In love with a bad neighbor

Chapter nineteen - Truth and realization

Emma's POV:

I keep acting the same way and I don't know why. I know that Vince and I are not dating, but it still hurts me when I see him with another girl. He has done this only twice, but it's enough. Well, I can't make him stay only with me. I don't know why I feel this way. To be honest, I don't even have the right. He is not my boyfriend. I won't lie that I would love it if this happened. I mean that Vince is better than Ricky. I know that I always compare them, but this is what I have to deal with. My mom's or my heart's choice. It looks easy, but it's not. I don't like arguing with my parents, but lately, I do that a lot. Well, mostly with my mom. Dad has nothing to do with that. He doesn't make me do things that I don't want to. About Vince. He is different. My neighbor might claim himself as a bad boy, but he is not. Maybe he was in his hometown, but here he is a good boy. I mean that it's not every day that a bad boy will save you and will stick only to one girl. To be honest, I have thought that this might be part of a game, but I quickly got rid of those thoughts. I don't think he will do anything bad to me. After all, he knows that I will get mad and won't talk with him. Vince won't risk our friendship. Well, friendship with benefits. No matter what it is, I feel good, and I don't want to stop doing this. I know that it's not right, and the chances of getting in trouble are getting bigger, but I don't care. I am a girl and have my needs.

The weekend has officially started. I don't have plans, but I expect my mom to call Ricky or to invite his parents for dinner. I hope that she won't do it. Also, I was thinking about calling Vince, but I didn't know where we could go. Mom and dad have some work today and most of the time they will be outside. I don't want them occasionally to see me. If this happens, even Vince won't be able to help me. It's not like I will be dead for real, but my mom will get mad.

I walked to the window and saw that Vince was not in his room. I kind of wish that he had been here. Well, I can call him later. The thing is that whenever we do something, I feel weak. It's just that I enjoy it a lot. I know that it's wrong, but what am I supposed to do? He is the first boy with who I have done something like that. Ricky was going to have his chance if he didn't treat me so badly. Since Vince is not at home, I can talk with his mom. She might tell me what is going on with me. After all, she is a parent. I will gladly talk with my dad, but I know that he will tell mom. Mostly, she will make him. Dad is not a good liar.

I got ready and walked to Vince's house. It's better that Vince is not at home. I knocked on the door and his dad opened it. I won't lie that I expected his mom.

- Hi, mister Gray.

- Hey Emma. How can I help you? Vince is outside.

- I know. He wasn't in his room. Is miss Gray here?

- Yes, but not now. - he said, chuckling

- Can I talk with you then?

- Sure. Come in.

- Thank you.

He let me in and both of us walked to the kitchen. Mister Gray offered me biscuits, but I denied them. I'm not hungry. Now I don't know from where to start. I never thought that it would be that hard to talk about your feelings. Maybe it's because I don't understand myself. Sometimes I feel like an i***t.

- For what do you want to talk with me?

- It's about Vince.

- Did he do something? I won't be surprised.

- No, he didn't do anything. I just...

- Emma, are you ok?

- I don't know. Lately, I feel confused.

Mister Gray was about to say something, but the front door opened. It was his wife. She came to greet me and left her shopping bags on the kitchen counter. I decided to help her order her products. I just want to talk with someone about this, but I don't know how to explain it. Who knew that it was that hard? Soon mister Gray left to do his work.

- Emma, is there a problem? You don't look much in the mood.

- I wanted to talk with you about something.

- Ok, I'm listening to you.

- It's that... I...

- Why don't we sit?

- Yeah, it would be better.

- What has happened?

- Vince.

- Did he hurt you?

- No, he didn't do anything bad.

- Then why do you look upset?

- Because lately, I feel weird. It's like I want us to be all the time together and not to share him with anyone. I know that it's wrong, but what do I have to do? I can't control this.

- I think that I know what is going on with you.

- What? Please tell me.

- I might be wrong, but I think that you are falling for Vince. Am I right?

- What? No, this is impossible. We are just friends.

- Are you sure? Weren't you friends with benefits?

- Ok, same thing. What I am trying to say is that we are not dating, and I don't have the right to feel this way.

- Sometimes, our feelings are stronger than our brains. No matter how much you tell yourself that this is wrong, your heart will know what is right for you. To be honest, I am glad that a girl finally likes my son. With his attitude, I thought that this would never happen.

- Vince is not a bad boy.

- Now, yes. Before he was getting himself in trouble. Not that much. What I didn't like was that he used girls.

- So what do I have to do?

- To be open and tell him the truth.

- I'm sorry, but I can't do that.

- Why? There is nothing wrong to like someone.

- I know, but in my situation, it's impossible. You know what I mean.

- Stop listening to what other people tell you and listen to your heart. It knows better what is good for you.

- You know that this means continuing hiding.

- Do you want to be happy?

- Yes, I do.

- Then? If you want to reach full happiness, follow your feelings.

- What if he doesn't like me?

- I think that he does. Up to now, I haven't seen him with one girl for so long.

- I will try, but it won't be easy.

- If you don't try, you will never know the answer.

I talked with miss Gray for a while. She told me many things about Vince. We might spend a lot of time together, but we never talk about personal things. Mostly he. I have told him the main thing about myself. Soon Vince came home. He looked surprised to see me there. For that, I received a hug.

- Can I know what you are doing here?

- I came to see you.

- Why didn't you call me?

- Because then it won't be a surprise.

- Let's say that I believe you.

- Don't you?

- No comment. What are your plans for the day?

- I don't have one, but I don't know my parents' ones. If you know what I mean.

- Sadly, I do. Well, in that case, I suggest you go to your room and come to mine on my way.

- Mom and dad are not at home.

- Oh, ok then. You can stay here. - he said, chuckling

- I won't deny a movie in bed.

- On your services, milady.

Both of us walked to his room. Vince took his laptop and laid down. I used the chance to snuggle. Is it I or is he wearing a woman's perfume? Maybe he was with a girl. Why do I care? As I have said, we are not dating, so he can be with whoever he wants. Well, this doesn't mean that I can't ask.

- Weird question, but why are you with a woman's perfume?

- Oh, no. Does it still smell?

- A little bit. Why?

- Probably you won't believe me, but I accidentally took my mom's perfume this morning.

- Thank god.

- What?

- Nothing. How did you not see that it was hers?

- Well, I sprayed myself first, and later when I felt the smell, I realized what I had done. I was thinking about putting some of mine to cover it, but this was only going to make it worse. Please don't tell anyone.

- My mouth is shut.

Vince has no idea how happy I am to hear this. I prefer his mom's perfume instead of a random girl's one. During the whole movie, I was snuggling into him. It's not my fault that he is a comfy pillow. I looked at him and saw that he was sleeping. I have to say that he is one of the boys who sleep cute. Well, I haven't seen other boys sleeping. Not in real life. It was only on TV. I moved myself to the other pillow and continued to look at him. I kissed him and realized that he wasn't sleeping at all. Well played. Vince quickly came on top to make sure that I wouldn't go anywhere. It's not like I will do it.

- What?

- Nothing.

- It doesn't look like that. I have the feeling that you will do something.

- So? Why do you care?

- Because I don't know is it what I think it is.

- Maybe. It depends on what you are thinking about.

I didn't say anything and looked at him. Here we go again. Vince didn't even do anything, but I am already weak. Maybe his mom is right, which means that I will be in big trouble. It's not like I am not now. If mom finds out about this, I will be dead. Something that I don't want to happen. Vince put one of his hands on my cheek, and I felt how my whole body shivered. Why is he teasing me? Just do it already. I saw that he was about to pull away, but I didn't let him. Since he won't give me what I want, I will take it by myself. I pulled him close and kissed him. I felt a smirk through the kiss, which means that I have been played again. Now, I don't care about this. I have my needs, and only Vince can help me. I have the feeling that soon I might give in.

- It's better if I stop now.

- If that's what you want.

- I can continue, but I don't know if you will like it.

- Um... I'm good.

- I was thinking the same.

- Can we take a nap?

- Sure. When will your parents be home?

- I don't know, and I don't care. - I said, and he laughed

- Ok, then. Come here. - he said and pulled me for a hug

- Thank you.

Very soon, I fell asleep. Vince has no idea how good it feels to be in his arms. I have to tell him how I feel, but I'm afraid that he might not feel the same. What if this ruins our friendship? I don't want it to happen. Moreover, hiding a friend is easier than hiding a boyfriend. It's not like Vince doesn't act like one. I mean that in the movies, the boys always come through the window. My neighbor is doing the same. Even I learned how to do it. I just don't want to get grounded again, because then, I won't be able to see him at all. Mostly because my mom will probably call Ricky. Like I need a babysitter. Let's hope that nothing of this will happen. I am not ready to let Vince go away from me. Not yet.