Crossing the bounded waves

#3 Satisfied

(Why do feel like this? Why the f**k do I feel satisfaction all throughout my body?")

Today is the first day of college, I have already talked to Guiden about changing my working shift, following my class schedules.

I don't know what's with today but I feel weird, I don't want to go out of my room, I don't feel excited. It's odd.

Anyways, it's the first day of college and although I don't want to go today, I need to. I quickly ate my breakfast and headed out of my room.

When I arrived at my first subject, I hurriedly sat on the farthest seat on the back from the right side of the classroom. Thank goodness I got this seat, I'm not really used to sitting on the front, the back seat is the seat I feel most comforted in.

I looked at my left and saw a man looking at me, I smiled at him and he smiled back, we talked for a while, he's a really cool guy, so far, I knew these things about him; his name is Hans, he's got 3 siblings and that he's quite confused (Although I don't really understood what he meant by being confused). I'm quite happy I made a friend on my first day, not bad.

"The professor's coming" a student in my class yelled. I straightened my back and sat comfortably on my chair.

The students were all rushing to get in their chairs while the professor get's in the room. I was about to see the professor's face when I felt my phone vibrate on my pocket. I took my phone off my pocket and read the message, "Shan, I'm at your uni, I need to talk to you" it read, why would sister Anise need me outside?

"Good morning class, my name is Guiden and I am your English teacher" our professor spoke, I looked up and was shocked to see Guiden, yes, Guiden. He's what? Our teacher?

I stared at him slack jawed, I was staring for about a minute until he finally locked eyes with me, his eyes widened for a moment but he quickly regained his composure and continued his introduction. I wasn't able to regain my composure as fast as he did tho, so I stayed there looking at him while my phone vibrates over and over again.

Fortunately, Hans noticed my bewilderment and snapped his finger Infront of my face, I was pulled from my reverie and then I looked at Hans who was eyeing me weirdly, I was about to speak to him until I noticed my phone that kept on vibrating. Oh no! Sister Anise, she must be really mad right now.

I stood from my chair and headed to the door but before I could go out I was stopped by our professor's call; "Student, where are you going" Guiden asked. I looked at him and truthfully told him the reason, thankfully, our professor is fine with it and he let me leave.

I walked for about 4 minutes until I arrived to our university gate, as expected, Sister Anise is in there and as expected again, she's fuming mad.

"Sister Anise!" I called her, she looked at me for awhile and then pulled me on an alley near our university.

"What's the matte-" I asked but was stopped by a sudden slap across my face, Sister Anise slapped me. It's no surprise at all, she used to do more when I was on the orphanage, whenever I get close to a male, she gets angry and beats me up.

"You! You disrespectful girl, how dare you meet up with a guy just a day after you went out of the orphanage?!" She yelled while her fingers points at me, she wants to do more than slap me, I know, but she's holding back because we're at public.

"He's my boss." I said calmly while I softly touch my cheeks, damn it hurts.

"And why is your boss taking you home?!" She asked.

"I want to save money and accepting his offer doesn't take any money out of my pocket" I answered .

"Use your own money, you.. you .. you... Slut"

I'm glad she finally started using curse words. Congratulations to her.

"I won't ride with my boss next time, I promise." I said trying to reassure her, I don't want to yell at sister Anise, she's still a second mother to me so for as long as I could I'll hold my emotions back in. My adoptive mother told me about my birth mother and father, I don't remember them, the only thing I knew about them are these characteristics, I'm a mix of my mother and father, I have the patience of my mom and the violent tendencies of my father. My adoptive mother always told me to keep my emotions inside me and that I shouldn't hurt anyone just like how my father hurt my mother

I don't want to be like my dad.

I hugged sister Anise gently and told her I won't do it again. I bid her goodbye and walked to my classroom, nothing is on my mind while walking on my classroom and for some reason I didn't notice both my hands clenched in a fist.

I really don't want to hurt anyone but I don't know how long I will last holding my emotions back inside me.

After I arrived at my room, I quickly sat on my chair and looked at the front of the room, I'm trying really hard on containing my emotions, it's only now that I noticed my hands balled into a fist, I'm really angry, aren't I?

"Girl, your phone needs to get fixed, it's lagging too much." The girl Infront of me told her seatmate.

"Yeah, I know right, I really need to get it fixed"

They talked some more and kept on laughing while making jokes about their phones. Guiden, our professor noticed them and told them to keep quite but soon laughed along with them, I hated their giggles, I want them to stay quite, I badly need them to shut up, but they didn't.

Before I could stop myself, I went Infront of them, took one of their phone, and sent it flying across the room, half of the class shrieked because of what I did and the girl (who is the owner of the phone) stared at me, with a frightened expression.

Have I been keeping my emotions inside me too much?

"It needs to be fixed anyways, just buy a new one, I'll pay for it" I said, feeling as if half of the burden I've been carrying is gone. I sat back at my seat and looked upfront, I locked eyes with our professor and as expected, he looked shocked and confused as to why I did it.

I'm confused too, what the f**k did I just do, and for some odd reason, why the hell do I feel satisfied?!

+End of #3+