Understanding Love

Chapter Two - Heidi

“Shut the f**k up, Heidi! I didn’t f**k around on you, but I should because you’re ugly as hell! You stupid b***h!”

These hateful, slurred, rotten words were spat forth by the boyfriend of Jeremy’s mother. Jeremy Gerlink had just turned 8 when Heidi Gerlink had started to see Patrick. Patrick worked at a local bar that his mother often visited after working a night at the Los Angeles strip club.

Patrick had wooed Heidi with sweet words and lavished compliments. Then after a few months of dating, he flipped the switch. He became verbally and physically abusive. Heidi clung to the relationship like a raft in the open tumultuous sea. She needed him because the thought of being alone caused her heart to race in fear.

Jeremy was also with her on that raft, and for two years, he clung for dear life, but he loved his mother. Heidi used to be a beautiful strawberry blonde, green-eyed, tall, and slender woman. Now at the age of 27, Heidi’s strawberry blonde hair has turned into a lifeless, dry mess. Her eyes were void of energy, brightness, and hope. Her frame was now rigid and frail from the drinking and starvation Heidi put it through.

On really hopeless days, Heidi would cuddle with Jeremy on their faded, ripped blue loveseat sofa, reminiscing about her past life. She’d sway her arms in the air and express her past life's intricacies with her hands. From these stories, Jeremy learned that when she lived in Blue Ridge, Georgia. His mother was beloved at her Fannin County Highschool. All the boys adore her because she was so beautiful. He’d heard of her beautiful family home with its seven-bed, four baths, and two garage structure. The home sat on 3 acres of land with a gliding river next to it. While his mother would tell the adventures she and her siblings would take in that forest home, her eyes would be bright and full of love.

However, her eyes would glaze over with tears when the stories would get dark. She would tell Jeremy that she came from a conservative Christian family. Her father’s name was Paul Gerlink, “He comes from good Christian stock,” his mother would say with a hint of mockery yet fearful respect in her voice.

Paul was a stocky man with blonde hair and crisp blue eyes. He owned a local construction company and a small restaurant that boasted that it served the best southern-cooked meals in the area.

Cassandra Gerlink was the wife, mother, homemaker, and cook. Cassandra was a petite woman with blue-green eyes and straight thin golden blonde hair. She was a pious woman many revered because she seemed the perfect Christian. She stood behind everything Paul endorsed and humbly helped run the business, never demanding she be recognized. Both parents were self-righteous and shrewd in Heidi’s eyes, but Cassandra was the most approachable of the two.

Heidi had two older brothers and one younger sister. Joshua was the eldest, with thick blonde hair, deep sea green eyes, and a stocky, muscular build. David was the second child with sandy blonde hair, a slender but muscular body, with sky blue eyes. Heidi was positioned between the boys and the youngest sister Mary. Mary was the picture-perfect parallel of their mother.

Paul felt that his family was and had to retain an image of perfection. Their reputation must remain imputably perfect. However, behind the facade, the family had many grotesque flaws. Paul would severely beat the children if their grades slipped, if they screwed up in a game, or embarrassed him in the slightest way.

Cassandra would ignore the abuse and cling to Paul as if his word was law. This wasn’t to say that she fully endorsed the abuse. She would wince for her beautiful children when she heard the smack followed by the mournful wailing. She believed the wife must support the husband at all costs because he was the head of the home. Therefore, she remained silent.

She remained silent when Paul found out that Heidi was being promiscuous with a senior boy who was a nonbeliever. Silence screamed when Paul beat Heidi with the belt until she bled because she allowed herself to be defiled. Silence spewed forth when Paul told her sons to find the boy and to “do what it takes” to the boy who defiled their sister. Silence haunted her when she found out her beautiful child ran away with the newborn son after giving birth.