The Cost of Blind Love.
SERAPHINA’S POV
'I had always been good at loving people and thought if.... just if I loved them enough they would return the love to me even if it's not true maybe out of guilt they would. Then I realised not everyone is as stupid as I am.’
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"She's cold in bed, stiff. Lies there like a log of wood, counting ceiling tiles."
"...But you.... You are way better than your sister. Your moans, your body shape… I could die a million times just lying on you. You have angles."
Listening to my chosen mate Alpha Caden, complimenting my younger sister, choosing her over me, and the worst part was I could hear her giggling…..
Or maybe not …definitely not my sister.
I told myself I was imagining it.
I was good at that too.
My hand was already on the door before my mind caught up, pushing it open slowly, quietly, like some part of me already knew and wanted one final second of not knowing.
I wish I had stayed outside.
Elowen sat on Caden's thigh. His hand cupped her hip, fingers tracing patterns I recognised. He had traced them on me too, just me, once, before.
Elowen's dress was undone at the back, her mouth swollen, her eyes bright with triumph as they found mine.
My heart made a harsh, desperate sound against my ribs, trying hard to convince itself this wasn't real.
I was dreaming. Wasn't I?
Someone, wake me up from this goddamn dream.
"Ca...den." My voice came out smaller than I intended. "You chose me, remember? This wasn't the future we planned together under the full moon. I love you. I mean... You love me too, don't you?"
Warm tears rolled down my cheeks before I could stop them.
"You never could compete." My sister tilted her head, and I watched her lips curve into something I had never seen on her face before. Something satisfying. "Not with me."
My sister. My blood. The girl I had held through every nightmare after our parents died, whose hunger I had gone without eating to fix, whose tears I had caught before they could even finish falling.
She was saying this to my damn face.
I had felt grief so heavy it made breathing feel like work.
I had felt hunger and exhaustion and the particular loneliness of raising someone else while falling apart yourself. I had felt love, stupid, blind, faithful love, for a man who was apparently discussing my body with my sister like I was a disappointing piece of furniture he was considering replacing.
But I had never felt the floor move beneath me until this moment.
"How long? How long have you been doing this, Elowen?"
"Sister…"
"Call me that one more time and I swear I will slit your throat right at this moment." I had never said that to her in my life but my chest burned as warm tears streaked down my face.
I was ashamed to even look at her. This was my younger sister.
"I love him. I didn't plan it, Sera. These things happen."
These things happen.
"I raised you. I sacrificed for you. I loved you before I ever thought to love myself. And here you are f*****g my chosen mate and you tell me these things happen, Elowen. You dare to say it with the same face you used to cry into my shoulder ...."
Slap!!
Before I could complete my words her hand collided with my cheek.
Caden's expression didn't shift into guilt. Didn't shift into shock. He looked at me the way you look at something mildly inconvenient and sighed.
"You're embarrassing yourself." Caden's voice was flat. "This is why, honestly. This right here. Too much…..trust me I'm done with you Sera…. I had never loved you obsessed peacock.
I opened my mouth to say something….but my eyes had lots more to tear up than my lips.
“Ca…den…”
I had planned a future in this pack. A home. A mate who chose me back with the same energy I poured into choosing him.
I had planned to stop surviving and start living. I had planned to finally be enough for someone.
I was so stupid.
Caden walked up to me in slow steps just for me to feel the unexpected….
His foot kicked against my stomach, his elbow hit my back and I was forced to bow in front of him.
“Guards!!” He yells, as the resounding footsteps of the guards become louder.
“Open the gate for the prompt announcement.”
I wanted to believe it, not what I was thinking, I gripped the hem of his royal coat.
“Ca…deb ... .ca..den what's happeni….”
Before I could finish my words I felt him pull my hair to the back as Caden, the one I had fallen in love with, pulled my hair and dragged me to the announcement Chamber.
I ignored everything else and began to struggle for my own life
"Seraphina Riven is no longer Luna of Ironmoor. She is no longer welcome within these walls.”
I heard him announce as he ordered the gate to be opened.
You can't do this to me Caden ... .where do you want me to go?
The woods of course since you always had something to say, Elowen spat, as she ripped my dresses in half
"Get out.
My body hit the ground hard the moment I was pushed out of my throat guards.
My palms flat against the dirt, the worst rain begins to pour.
Perfect timing of total humiliation.
I banged the gate once with my fist hard, screamed on top of my lungs as my wet hair stuck to my face mixed with tears.
I wrapped what was left of my dress around myself and started walking.
I wasn't sure where I was going but followed wherever my legs took me.
Just a knock into a dashing stone and fall flat on my face.
The pain that tore through my leg was the last thing I felt before everything went black.
