Dear CEO, I'm not a man

I used to think the world made sense to people who paid attention. I was wrong. The world stopped making sense the moment I became a walking lie in someone else's company. I sat frozen at my desk, staring at the computer screen while the fluorescent lights above me buzzed faintly. The air smelled like coffee, printer ink, and the expensive perfume someone had apparently decided to bathe in that morning. My fingers rested on the keyboard. They were trembling. I slowly curled them into fists beneath the desk. Elena Carter, you have really lost it. I swallowed. Let's just get ready to die. "You really made it here, huh?" A whisper brushed the back of my ear. I nearly jumped out of my chair. I turned to find Ben standing behind me, wearing the most irritating grin I'd ever seen on a human being. My best friend. My childhood nuisance. My biggest supporter. And, apparently, the person most excited to watch me die. "I should take a picture of your face and send it to Zara," he whispered. "She wouldn't want to miss this for the world." I glared at him. If I wasn't already one nervous breakdown away from collapsing, I would have strangled him with my bare hands. "Weren't you the one who talked me into this?" I whispered. "Because I couldn't find a job anywhere?" "Yeah." He dropped into the chair beside me like we were having a perfectly normal conversation. "But I said it as a joke. I didn't think you'd actually apply to this company, disguise yourself as a guy, and then get hired by the one CEO who has an instant allergy to women." He paused. His grin widened. "Good luck killing him and getting yourself killed." Then he stood and walked away. Just like that. No remorse. No guilt. No, I'm sorry for ruining your life. Nothing. I watched him disappear between the rows of desks, my jaw tightening. Betrayal. Pure betrayal. My palms were damp. I rubbed them against my trousers and forced myself to breathe. Ben was right. Zara and Ben had both tried to stop me. They really had. But in my world, I had two choices. Die because of debt... Or die the moment someone discovered I was a woman in this office. Either way, death had somehow become part of my career plan. And it was all because of Victor. I closed my eyes. His name alone left a bitter taste in my mouth. I never should have dated a man so far above my league. At first, I thought I was living the dream office romance. Stolen lunches. Late-night messages. Secret meetings. His fingers brushed mine beneath conference tables. His voice dropped whenever he called me after midnight. The kind of relationship that made you believe you'd somehow won at life. Then I discovered I wasn't the only woman in his life. When I confronted him, he didn't even look surprised. He just smiled. "I'll make you come back to me." I thought it was an empty threat. It wasn't. After I ended things, doors started closing. Companies that had previously shown interest suddenly stopped replying. Interviews disappeared. Applications were rejected before anyone had even spoken to me. People I'd never met somehow knew exactly who I was. Victor had quietly made sure I couldn't get hired. He had the money. The connections. The influence. I had none of those things. Eventually, desperation became stronger than fear. So I stopped trying to get hired as Elena Carter. I created someone else. Eli Carter. The name was close enough to answer without accidentally exposing myself. My hair was cut short and styled differently. I bound my breasts, then pulled on loose shirts and structured jackets that hid every curve I couldn't afford anyone to notice. I'd spent hours practicing a lower voice. I practiced in the shower. In front of the mirror. On phone recordings. Over and over until my own voice sounded strange to me. The documents were fake, but believable. The employment history was carefully constructed. And the interview? I'd spent three sleepless nights memorizing everything I could find about the company. I wasn't going to let one mistake ruin everything. Unfortunately... That "someone else" I'd created now worked in the most dangerous company in the city. Under a CEO who reportedly reacted to women the way fire reacted to gasoline. And I was sitting less than ten minutes into my first day, pretending my heartbeat wasn't auditioning for a horror movie soundtrack. Then a man's voice thundered through the hallway. "Send in a new secretary before the end of the day, or do the work yourself! I don't care how you divide your body, but the work must be done!" I flinched. The sound seemed to vibrate through the glass walls. I turned toward the hallway. A man was standing outside one of the offices, his voice carrying through the entire floor. I mean... Did these people think they owned the entire building? My heart was already fighting for survival, and now someone was screaming like a mafia boss who had just lost a shipment. "But, sir, it's impossible to get a replacement immediately. We need at least four days..." "Ken." The man's voice dropped. Cold. Controlled. Somehow, that was worse. "Read my lips carefully." The hallway went still. I couldn't see Ken's face clearly from my desk, but I could see his shoulders stiffen. A dangerous pause followed. "I." The man's jaw tightened. "Don't." His eyes narrowed. "Care." The door slammed. BANG! I jumped so hard my chair squeaked against the floor. And suddenly... The entire office transformed. People who had been secretly eavesdropping snapped back to their desks. Keyboards began clicking. Papers shuffled. Phones started ringing. One man opened Excel with the seriousness of someone trying to save humanity. I blinked. What the hell had just happened? Five seconds ago, half the office had been practically leaning out of their chairs to listen. Why did it suddenly feel like judgment day? I hadn't even been assigned work yet, so I sat there with my hands folded awkwardly in my lap while everyone around me entered survival mode. Then my phone vibrated. Ben. I glanced at the message. If you value your life, find something to do immediately before they pick you as the sacrifice for the CEO. My eyes widened. Oh. So that was why everyone suddenly looked like hardworking citizens of society. They weren't busy. They were hiding. Fantastic. I looked around. I didn't know what I was doing, but I also didn't want to die on my first day. I pushed my chair back. The wheels scraped softly against the floor. I stood and approached the nearest employee. "Oh, let me help you print that," I offered desperately. "I'm really good at... printing." The man slowly looked up. His expression said I had personally offended his ancestors. "Get a grip, man," he snapped. Before I could respond, he shoved past me. "I'm trying to save myself too!" I lost my balance. My shoe caught against the leg of a chair. And then… THUD. I hit the floor. Silence. Wonderful. What a powerful first impression. My palms stung against the cold tile. Somewhere behind me, someone coughed. I pushed myself upright, trying desperately to pretend I hadn't just been publicly defeated by a chair. Then a voice came from behind me. "Looks like you're the only one not busy at the moment." Deep. Calm. Dangerously close. The entire office went silent. Again. I froze. Slowly, I turned around. It was the man from earlier. The assistant-looking one. Judging by the relief spreading across everyone's faces, I had just been selected as this month's office tribute. Wow. God really said, Let's make this entertaining. I glanced at the man who had shoved me earlier. He was watching me with genuine pity. I almost forgave him. Almost. "Hurry up," the assistant said. "The CEO is waiting." My stomach dropped. My fingers went cold. If that terrifying man from earlier was the CEO... Then I was finished. Men feared him. Women avoided him. And I was currently both a male... and illegally a female. Amazing combination. My legs felt strangely weak as I stood. "So much for avoiding the CEO on my first day." "Sir..." I swallowed. My mouth had suddenly gone dry. "I just resumed today, so I don't really think I'm qualified to..." "That's perfect." He interrupted so quickly that I stopped talking. Too quickly. Relief flashed across his face. "We can just say I hired you this morning." Something about that sounded illegal. "But, sir..." "It's either you take the job or quit." I stared at him. He stared back. Then he lowered his voice. "And just so you know, the salary is three times your current pay." My brain stopped working. Three times? I could practically hear the calculator in my head exploding. A second ago, I had been preparing to run. Now I was considering signing my life away. I studied his face carefully. He was trying to look professional. But his eyes... His eyes looked like a man begging for rescue. Which meant one thing. This job was cursed. Still... I needed the money. Badly. My family's debt wasn't going to disappear because I was scared. I could survive this for a year. Maybe two. Save enough money. Pay everything off. Then disappeared before anyone discovered that Eli Carter was actually Elena Carter. I took a slow breath. My fingers tightened around the edge of my jacket. "Fine." The assistant's shoulders visibly relaxed. "Good." He turned toward the CEO's office. I followed. Each step felt heavier than the last. The closer I got to those doors, the louder my heartbeat became. Thump. Thump. Thump. I swallowed hard. Maybe I could do this. Maybe I could survive. Maybe nothing would go wrong. I reached the door. My hand hovered over the handle. Really... What's the worst that could happen?