A Different Light

Chapter 2

Tobias POV 

I sat at the table, taking the towel from my shoulder, and I fill a plate with eggs and pancakes. I smother my pancakes in syrup and catch Hannah wrinkling her nose. She always hated syrup unless it was fruit flavored and prefers to drench her pancakes in butter. I purposefully cut into my pancakes and swirl it in excess syrup before popping it in my mouth. Mr. Silver interrupts us by clearing his throat. 

"So how have you been, Tobias?" he asks, shoving a forkful of eggs in his mouth afterwards. 

"Can't complain, Mr. Silver. Been playing football a bit, working out a lot, and I visit my uncle every now and then.." I trial off as a knowing look crosses his face, he knows my uncle became abusive shortly after my parents died..they were the ones who helped me get him behind bars. 

"Do you not own a shirt?" Hannah says to me and a smile crosses my face. 

"Why? Are you done enjoying the view?" I ask, crossing my arms over my chest. 

She doesn't answer and simply rolls her eyes while her face flushes a deep pink. Her mother gives me a knowing smile and her dad pretends not to notice. I continue eating, shoveling forkful after forkful of eggs into my mouth. It's been a while since I had groceries to actually cook a decent meal. We all eat, relaxed conversations drifting in and out, and for the first time in a long time, I felt a semblance of belonging and family. I caught Hannah looking at me over her glass of orange juice and winked at her, grinning. She rolls her eyes and looks away quickly. 

Longing stabs at my heart. I've missed this. 

Hannah POV

Tobias shirtless is a sight for sore eyes. He was always cute and gawky but he filled out and shot up. He's a huge mountain of muscle that I'm sure has been explored by plenty of girls before. I study his face out of the corner of my eye- his stubble, the angles of his face, the dimples in his cheeks, his thick eyebrows over golden eyes, his black hair cut short, his sharp nose..and how easily he smiles. I have to remind myself that he isn't my best friend anymore, and that we hate each other. He catches me looking at him and winks at me. 

And then it hits me. We're going to be stuck together for another 4 f*****g years. 

I shove some eggs in my mouth along with a few bites of a pancake and excuse myself from the table.

"I'm gonna head upstairs and shower and stuff. I'm still kinda tired," I announce, standing. 

"That's fine, but don't think you're off the hook- we are going to talk about what happened yesterday," my dad says sternly. s**t. s**t s**t s**t. 

"Aren't you going to thank Tobias for breakfast?" my mom says, gushing at him. For f**k's sake woman, your husband is right next to you! 

"Thanks, Tobers," I tell him, using his old nickname. I get satisfaction at the wince I see in response. 

I head for the stairs and head up, getting lightheaded after a few steps. I don't know what drugs I was given but I don't think I would ever want to try them recreationally. Finally I make it to the top and hunch over, breathing hard, with a headache blooming somewhere in my head. 

I head to the bathroom and beeline for the medicine cabinet- eureka! Iburprofen. I dry swallow 3 pills and turn on the shower, waiting for it to warm up then stripping off my clothes. It felt good to get out of the stupid paper thin hospital "gown" but now I feel all grimy. I can't stop thinking about Tobias- or more accurately the fight we had the summer before freshman year. I still remember the words he said, they stayed with me the last 4 years. 

"I just don't understand why you won't talk to me! I'm your best friend!" he yelled at me. 

"No you're not. Not anymore. I need new friends- girl friends. Girls who understand me and what I'm going through!" I tell him. 

He had been getting weird the whole summer- I couldn't even wear a swim suit around him anymore without him getting this funny look on his face. When I asked my mom about it, she told me it was time for new friends. I was heartbroken because Tobias was always my best friend. She insisted though, and told me that she didn't want me going around his house, either, because of his uncle. 

"I can't be friends with you anymore," I tell him, biting my lip. 

"You don't mean that, Nana. C'mon. I can't lose you...not after I just lost...them," he said, his voice cracking with emotion as he used my nickname. He hasn't talked about his parents since their funeral. 

"Tobias, mom said that I can't even go over to your house anymore. And your uncle won't let you stay here- there's not much of a friendship left anyways! And sometimes you get mean...you scare me," I insist. I feel horrible the whole time. 

"Why? Why does everybody have to leave me?" he asks and I want to give him a tight hug, but then his face changes and he scowls at me. This anger is new since his uncle started taking care of him, and once he lashed out and hit me, but I never told anyone. He sits there scowling at me, and a feeling of fear creeps over me. 

"Fine. I don't need you... I don't need anyone. I f*****g hate you," he spits at me. 

"You don't mean that, Tobers. C'mon," I say, my eyes welling up with tears. 

"No. I do, Hannah. I hate you," he says and he starts walking away from me. 

"Fine! You know what? I hate you to. Do you hear me Tobias?? I HATE YOU!!" I scream at his retreating figure. 

I ran home after that, tears streaming down my face and I ran upstairs and straight into my bed, sobbing into my pillows. That school year, Tobias was in and out of the principles office for fights was on the verge of expulsion when my parents stepped in. They found out Tobias was being severely abused- emotionally, physically, and sexually. My parents wouldn't tell me any details when it happened, but Tobias was put into foster care, and the state wouldn't allow my parents to adopt him. He got to stay in our town though and was given the help he needed. Slowly he became less angry and more social. Then he discovered football and never looked back. We shared some AP classes, too, and I know he did very well in them. I did, too, hence my acceptance to Auburn University. 

I realize I've been sitting in the bathroom staring at the wall with the shower on while naked for some time. I quickly get in the shower and let the waterfall cascade down my body. It feels so so good. I shampoo and condition my hair, shave, and then wash my body before shutting the water off and wrapping a towel under my arms and one up around my hair. The bathroom is super steamy thanks to my trip down memory lane so I just decide to exit and get back to my room to change as I can't even see my reflection in the mirror through the thick cloud of steam. As I walk out of the bathroom, I overhear my parents and Tobias talking by the door. 

"Please watch out for her. You know how she is...she doesn't always think things through," my mother tells him. 

"And make sure she doesn't meet some asshole that doesn't treat her right. Kick his ass, if she does end up with someone," my dad adds. 

"Heh. She's a big girl, Mr and Mrs Silver. I think she will be okay," Tobias says and shifts uncomfortably. Great. 

My dad pulls out his wallet and hands Tobias a few bills. 

"No sir, you will not pay me to protect Hannah," Tobias said. 

"Good. Because this is for staying with Harper. But I'm happy to hear you agree to watch out for my eldest at school as well," dad said with a grin. 

Tobias sighed, defeated, and my dad handed him the money. I slipped into my bedroom and closed the door, leaning against it.  So not only do I have to be at the same school with my ex-best friend, but I also have to deal with him policing me all the time. I couldn't even feel angry, though, it was so sweet of my parents to be so protective of me. Plus I still had a lingering headache. I went to my dresser and pulled out a pair of sweats and a big t shirt, then I climbed right in bed. I'm a person who can appreciate naps and I'm not ashamed of it- especially when I just got out of the hospital. I think I deserve a good, long nap. I laid my head on my pillow and just as I was falling into a nice deep sleep I heard something hit my window. My eyes opened and I turned over. This time I could see a shadow of something come up and hit the window again. I got up and pulled the window open. It was Tobias. 

"What the hell do you want?" I ask him. 

He just grins up at me. 

"Sleep well, sweetheart," is all he says to me. Asshole.