Dark Secrets Untold

Heart to Heart

Julie walked into her bedroom and put her bag down next to the bed and sat down.

She started looking around the room lost in thought, so much had changed since she was last here... not her room though that was still the same as ever; the light blue curtains at the window and bare white walls with the blue banner around that matched the curtains. Yes, everything was still here even the photo of her father on the bedside cabinet... Why hadn"t she met someone who was as good as him? She knew it was her own fault; The guy had a history... yes, a history she was trying to help him over. But still, the things he did, affected her family... Julie knew her own father would be turning in his grave over what she had done.

"May I come in?"

Julie slowly turned her head back around to see her mother standing in the doorway with a weak smile on her face. She nodded her head and Susan walked over to and sat down beside her.

"It"s really nice to have you home again." Susan reached her hand out and slowly removed a strand of Julie"s hair that had fallen in front of her face and tucked it back behind her ear) "How are your studies going?" Susan continued to ask when her daughter didn"t answer her.

Julie tried to smile, but she knew it was a weak one... ever since that night over 3 months ago, she hadn"t once smiled properly. Robin her roommate had mentioned that she wasn"t as cheerful as she used to be. "Fine," Julie said before she let out a long quiet sigh.

Susan started looking around the room trying to find something else to get Julie to talk to her. Susan slowly stood up and stood in front of Julie facing her, but not quite looking at her... It seemed to hurt Susan too much to look her daughter in the eye. "Well, as you can see I"ve kept your room as you left it... I"ve even kept it nice and clean for you," Susan added as an afterthought.

"Thanks, mum," Julie said very quietly as she stood up and walked over to the window ledge, where she sat down and began staring out at the street below.

"This place never changes."

"Just the people living here," Julie said thinking about herself.

Susan knew who her daughter was talking about "We all change sometime... it"s the only way we cope with things." Susan was glad she now had Julie talking to her and was determined to get everything out of her.

"And sometimes not for the better," Julie said as she continued to look out the window.

Susan knew she had to tread softly, or Julie would shut herself away again. "We all make mistakes in life."

Julie looked up at Susan with a sad look on her face. "What about ones that affect the whole family?"

Susan guessed she was talking about the baby "Yes, even those ones... that"s why we need family, so they can help us put things right again," She added as an afterthought, Susan knew she had to get her daughter"s trust again and let her know she will always be there. Susan made her way over to Julie and sat in front of her. "So let me help you through this." Susan gently placed her hands on Julie"s hands that were now resting in her lap.

"You won"t want to help me" Julie looked back out the window again.

Susan couldn"t believe what Julie had said... She had always been there for her daughter. Julie always came first in her eyes. "How can you say that? I"m your mother."

"I"ve betrayed the whole family." Julie turned back to look out the window again, she couldn"t bring herself to face her mother for a moment longer.

"Having a baby doesn"t do that." Susan realised that Julie was closing in on herself again and she couldn"t have that. "All the families out there mostly had kids, and I would say it"s made them all a lot closer." Susan hoped that would do the trick.

"Well, mine won"t!" Julie responded in a quite tone.

"Remember you were a baby once and look how you turned out" Susan quickly added.

Julie looked back at Susan "Yeah, look how I turned out." she looked down at her bump " A baby with no father..."

"...That doesn"t mean you have to give the baby up," Susan quickly interrupted Julie. She could tell where this was heading "I raised you as a single mum," Susan added hoping if she brought up the past and how they became the best of friends.

"At least dad was there when I needed him." Julie knew what her mother was trying to do, but she knew her upbringing would be totally different to raising this baby inside her.

Julie had always been fond of her father, not realising what he was more interested in "Believe me, when you were younger your father was more interested in his secretary then raising you." Susan hated reminding Julie of the past with her father but somehow she had to convince her daughter that what was she was planning, was wrong.

Julie couldn"t believe what her mother was saying, even though she should be used to this... her mother always went on about how much of a bad husband he was, but her father had meant everything to her. "How can you talk about dad like that? Dad"s gone so let him rest in peace," Julie said in an annoying tone, she was so fed up of all this.

"I"m only saying he wasn"t a saint as much as you might think he was."

At that moment, Julie stood up and faced Susan with an angry look on her face. "I remember how you use to tell me what a lousy husband he was." Julie hated being like this to her mother, but she wouldn"t have this, her father meant the world to her... she just wished she had a father like that for her own baby. "Do you think it was easy listening to you say how bad a person dad was?"

Susan knew if she weren"t careful there was a chance she could lose Julie forever, so she stood up in front of Julie and tried to think of a way to calm her down.

"Dad might not have been perfect, but at least he was there for me." Julie continued to go on before she looked back down at her bump... wishing and praying it would just disappear. "Which is more than I can say for this one"s father," She finally added.

Julie slowly lifted her head to face her mum and Susan saw tears sliding down her cheeks "Oh, Honey!" Susan slowly approached Julie and carefully wrapped her arms around her daughter. "I"m sorry!" Julie took that moment to fell against her mother. "I shouldn"t have said that about your father. You"re right, the most important thing was him being there for you, but it still doesn"t mean you have to give up this baby."

Julie quickly lifted her head and looked up into Susan"s face. "Haven"t you listened to a word I"ve said?" Julie thought her mother had started to understand her, but now she was just throwing it all back in her face again.

"Of Course I have, sweetheart."

Julie takes a couple of steps away from Susan "No you haven"t…... Listen to me mother, I don"t want this baby, and I want nothing to do with it. Once it"s gone the better." Once that happens she can move on and forget everything, up to this moment.

Susan slowly shakes her head "What as happened to you, this isn"t like you at all?" Susan asked with disappointment on her face.

"I went and got myself pregnant by the worst man alive," Julie answered with sadness.

"Worst man alive!"

"Yes mother, you heard right; the worst man alive. God, what was I thinking!" Julie could feel a headache coming on so she turned and walked over to the bed and laid herself down with an arm over her eyes, hoping it would give her some relief.

Susan now knew who to blame for all this and she couldn"t let things go on like this. "I insist you tell me who this guy is, right this very minute!" Susan demanded. Julie continued to lay there as if she didn"t her mother, which was one thing Susan couldn"t stand, especially from her own daughter. "Do you hear me, Julie Meyer?"

At that moment, Julie slowly lifted her arm a little and peeps up at her mum. "I can"t tell you," Julie finally said.

"Why can"t you tell me? If you do I could go and give him a piece of my mind." Susan tries to smile a little, hoping Julie would think she was teasing.

"You don"t want to be doing that," Julie said as she lowered her arm back down.

Susan truly couldn"t believe what she was hearing, how could her own daughter get involved with a guy as bad as this. "And why not? No one upsets my daughter and gets away with it." Susan realised she had the silent treatment again. "Just tell me who he is?"

Still no response from Julie, so Susan tried once more. "If you tell me, I promise not to yell at you." Hoping that Julie was just too scared to answer her.

"As I said earlier it doesn"t matter, I"m having it adopted, so once it"s gone, it will make no difference," Julie said very quietly.

Susan wasn"t sure if she had heard correctly, but from the way Julie was still acting, she must have done. Susan stepped closer and stood right over Julie staring right down at her "How could you talk about your baby like that? It"s not the baby"s fault that you had s*x with the wrong guy." Susan couldn"t deal with this any longer so she makes her way back over to the bedroom door.

Julie removed her arm and watched her mother walk away. "Mum," she said very quietly.

Susan noticed that Julie"s voice was all choked up and it made her turn back to face her who was now sitting up on the bed facing her with a worried look on her face. Susan was determined to stand her ground this time. "Believe me, I will find out who he is if it"s the last thing I do, and when I do he won"t know what hit him. I don"t care who he is, but believe me, he is going to pay big time for what he has turned you into."

"Oh mum, you don"t know what you saying," Julie slowly started shaking her head.

Susan didn"t want to hear no-more excuses, not until she found out who this guy was.

Julie watched as her mother turned around and disappeared down the corridor. Julie slowly falls back down on the bed staring up at the ceiling "Oh mum, he still hasn"t forgiven you for what you did," Julie mumbled to herself as more tears slide down her cheeks.