm can you wait on the food? Maybe tomorrow night or Wednesday?

Matty

                I mean yeah I can? But why?

Amara

                I'm going to parker…

Matty

                Mari pick me up! I want to go with you please!

Amara

Not this time okay. I need to do this. So please dont tell on me. I need this. Jamie will be with me. don’t worry I know where the hide a key is so ill crash and Mrs. Millies house okay?

Matty

                Ugh fine… I understand but mari… Lillie is going to hate this…

                I got your bk tho. I wont tell her. Just let me know when you get there okay?

Amara

                Thnx matty.

                Don’t worry I will send a text when I get to parker or around then. I love you Matty.

Matty

                I

“Hey. Who are you texting?” Lillie’s voice snaps my head up from my phone. Ha! We are already walking into the lobby finally. “Just Matty. Saying thank you for dinner tonight.” I say quickly. Jamie’s side glance did not go unnoticed by me and Mrs. Millie. “Oh okay. Well, he is making a bunch of food, so I hope you are starving.” She said with a giggle. “Definitely.” I try to say without a stutter. I hate lying to her, but I have no choice. She would throw a tantrum and jump in the back seat of baby until I drove to the apartment, they have been renting for the last 4 years. So I had to lie. We get to the doors and Jamie stops me and grabs the keys and starts running out the door yelling “Mari wait right here ill be right back!” I couldn’t help but laugh as Lillie looked ready to yell at him. Hahaha.

“What is he doing? I thought we all agreed you could drive her?” Lillie said questionably. “Oh, Lillie it is for effect for her.” Mrs. Millie said with humor. “It's just a car… no need to get all dramatic.” She said with a snide tone. My head snaps at her in shock. “You. Did. Not. Just. Say that. She is NOT just a car.” Emphasizing every word to her. I can not believe she just said that about baby! “Potato patato” she shrugged out. I can not right now. But I reframe from even trying with this lost cause. You can not even try to get a non-car person into cars. Understanding the feeling you get when it rumbles under your foot into your hands and into your very soul. It is not her fault though.

I was about to tell her never mind when I heard her rumble. The vibration of Baby from the parking lot. She was waking up and coming to me. I slowly ignored my sister and Mrs. Millie and walked out the glass sliding doors to find her beautiful sound. That is when I saw her. Jamie is in the driver's seat. Guiding her every move to me. She sounded amazing. Clearly, Jamie kept up her maintenance while I was in a coma. I watched with the biggest smile on my face as she pulls in front of me.  I did not even realize I was crying until Jamie came out and grabbed my hand and spoke “Mari… are you okay?” I shook my head yes. I was okay. I was better than okay. I had a part of me again. That is when I saw dad in the back seat with a smile on his face. Urging me to get in the driver's spot. I instinctively started walking to the driver's seat.

Opening the door I sat down gripping the wheel and looking in the rearview mirror at dad. Winking at him and then turning my head at Jamie who was standing near the passenger side and smiled up at him. “You getting in?” I said with excitement. With that, he jumped into the passenger seat and shut the door. “Let's go.” He smiled at me. Tunnel vision hit me as I turned my head to the road and guided baby in first, releasing the clutch and hit the gas leaving Mrs. Millie and Lillie in the background. I could see Lillie’s face with anger as the clutch went back down and I put her in second. Getting her up onto 10 east to Arizona. Nothing else mattered and all I saw was the road.