The Silver Creek Wolves: The Gamma's Heartache

6. Mandy

That was amazing. It went way further than I expected it to. I did date in high school, but never went all the way, hoping to save myself for my mate. Being in that position makes you get creative in other ways.

Blake was amazing. I don't know if it is the mate bond or if he is just that good, but I am just happy that I know he is all mine for the rest of our lives.

Once he was done cleaning us up, he held me in his arms and drifted off to sleep. While I was exhausted, I couldn't sleep. I had too many thoughts running through my mind. So I flipped over so I was the little spoon to his big spoon and Blake cupped my breast like it was his security blanket.

I really could feel the love Blake had for me through our bond, which is unusual this early in meeting one's mate. However, I felt a pull to live to my fullest potential as a warrior and I didn't know if I could do both. Blake is right, he can't leave his post here to come with me so I can follow my dreams. But is it fair for me to sacrifice mine?

I would love to let Opal out to run and let me think right now, but Blake won't budge and I don't know my way around well enough. I will see if Jackie will show me around more tomorrow so I know where I can and cannot go.

I also miss my family. This is something that I would talk to Jamie about. He and I are the closest of my siblings. I hope he can make it with my parents on Saturday. He always gives me the best advice, even if I don't want to hear it.

Goddess, Blake's body temperature is going to suffocate me. I need to find a way out of his arms for a minute. Plus, I really need to use the bathroom.

I roll over and pepper light kisses on his face. "Blake, I need to get up." I whisper. When that doesn't work, I make my way to his ear. "Blake, babe, I need to get up." He wraps his arms around me tighter. At this point if I don't get up I am going to pee on him, so I reach for his waist and start tickling him as I blow raspberries on his neck.

"Holy f**k Mandy!" He shoots up like a rocket. "What is wrong with you?"

At this point I am already running to the bathroom. He is trying to follow me thinking I am playing a game. I am fast though and make it just in time to lock the door before he can push in. "I had to pee and you wouldn't let go!" I yell through the door. "I tried to wake you up nicely. Next time I will just pee on you."

I hear some grumbles and then his footsteps pad back toward the bed. I finish my business, wash my hands, run some cold water over my face and neck, and then head back to bed.

As I crawl back into bed, Blake leans over and whispers in my ear, "Payback is a b***h, love. I don't like to be startled awake. Just for that, you get extra work tomorrow."

"It is not my fault you are such a heavy sleeper. What kind of Gamma sleeps so soundly? And I REALLY had to pee. Plus, it is not fair that I get punished in public for something in our private lives."

"I have never slept so soundly in my life. That is why you scared the s**t out of me. Must be you. Having you in my arms and your bare breast in my hand must have made me feel extra secure."

I looked at my phone to see the time and realized it was only 2 in the morning. We had another three hours before we had to be up for morning training. However, now I was wide awake. So, I crawled next to Blake and snuggled into his arms. "Tell me what your favorite color is?"

"Blue. Yours?"

"Yellow."

"Favorite flower?"

"Daisy. Favorite food?"

"Meatloaf. How about we try to get some more sleep?"

"Mine too! One last question. Do you mind if I ask Luna Jackie to show me around a bit tomorrow? I need to let Opal out for a bit to stretch her legs and I want to know where to go and stay out of trouble."

"Why don't you let Thor and I show you? He has been dying to meet Opal."

"I don't want to hurt you or Thor, but I don't know if I am ready for that yet. I need to let Opal out so I can think. I do my best thinking while Opal runs. If Thor is there, I can't trust her to behave herself."

'I heard that.'

'I know you did and you can just calm down' I tell Opal as she gets an attitude with me.

Blake thought for a minute. "I understand. Just know we are ready when you are" As he said that I saw his eyes swirl to a golden color and guessed that Thor was letting me know he was in agreement with Blake.

As werewolves, we are one with our wolves in that we occupy the same space, but we have our own thoughts and feelings. It is not uncommon for them to fall in line with each other, but there are times we disagree. Many times our wolves will express their feelings through our eyes when we are in human form. And I could tell in this case that Thor was ready to meet me...and Opal.

The next day went quickly. Once we were done with training, I took a quick shower and met Blake, Alpha Kevin, and Luna Jackie for lunch. After Lunch the Luna and I had plans for her to show me around and then run in our wolf forms.

"Thank you Luna Jackie for doing this for me. I need to stretch Opal's legs and clear my head a bit."

"Please just call me Jackie. You will be an Elite female, so title's will only be required in formal settings. I am happy to show you around. Those boys can be intense sometimes."

"I am just so lost right now. When you grow up believing and dreaming of one thing, only to find out that the moon goddess has other plans. And while I have always wanted a mate and Blake is amazing, I never wanted to give up all my dreams for my mate."

"Didn't you think it would ever be a possibility?"

"No, I never dreamed I would be mated to an Elite ranked wolf. I never thought I would be mated to a rank above warrior. I was genuinely surprised when I found out who Blake was."

"Well, far be it for me to give you advice on what to do since I am just getting to know you. However, you have to do what is right for you. Blake is your mate and if he loves you, he will give you space to figure it out. But you have to talk to him about it. He won't understand if you don't tell him how you feel and what you are thinking."

"Thank you Jackie. I appreciate your advice. I know we were supposed to run together, but do you mind if I take a raincheck and go by myself this time? I need to let Opal stretch her legs while I think and then I am going to find Blake to have a talk."

"Not at all. I totally understand. Enjoy your run and let me know how the talk goes. We'll meet up tomorrow to discuss the dinner for your family on Saturday when they come to visit."

With that I find a spot in the woods and remove my clothes, leaving them in a neat pile. I shift into Opal. Once shifted, Opal shakes her beautiful white fur. She has icy blue eyes. Her ears perk up and listen for what is around on alert to her new surroundings. I retreat and give Opal the reins so I can just think about what to do.

A couple hours later, Opal lets me know she is tired and ready to give control back to me. I will have to pay more attention to the packlands next time I go out. I just had too much on my mind this run. I am ready to go talk to Blake. I don't know how he is going to handle my decision, but if he loves me and wants me as his mate, he will hear me out and we will work out the details together.