Following my parents' steps(SQ:The good girl is changing me)

Chapter nineteen - Time for the truth

Skyler's POV:

I know that Blake is mad at me, but I can't tell him anything. I don't know has he talked with Missy, but he better not. She is crazy enough to do something and I don't want him to get hurt. This is something that I have to stop. I can't continue like that. Everyone is asking what is going on with me, but I can't tell anyone. My parents will help me for sure, but how I can be sure that she won't do something to them. Maybe she won't hurt them, but what if she made them lose their job. I need to stop her. I don't know how, but Missy won't continue doing this. I can't understand why she is going after all the people that care about me. They haven't done anything to her. My parents don't even know who is she. Anyways, I will think about her later. Well, thanks to her, one of my hands is full of lines. Luckily, my parents didn't understand about this. Otherwise, I was going to break my mom and I don't want this to happen. She still gets upset even with the smallest things that happen to my brother and me. I know that she cares for us, but we are old enough to take care of ourselves. I feel like soon all the cards will fall. Blake is suspecting that Missy is involved and I don't know what to do. I tried to lie to him, but he didn't look like he believed me. The last line, which I made, was for him. I lied and pushed away my best friend when I promised that I wouldn’t let him go. I am a terrible person. 

I woke up in the morning in my usual mood. Lately, I don't even want to get out of bed, but I have to do it. I checked my phone, but there were no new messages. I guess that Blake still doesn't want to talk with me. Yes, he apologized for leaving me, but I think that he won't come until I don't tell him everything. He doesn't know how much I want to do it, but I don't trust Missy. What has happened with mom and dad shouldn't happen with us. I don't want my best friend to fight for his life just because I didn't do something right. 

I got up and went to the bathroom. Later, I got changed. Now, I can't wear t-shirts or whatever it is for a top that reveals my arms. Hiding is not the solution, but I can't do anything else. Up to now, this is working. Outside is not that hot so I can wear a hoodie without being asked questions. I walked downstairs for breakfast. My parents and Mike were at the table. My brother still doesn't want to talk with me. I think that mom and dad have noticed this, but they never said anything. To be honest, like that is better. 

- Skyler, how are you today? - dad asked

- I'm fine, thanks. 

Here we go. I started lying from the morning. When I can stop doing this? It's hurting me. I have never lied to anyone and now I do this every single day just to avoid questions. 

- That's good. I guess that school is going great. 

- Yes, we have work, but up to now, I don't have problems with it. 

- That's what I want to hear. Don't be a bad student like me. 

- I won't, don't worry. 

After breakfast, I walked to school. Blake was in front of my locker. I thought that he doesn't want to talk with me. I smiled at him, but he didn't return it. Maybe he is still mad. 

- Blake, are you ok?

- No. I have to talk with you, but this time you will tell me everything. I am tired of sitting and doing nothing. 

- Don't start with this again. 

- I will start with it. Skyler, what is going on with you? You got skinnier, stopped talking, and started pushing everyone away. I thought that we share everything. Remember when you said that you won't go away. Was this a lie?

- What? Of course not. 

- Then why are you doing it. 

- Because...

I didn't finish and looked up to see Missy. Blake looked in the same direction and understood. I want to tell him everything and would have done it up to now if I wasn't scared of her. Yes, I am scared. For my best friend's life. She walked by me and gave me a smirk. I took my things and ran away to class. Blake followed me and sat next to me. 

- What she has done to you?

- Nothing. 

- That's not true. I saw the way she looked at you. 

- I can't talk about this. 

- Why? With what she is holding you?

- Nothing.

- That's not true. Just tell me. 

- I CAN'T. - I said and started crying

Blake pulled me for a hug coming with a kiss on the top of my head. I feel like a crybaby, but I can't do this anymore. This girl is killing me. If I continue like that soon I will be alone. No one will trust me. Even my parents. I hate her so much, but I can't do anything. She is controlling me. 

On the lunch break, I told Blake to go and take a table. I will go to the bathroom and will come later. When I was done, I walked out. I was about to go for lunch when Missy appeared. What does she want from me this time? Like what she did is not enough. 

- Missy, I want to go eat. 

- I thought that we had a deal. 

- I don't understand.

- Your friend is suspicious and I think that he knows everything. I guess that I wasn't that clear. I'm sorry, but I have to punish you for that. 

- No, please don't do anything. He doesn't deserve it. Please. 

- I'm sorry, but you were a bad girl. Now you have to take the consequences of your actions. 

- No! You can't do this. He is innocent. 

- But not you. I told you that if you tell someone, I have to do something to this person. 

- Please, don't do it. I'm begging you. - I said with tears in my eyes

How she can be so cruel? Blake didn't do anything to her. She is a monster. I hate her. Because of her, I lost everything. My best friend doesn't trust me, I have to lie to my parents and my brother is mad at me. 

- I don't care. This is what you get.

- Nooooo!

- If you do something to me, I will kill you. 

Both with Missy looked up and saw Blake. What is he doing here? Now I will have bigger problems. At least I don't have to hide anything from him anymore. This is bad. Now she might hurt him, but it wasn't me who told him. He understood it by himself. 

- If you don't leave Skyler alone, you have to deal with me. 

- I suggest you stay away. Otherwise, you will have to pay with your life. - she said and walked away

- Hey, are you ok?

- Yes, thank you. - I said and gave him a tight hug

- You need to explain to me many things. 

- I know, but can it be when we go home? I don't want to talk here.

- No problem. 

Nothing else was said. Both of us walked for our next class. Now, I have to tell him everything. It's not like he didn't understand it by himself. I don't know how he suspected something, but I am glad that he was there. Otherwise, I had to keep lying to him and I don't want that. 

After school, we walked home. I know that my parents are working so they won't bother us. They only came to greet us and made themselves coffee. Sometimes, I think that they work a lot, but it's not of my business to tell them that. They know it perfectly. Blake and I walked into my room and I sat on the bed. He sat in front of me and made me look at him. It won't be easy, but I can't hide anymore. 

- Did Missy tell you to don't tell me anything, because she is going to hurt me?

- Yes and this is not only for you. She knows that Mike is suspecting something and said that it will be bad if he loses his friends because of his sister. I don't know what she will do with my parents, but I couldn't risk it. I'm sorry. I didn't want to hide anything from you or lie, but I had no choice. I couldn't let her do something to you. Will you forgive me?

- I will, but only because I know what type of person this girl is. 

He pulled me for a hug and I broke down in his arms. I don't lie to cry in front of him, but I can't hold my tears anymore. I hurt him and I don't deserve him to forgive me. Soon we pulled apart and he looked at me. I noticed how he looked in my arms. Don't tell me that he saw it. I didn't say anything and pulled my sleeves. I guess that he understood that I am hiding something. 

- Skyler, do you need to tell me something?

- No, I don't. 

- Then why are you hiding your arms?

- I'm not. 

- Then show me your arms. 

- I can't.

- Why?

- Because you will be mad at me when you see what I have done. 

- Skyler, will you show me your arms?

I didn't say anything and put my arms on my knees. He carefully pulled up the sleeves and looked at them. Then he gave me a look and I saw tears in his eyes. I nodded my head and he pulled me for a tight hug. I feel sorry for what I did, but I couldn't help myself. I did so many bad things that I needed to punish myself. 

- Why did you do that? 

- Because since no one punished me, I had to do it myself. 

- But why? You didn't do anything wrong. 

- No, I did. I disappointed many people and started lying. 

- This one looks new. - he said and touched my last line 

- It's for you. I hid the truth and lied to you. I pushed you away when I said that I won't leave. I'm sorry. 

- But you had a reason. You shouldn't hurt yourself. 

- That's what I deserve. 

- No, you don't deserve anything bad. 

He is not right. I deserve it all. Blake lifted my head and carefully wiped my tears. He kept his hands on my cheeks and looked at me. Both of us were staring at each other without talking. He gave me a small smile and I returned it. I closed my eyes just to enjoy his touch. Soon I felt something warm on my lips, which made me smile. Maybe I found what I have been searching for. After all, I might have a relationship like my parents. When we pulled apart, I looked at him and saw that he was still upset. 

- Hey, you don't have to worry about me. I will be fine. 

- Will you stop doing this?

- I don't know. Since people still hate me that means that I have to change some things in myself. 

- No, you don't. You are perfect just the way you are. I don't want you to continue hurting yourself. Promise me that you won't do this anymore. 

- Look, I...

- Skyler!

- Ok. I promise to not hurt myself anymore. 

- Thank you. 

- Can you make me a favor?

- What is it?

- Don't tell my parents about this? Otherwise, I will break my mom. 

- Why?

- I have told you that she is sensitive. 

- Yes, I know that. 

- If she sees this, she will never talk with me and start doubting herself. Please, don't tell them. 

- Ok, I won't tell anyone. This will be our secret. 

-Thank you. I had huge luck with a friend like you. 

- You mean with a best friend like me. 

- A best friend with benefits. - I said and he laughed

- We can upgrade if you want. 

- I won't deny it. - I chuckled

- I want you to tell me everything. No more hiding and lies. Understood?

- Understood. Can I have a hug?

- Even two. 

Until the end of the day, I was with my best friend. To be honest, I don't know what exactly we are after this kiss, but I am happy that he is with me. Blake is the only person that understands me and with who I feel comfortable sharing everything. Well, except my parents. I hope that my lines will be gone before they understand. I don't want to upset my mom. She is very sensitive and I don't want to ruin my relations with her. She doesn't deserve it, either my dad. I love them so much and I will make sure that I won't disappoint them.