The Cost of Feelings

Anita’s little brown fingers drummed against the worn handle of her suitcase show casing her pink polished nails as she stood at the edge of the driveway, watching her childhood home shrink in the rearview mirror. The house with its faded red bricks,the rusted roof that leaked during the rainy season,the crooked mailbox her father never fixed for ages which was now the roster's resting place, and the old oak tree that had almost shade half of it's leaves casting shadows over the yard—all of it felt small now, like a postcard from another life. All she could hear was her mother's , sister's and friend's voices fading away as the car hit the road.She knew that her world was about to change, yet the excitement felt tangled with something she couldn’t name but the unknown feeling did slap her so hard. As the car rolled further from home ,Anita could not hear the playlist that she had requested her father to play her.She had put on her thinking face staring blankly at the window as a number of questions filled her mind making her unable to process anything, Would she find her place at university?A drop of sweat appeared at her temples and, although it seemed impossible, her frown got even deeper as she pondered on what would happen when she left the comfort of familiar faces .The thrill of independence was suddenly laced with a pang of unease she hadn’t expected. She was headed toward a world where no one knew her story, and she wasn’t quite sure who she was going to be when she got there.Suddenly her face relaxed and her eyes started twinkling, “I got it”, she cried out.'as her father hugged her The city skyline finally came into view,the bustling city streets were alive with the sounds of honking horns and the chatter of pedestrians hurrying to their destinations.The towering skyscrapers of the city skyline stood as monuments to human ingenuity and progress, shimmering with promise and possibility. For a moment, Anita closed her eyes and let herself imagine it: the campus lights, the rush of new faces, the thrill of reinventing herself. She had no idea what was waiting for her, but she was ready—or so she thought.In a blink of an eye they had arrived at their destination. Anita alighted the car as her Dad helped her with her suitcase.Her heart racing with a mix of excitement and anxiety. The sprawling campus stretched before her, a vibrant tapestry of brick buildings interwoven with lush green lawns and shaded walkways.The University building was not just an architectural wonder but symbolized a dream that lingered in Anita's memory . The air was alive with the sounds of laughter, animated conversations, and the distant echo of a band practicing for an upcoming event. It was a world far removed from the quiet rhythms of her village, where the only sounds were the rustling leaves,the noises of the water flowing in a nearby river and the calls of familiar birds. As Anita took her first steps onto the campus after she had bid her dad goodbye, the scent of fresh grass mingled with the rich aroma of coffee wafting from a nearby cafeteria, pulling her deeper into this new reality. The sun bathed everything in a golden glow, illuminating the faces of students bustling by, each absorbed in their own worlds. She watched as sleek cars glided up to the entrance—shiny black sedans and luxury SUVs, their polished exteriors reflecting the sunlight like diamonds. Each vehicle seemed to exude a sense of privilege and status, pulling up to the curb with an effortless grace. The doors opened to reveal students stepping out, clad in designer clothes that whispered wealth and exclusivity. One girl emerged from a bright red sports car, her hair cascading over her shoulders like silk, dressed in a fitted, pastel blazer and tailored trousers that accentuated her poised demeanor. Another young man, in a crisp button-down shirt and designer jeans, laughed with a group of friends, his expensive watch glinting in the light. As Anita was walking through the blocks to the admission office she felt the weight of her own clothing, a faded hand-me-down shirt with frayed ends and jeans that had seen better days, was pressing down her. As she noticed the interested looks from the stylish crowd, she automatically pulled at the hem of her shirt, a faint flush beginning to appear on her cheeks. Their self-assured walks and laughing served as a reminder of her origins as a scholarship student and a sharp contrast to the colorful world of affluence that was taking place all around her. Yet, amidst the whirlwind of well-dressed students, she noticed something that grounded her. Despite their polished exteriors, their faces were painted with a mix of excitement and anxiety, mirroring her own in the admission office. As they gathered in clusters, chatting and exchanging social media handles, she realized they too were stepping into the unknown, each with their own dreams and fears. After all the processes were done ,the new students were shown to their hostels whereby each person had a roommate.Anita arrived first in the assigned room and started arranging her few belongings to one side of the drawers where she was done in a couple of minutes . She threw herself on the bed and took a deep breath, the crisp air filling her lungs with determination. This was her moment to forge her path, to weave her story into the tapestry of this bustling campus. She straightened her shoulders, ready to embrace the unfamiliar, knowing that her worth could not be measured by the clothes she wore or the car she arrived in. She was here to learn, to grow, and to find her place among the bright lights and big dreams