Following my parents' steps(SQ:The good girl is changing me)

Chapter seven - Memories

Skyler's POV:

I hate Missy and Nicky so much. Just because they are a golden couple of the school, it doesn't mean that they can do whatever they want. I don't understand what is their problem with me. I haven't done anything to them. If dad was there, I knew that he would do something. I don't know who are Nicky's parents, but he seemed very proud of them, which is not something bad. Anyways, I hope that they will leave me alone. Is this why Blake wanted me to leave him alone? I wasn't treating him the way Missy and Nicky treated me. Maybe I have to accept that he doesn't like me and move on. I don't think that he will tell me whatever it is. I don't know why it got me so much, but I wanted to know why he is so cold with me. I will accept it only if I have done something to him. Yes, in school, not many people like me, but this is because they are jealous. That is the only explanation, which I have. Blake is different. He is not ignoring only me. He does this with everyone who tries to get closer to him. It's visible that someone has hurt him, but I don't understand what the rest of the people have to do with that. We are not guilty of his problems. I wish that there was a way in which I could help him. I want him to understand that not all people are the same. There are good ones who will care for him. Just like his parents. If he let me, I gladly would do that. 

I woke up in the morning with the thought of Blake. Two days ago, he was nice to me and looked like he cares. I don't know was it real or just pretending, but the feeling was nice. I know that he wants to know some things about me, but what is the point when he won't share anything. I won't tell everything to a stranger. Yes, he is exactly that. Just because we have talked for a while, it doesn't mean that we are friends. Moreover, he doesn't want me around so it's clear that we can't be anything. 

I got out of bed and started getting ready. When I was done, I walked downstairs for breakfast. There was no one. I went to my parents' room and saw that they were sleeping. On the clock, which was on the nightstand, I saw that it's only 6 am. Why did I wake up so early? I might look like a creep, but I watched how my parents sleep for a while. They can't stay away from each other even for five minutes. Mom will survive, but I am not sure about dad. My parents always cuddle when they sleep, which I think that it's cute. I wish that I had someone with who I can do this. It's not like I don't do it with dad, but it's different. He is my parent and this is something normal. I want someone who will love me the same way dad loves mom. 

Since it's too early, I decided to go out. I wrote a note and left it on the kitchen table. I didn't use my money yesterday so with these, which I got today, I have forty dollars. They will be enough for one small breakfast in a diner. I walked to the nearest one and ordered eggs with bacon. I looked around for a table and saw someone. It was Blake. I didn't know that he comes here or to any place where are people. I took my food and sat in front of him. He gave me an annoyed look, but I didn't say anything and started eating my food. 

- Won't you leave me alone? There are many free tables. 

- True, but with the company is better. Now eat or the food will get cold. 

- I will eat when I want. 

- Ok, good. At least I don't want cold food. 

He didn't say anything and continued eating his breakfast. We stayed in silence for a while. To be honest, I don't know what to tell him. I find it very hard to talk with him. Especially when he is not in the mood. Soon he looked at me and started laughing. What now? He is changing his moods like he is changing his clothes. I don't understand him. 

- Will you stop laughing?

- No, I won't. 

- Why?

- Because you have egg yolk all over your face. 

- I won't fall for this. 

He didn't say anything and opened the camera on his phone. He wasn't lying. I feel embarrassed. I quickly cleaned my face, but this only made him laugh harder. Damn it! Well, I can have my benefits from this. 

- So now I am not that annoying. 

- Who said that?

- You didn't tell me to go away. 

- I...

- What? Don't pretend. I know that you don't hate me. 

- I never said that. 

- But you didn't deny it either. 

- I hate you. 

- You wish. The truth is that you like me. A lot more than you'll admit. 

- Only in your dreams. 

- You have no idea what is going on there. 

With that, he looked at me surprised. I know what he is thinking. After all, I wanted to give him something. Nothing of this is true, but he doesn't need to know that. I went to pay for my breakfast and both of us walked to school. Most of the time, I was talking, but at least there was something, which I can call conversation. When we arrived at school, each of us walked on our way. I won't lie that I would love to continue talking with him, but maybe now is not the time. If I want him to trust me, first, I have to make him feel comfortable around me. I will stop asking him about what has happened and let him do it when he feels ready. 

On the lunch break, I went to take food and sat at one table. To my surprise, Blake came and sat in front of me. I gave him a look, but he didn't say anything and started to eat. I smiled to myself and started with my food as well. 

- Don't think that this will happen every day. 

- I never said that. 

- You just have the luck that today I am in a good mood. 

- I am honored. - I said and he chuckled

I don't know what is the reason for his good mood today, but I won't lie that I am happy. I prefer the happy Blake instead of the go away and leave me alone Blake. I know that they are the same person, but when he is happy, he is himself. I think that he avoids people on purpose. I don't know how I can make him understand that not everyone is bad, especially the girls. Ok, some girls are or to say that they act badly with other people, but not all are like that. I am starting to think that a girl has hurt him. 

- Can I know why you are in a good mood?

- I don't know. Just no one has irritated me yet. 

- Neither me? I am surprised. Usually, no matter what I do, I always irritate or annoy you. 

- Yes, but not today. 

- Then I guess that I should do it. 

- Do it and I will kill you. - he said, which made me laugh

I gave him puppy eyes and saw a smile. A real smile. I have never seen one. Not when it comes to him. I have to admit that he needs to smile more. 

- You need to smile more often. 

- It's not easy. 

- Why? Because no one made you. I did it successfully.

- No, how I said, you have the luck that I am in good mood. 

With that, his mood changed. I looked at him and saw the pain in his eyes. Did I say something? I don't understand. No matter what I do, I always mess up things. The rest of the lunch break, we spent in silence. Later we walked to our class but didn't talk. He even refused to sit next to me. Sometimes or to say most of the time, I can't understand him. 

After school, I walked home. I almost walked through my brother who said that he is going out with his friends. I won't lie that sometimes I am jealous of him. He has found good friends with who he spends a lot of time. I, from the other side, couldn't find anyone. Maybe the problem is in me. I walked to the office and saw that my parents are working. I stayed there for a while and then walked to my room to get changed. Today, I am not in a perfect mood so one shower should be good. I walked into the shower and let the hot water do its work. With that, thoughts came to my mind. I have to admit that I have thought about Blake as the possible person who I want, but with him, everything will be mission impossible. The only thing that I can say about him is that he looks good. I don't know anything else about him. Well, if he tells me something, but I don't see that happening. 

When I was done, I walked downstairs to my parents’ room. They have one box in their wardrobe, which they have had for years. Since a little girl, I love to play hide and seek with my dad. Sometimes I was hiding in their wardrobe. The box was still there. I never opened it, because I didn't want to. Back then, it was not something interesting. Now, I want to know what is inside. I carefully opened the door and walked into their room. I took the box out of the wardrobe and sat in front of it, on the ground. On the top, it was written "Memories". I opened the box and saw many letters, photos, and much more things. I took out one photo album and started looking at the pictures. I guess that this is their first one. There was a picture from their prom. I have to admit that both of them were looking amazing. In every picture, they were smiling like they are the only people in the world. 

- Why can't I be this happy? - I said to myself

Later, I found a napkin with two lines on it. I have no idea why this is here. I mean who would keep this. Let's hope that it's not used. Then I clicked it. In my parents' first book, this is how the main characters talk for the first time. Through a napkin. 

- I can't believe that you still keep this. 

- How can't I? This was the first time you said something to me.

I looked up and saw my parents. I might be in trouble. It's not polite to look at things, which are not yours. 

- Look, I'm sorry, I just got curious and...

- I don't need explanations. Let's sit. I have many things to show you. - mom said

Mom showed me all the albums, which she keeps. How can someone be so happy? I know how many things have happened to them, especially in high school, but their smiles never left. I felt tears in the corners of my eyes but blinked a couple of times to make them go away. 

- Honey, are you ok?

- Yes, I just thought of something. 

- If you want, we can stop.

- No. Can you tell me about your first date? I mean do you have pictures. 

- I have some. There they are. 

My parents’ love life looks like it's from a fairytale. They might have had problems, but there is always a happy ending. Look at them now. They look so happy and proud of themselves. I looked at the pictures and realized that I will never have that. Boys like dad are rare. Nowadays, most of them are jerks. They don't know how to love you properly. I don't say that I want to find a boyfriend the next day, but seeing my parents so happy hurts me in a way that I can't explain. They haven't done anything to me, but I want to feel their happiness. 

The rest of the day, I spent at home with my parents. I helped them a bit with their work. Writing is not bad, but I don't see it as my career. It's not like I know what I want to study. I mean, I am only sixteen. There is a lot of time for that. Now, all I want is to get my life in the right way. I know that it won't be easy, but I have to do it. The other thing that I want to do is to help Blake. This will be harder, but I won't give up. For some reason, I care about him and I want him to be happy. Every person deserves this.