The Captain

You Confuse Me

When you nod your head yes,

But you always say no,

What do you mean?

Justin Bieber- What do you mean

____________________________________

Harris couldn't concentrate.

On anything.

Throughout the weekend he hadn't been able to concentrate on anything. Not a single thing. He was the most distracted he had ever been. He would sit in front of his dinner staring absent mindedly on the plate. He would stare till regi reminded him he had to eat before he drifts back into consciousness only to realize he had lost his appetite. Fiona noticed his distractions but didn't ask him on anything. She knew enough, after all it was her setup. She would just smile mischievously and wiggle her eyebrows at him when the boy was too distracted to notice. She hadn't bothered to ask Harris what went down when she had stubbornly locked them up. Harris' incessant zone outs were enough to give her a hint for insinuations and wild fantasies.

When the weekdays came Harris wasn't exactly dreading to go to school. He was dreading to see Lesley.

Mornings were the worst. Inevitably, both boys would have to see each other when walking through the hallways to their lockers. Harris would turn into an emotional wreck anytime his eyes fell on Lesley. He didn't know how to act around him now. They weren't exactly avoiding each other but neither were they confronting the other. Lesley only made it more difficult. He never said a word to Harris. Anytime he sees the dirty blonde approaching he would quickly throw his gaze to the ground and avoid eye contact. Not like Harris would even be looking. The boy would be desperately finding something to engage in to unacknowledge Lesley's presence.

Lunch time wasn't any different. Lesley who usually sat alone would now have to distract himself with his phone or read a book (yes he reads books at the cafeteria) so that his eyes wouldn't unconsciously have to drift to where Harris was sitting. Which had only proved to be impossible.

Harris on the other hand unpurposefully zones out all what his friends were saying and just stared at his plate over thinking a million thoughts a minute or having to pinch himself to look away when he realized he was shamelessly staring at Lesley.

Both boys were aware of the fact that they had almost kissed, they knew they had almost kissed. That was what made them so confused about everything. Harris could swear his lips had brushed Lesley's. In fact every time he recounted the night he felt a wave of tingles on his lips. And then he would end up thinking about things he wasn't supposed to think of. Wild thoughts.

Okay this is what went down.......

After some random boy who happened to attend diamond hills had screeched into the hallway the most dreaded phrase during a heavily drug and alcohol induced party session, Harris quickly shot up and began banging the door frantically for any passer by to release them. Fiona appeared with Paul in no time and quickly unlocked them with all four teenagers running down the stairs and escaping through the kitchen window. The had all run in different directions with Fiona and Harris running into the nearest eatery they could find. They slumped into a booth to catch their breath only to end up laughing at their dilemma. They stayed for some minutes till they heard no more sirens then retreated back to Paul's house. The house had become silent and trashy with some passed out teenagers lying down in uncomfortable positions. Paul arrived not shortly after that so they helped him clean up before making their way back home.

Harris never saw Lesley again.

He still couldn't get over the fact that he and Lesley had almost kissed. Which meant there had been a possibility of it actually happening. And Lesley hadn't made any gesture or action to pull away when their faces were getting closer, he hadn't pushed Harris off, he didn't say anything to interrupt the moment. Did that mean he wanted it to happen too?

Yes.......too.

Harris wished it had happened. He was dying for it to have happened. So badly. He would keep turning in bed thinking what if it had happened? His insides would turn into goo and he would end up smiling till his cheeks hurt and turned a deep shade of red. He would then quickly cover his face embarrassingly but that didn't hide the fact that he was still smiling giddily underneath his palms. What if it had actually happened?

What would he had done? What would have unfolded from there?

Just an 'almost kiss' and it was driving him bananas how much more an actual kiss?

Lesley hadn't approached or in fact made any attempt to confront Harris on the issue which made Harris disturbed, confused and quite unsure whether or not he should take the step to talk. Harris wanted to know what Lesley was thinking now so badly. He would steal glances at him in class to see if he would find any expression what so ever but no, nothing. Either the dark haired boy had his nose stuck in a book or had his keen eyes fixated on the teacher before them.

How is he able to do that? Harris thought.

Just be completely unbothered and act like it never happened? Not when Harris was going crazy and ended up spending 1hour under the shower.

But then this was Lesley we are talking about. The boy could make anything possible.

"Yes Harris?"

Harris quickly glanced up from his stupor. Mr child's stood before the class looking down at him with narrowed eyes.

"The project you were supposed to present today Harris?....."

Oh. Harris thought. The biology project. He totally forgot. They were supposed to present it today?

He quickly glanced in Lesley's direction. Lesley sat in his chair with his arms folded and his nose buried in a textbook. He had on his straight face like nothing was happening around him.

Wait..... this is where he takes Harris by surprise and bursts out to laugh and say he actually did the work right?

"Mr Cooper we dont have all day..." Mr child's said adjusting his glasses.

Harris glanced at Lesley again but the boy was making no actions of being about to present a work or pull a handout out of his bag.

"Uhh...... I don't have it?" Harris said with an unsure expression hoping he won't get into trouble. This was Mr Childs, of course he would.

"What do you mean you don't have my work?" Mr Childs demanded getting worked up with his tone achieving a higher pitch. His forehead was developing a crease with his squinted eyes on the poor boy who was beginning to wish he had skipped school. Harris shuddered lightly in his seat.

"I mean I dont have it...." Harris trailed of with his voice barely above a whisper. Mr childs was the one teacher no one messes with. He had this aura around him that would make you worship his request. How come he forgot? And why was childs not questioning Lesley? He was on the project with him too wasn't he?

"Mr Cooper so you're telling me you dont have my work?" Child's folded his arms unbelievably with his unwavering gaze not leaving Harris. He released a deep breath gazing at Harris with stern eyes through his thick pair of glasses which only made it more frightening.

Harris shrugged at his question and mason snorted beside him mockingly. Harris turned and gave him a dirty look before turning his attention back to the teacher who was gradually losing all patience he had stored over the weekend.

"Who has it then? Huh?" Child's inquired by unfolding his arms and placing them on his hip. He raised his brows expectantly at Harris.

Harris caved into his seat. He didn't know why Lesley was being silent about the whole scene. Maybe he had done the work and will surprise them at the end of the conversation. Yes, he would do that. He was Lesley, Lesley wouldn't not do his assignment.

Unsurely but having no really right answer to Child's question, Harris slowly gestured his head towards Lesley's direction and nodded so Mr child's would get the hint. Mr child's took a glance at Lesley and raised his brows in question as if to ask Harris if he was being right and Harris quickly nodded. After all he was on the project with Harris. He had to have something on him.

"Lesley do you have it?" Child's inquired sighing.

Lesley for the first time looked up from his book and glanced towards Mr child's direction.

"Have what?" He asked confused.

Harris' eyes swelled into plates as he began to insinuate the what was about to happen.

"My biology project Lesley. Are you having it?" Mr child's massaged the bridge of his nose getting frustrated. His patience for the day was running out.

Lesley's lips formed into an 'O' as he glanced apologetically at the annoyed teacher before him.

"I forgot to do that."

Harris' jaw slacked unto his lap.

"You what?......" Child's fumed shifting his weight to his left foot and throwing him an unbelievable look.

Lesley shrugged. "I'm sorry I forgot."

Harris deadpanned and caved into his seat. How come Lesley had forgot to do the work? That was so not him.

Child's slowly massaged his temples and took light breaths. After seconds of trying to find his sanity and Harris praying for the worst, he finally spoke up,

"Both of you to Wheeler's office. Now." He stated flatly.

Harris quickly spoke up to protest. Not Wheeler's office. He had been there more times this term than ever.

"But Mr childs we......."

"Dont push me Cooper." Child's retorted and pointed towards the door. "Both of you, out."

Harris threw his head back in agony groaning audibly enough to resonate through out the class. Rashford laughed behind him with mason snickering beside him.

Lesley didn't bother to beg the teacher for a reconsideration or anything of that sort. He simply packed his books and started taking his leave. Since Harris didn't have any other choice, he gathered his stuff too and followed Lesley out of the door.

Lesley didn't say anything as he walked before Harris. He sauntered his way before him not even throwing a glance back.

Lesley wasn't refusing to acknowledge Harris on purpose... The hard truth was that he was feeling shy. Very.

He had almost giving in into his inner yearnings and kissed Harris. What he had so hard avoided to do all week anytime his eyes fell on Harris. He had been so drawn into Harris that night that he couldn't control his inner impulses anymore. And Harris had only made it more difficult with his beautiful self.

Lesley was afraid Harris would find out he had feelings for him. He didn't want Harris to find out about what was killing him and gotten him so distracted that he forgot to do the biology assignment. The same thing that distracted him and zones him out anytime he tried to even read a book.

So he tried his best possible to appear unfazed about Friday nights incident. He wanted Harris to think he was unbothered so Harris wouldn't know what was really going down in his heart.

Lesley knocked lightly on Wheelers door and the man instructed them to enter. On seeing the two in his office, Principal Wheeler dropped his pen and relaxed into his chair with a knowing look.

"Well, well, well... At least you dont have bruises this time. That's an improvement." The man smiled.

Harris sighed and took a seat next to where Lesley had sat.

"So tell me, what did you too do this time?" Wheeler asked sliding his office chair forward a bit and resting his elbows on the desk before him. He took of his glasses and darted his tired eyes between the two.

Harris waited on Lesley to speak first but unfortunately that didn't seem to be happening. So he sighed and went first.

"We couldn't turn in our biology project." Harris explained wrestling his thumbs unconsciously.

Wheeler raised his brows, "And why is that?"

Harris sighed again, "We didn't finish on time."

"And who is to blame for that?"

Harris shrugged. Wheeler turned to Lesley and asked him the same question.

"Lesley who is to blame for the delay?"

Lesley without wasting a second quickly pointed at Harris.

"Hey!!" Harris cried staring at him in bewilderment.

"What?" Lesley shrugged nonchalantly. "You didn't do your part of the project."

"Says the guy who didn't want me to work with him." Harris retorted not believing what he was hearing.

"Oh so I'm to blame now?"

"Oh god you didn't just say that...." Harris rolled his eyes.

"The last time I checked you were attending mad party raves knowing very well we had a project to present on Monday." Lesley snorted.

"You mean the same party you attended?" Harris scoffed.

Lesley rolled his eyes, "Maybe if I hadn't gotten tricked by someone's sister I would actually get the time to do the work." He narrowed his eyes at Harris.

"You're talking about time? So all those 48 hours you had over the weekend were you shooting a movie in Hollywood with Tom cruise?" Harris questioned cynically.

"No Harris, I was role playing Rihanna in the Valerian movie what the f**k?"

"Language!" Wheeler warned sternly drawing their attention back to the fact that they were actually at the principals office.

"If you two are going to sit there and bicker like an old married couple then I might as well give you your punishments so you go and continue that somewhere else."

Lesley's cheeks heated up on hearing he and Harris being referred to as an old married couple. Harris wasn't any different.

"Listen here, I know you both have soccer practices filling your schedules now so I'll be lenient with you. Either you finish this project by tonight and turn it in before 8 am tomorrow or I make sure you stay after lunch break to help the janitors clear up the tables for the rest of this month?" Wheeler inquired fiercely. "You hear me boys?"

Harris wasn't ready to clean tables. Lesley also couldn't stand the smell of the cafeteria for long so they both opted for the former.

"Good, now you can take your leave. Say hi to your father for me Harris will you?" Wheeler asked suddenly changing to a better mood. Harris nodded slowly wondering if it was a trap.

Lesley briskly made his way out of the door first with Harris following behind him.

"And why would you blame me for something we both were at fault at." Harris asked Lesley with a glare when they got to the hallways. He didn't get why Lesley was putting the blame on him.

"I'm not blaming you I'm just saying its your fault." Lesley replied turning around to face him.

"That doesn't even make any sense....." Harris scoffed.

"With a brain like yours I bet it wouldn't." Lesley smirked.

Harris rolled his eyes, "you jerk...." He hissed.

Lesley shrugged and sighed running his palm over his face.

"I started the work if that makes you feel any better...."

"Well why didn't you just complete it?" Harris replied.

"Because I kept getting distracted!"

"By what?"

"By some green eyed................ f**k!!!" Lesley groaned cussing at himself for almost spilling it.

"By what?...." Harris demanded again wondering what had been so distracting for Lesley to literally forget. He was beginning to think it had something to do with the death notes again. He was afraid Lesley had received another one which had been the cause of his distraction. He raised his brows expectantly waiting for an answer.

Lesley looked at the boy before him who was so eager for a reply. He was afraid to tell Harris the truth. He didn't want to lie either.

"Never mind." Lesley said turning around to leave.

"Hey wait!......" Harris grabbed Lesley's wrist unconsciously to stop him from leaving. This took Lesley by surprise as he glanced at Harris perplexed. He then looked at Harris' hold on him then looked back up at the boy again. Harris also stood there wild eyed surprised by his own actions too. He quickly dropped Lesley's hand fixating his gaze on the ground looking really flustered.

He swallowed hard as his heart beat quickened its pace.

"I... I want to know if its the...."

"HARRIS!!"

Both boys turned around to see an oval faced brunet skipping towards them. Harris recognized her from the masquerade ball, Darcy it was right?

"Hey! I've been screaming your name for over a minute but you didn't seem to be hearing it." Darcy ranted almost out of breath from the running.

She smiled her million dollar pearly white teeth smile again while fanning herself.

"Hey Darcy, uhh.... I've been wondering where you've been." Harris lied forcing a smile which from the outside looked quite genuine.

"Awnn Harris, always such a darling......." She smiled brushing her hand on his arm affectionately.

Harris feeling uncomfortable quickly looked up to see Lesley looking at them both. His brown eyes held an emotion Harris couldn't put his finger to.

Lesley quickly swallowed the dryness in his throat and slowly took his leave. Harris watched him walking away but couldn't stop him. He didn't know what to say if he stopped him.

"You've been so scarce these days Harris." Darcy smiled up at him. "I was thinking maybe if you got a free time we could hang out?" She said.

Harris watched her not knowing how to reply to that. In as much as he had his little circle of friends he always hanged out with, he couldn't turn Darcy down. That would be rude. After all she's only trying to be nice.

"Yes sure." Harris replied hoping he wouldn't regret that later.

"Great!" She perked up. "Lemme take your number so I can call you." She pulled out her phone and pushed it into Harris' hands. "There."

Harris took the phone and quickly dialed his number and saved it.

"There.." He smiled handing the phone back to Darcy.

"So....see you around?" She pulled her lower lip between her teeth.

"Yeah sure." He smiled lightly.

"Bye then." Darcy waved and smiled once again before turning around and walking away.

Harris quickly shot up and run towards the direction Lesley had headed. They had to finish the project tonight and Harris didn't know how they were going to do that or even where. Most importantly he had to know what was bothering Lesley, Harris knew it wasn't the 'almost kiss' which was quiet hurtful which means Lesley could be receiving the death notes again. They were like friends now, and Harris had to look out for him.

"Lesley!"

The dark haired boy was just about to turn a corner when he heard his name by an all too familiar voice.

Harris jogged a little closer to where Lesley was... About 6 lockers apart.

"You heard wheeler. We are supposed to turn in the assignment by tomorrow.." Harris said.

"So you do it then...." Lesley shrugged.

Harris deadpanned licking his lips in frustration. "I'm not working my ass off to give you free credits Lesley."

"Then I'll do it then. Given I dont forget."

Harris threw his hands up in disbelief. "Its a project work."

"What are you saying Harris..?"

" I'm saying we do it together. To.ge.ther." Harris spelled out. "Its a group work not a single assignment." He pointed out.

Maybe Harris was persistent on them doing it together because it was a group project..... But deep inside he knew he was saying that so he could spend more time with Lesley. And he found that quiet saddening. But he didn't care, the heart wants what it wants.

"We can do it over at my place..." Harris suggested. He instantly regretted saying that. It meant he was indirectly inviting Lesley to his home. The boys cheeks began to heat up.

"I'm not comfortable in peoples homes." Lesley replied flatly.

Harris squinted his eyes finding that insulting. "What?....you are too rich for that?" He questioned.

Lesley's forehead creased at Harris' interpretation. "That's not even close to what I just said."

"Then what exactly did that mean.."

"Harris please don't......"

"What did you mean by that?"

"I'm sorry okay..?"

"No tell me!"

"Don't......"

"Just say it!"

"Harris!"

"Lesley!"

"Fine!! ......Jesus Christ!" Lesley groaned at Harris' persistency. "I have agoraphobia alright!!" Lesley screamed.

Harris creased his brows in confusion, "And what the f**k is that.."

Lesley sighed running his fingers through his hair. Harris was going to be the death of him.

"Its an anxiety disorder." Lesley sighed.

Harris blinked. "You have an anxiety disorder? Wait seriously?"

Lesley shrugged studying Harris carefully to know what he thought of it. Harris' view suddenly seemed so important to him.

"Wait you of all people? The guy who doesn't have any emotions what so ever?" Harris asked with an incredulous look still finding it hard to believe.

Lesley nodded taking a deep breath still not taking his eyes off lesley.

Harris' mouth shaped to form an 'O' not knowing what to say. Lesley had anxiety disorder? Seriously? He was the most collected and reserved person Harris had ever met.

"What is agaphobia?" Harris asked trying to fully understand Lesley's situation.

"Its agoraphobia you bimbo." Lesley slowly blinked at Harris dumpness.

"Yh whatever.." Harris muttered.

Lesley shrugged, "perceiving the environment unsafe and struggling to find an easy way out."

"And you've had that since when?" Harris inquired getting genuinely worried.

"Since the death notes." Lesley replied flatly casting his gaze downwards.

"Oh....." Harris trailed off.

Lesley saw the quick change in Harris expression into a sad and gloomy one so he quickly changed the subject.

"My place then?..."

Harris looked up to make sure if he had heard that right. "Really?" He asked.

"Yeah sure. Moreover my mom would be excited to have you over."

"Seriously....." Harris asked with his eyes opened wide in shock.

"I'm messing with you asshole." Lesley snickered, "Don't flatter yourself." He laughed mockingly.

Harris pulled his lips into a pout as he watched Lesley turn and walk away.

"Dipshit." Harris said smiling till his cheeks hurt.