A Different Light

Hannah POV  The loud music was pounding through my chest. The lights that were dancing around the room made it hard to see where I was supposed to be walking. Mix in the alcohol I've consumed and the fact I am dancing on a table and you basically have the perfect recipe for disaster.  "Take off your shirt," one of the disgusting jocks I always see in the school weight room yells at me. "Yeah!!" All the guys in the general vicinity agree.  I turn around and hop down, holding my head as the wobbles set in. Oof. I need some water or soda or food. I walk into the kitchen and grab a diet Dr. Pepper. There's a crock pot of cheese dip sitting on the counter. I hop up with a loaf of bread and a plate. I scoop out the cheesy dip with a slice of bread and happily munch on that between sips of soda. Cheese, carbs, and alcohol are the key to mending a broken heart. My mind drifted to the thoughts I was trying so hard to escape from. Unwanted images of Lennox's face while he dumped me swarmed my mind. I hopped off the counter, and noted that my butt was numb. How long had I been sitting there eating cheese? I shrugged and walked outside, feeling only slightly better. Heartbreak is a strange beast to tame. I leaned against the railing, enjoying the view when suddenly someone's arms were around me, caging me against the railing.  "What's pretty thing like you doing in a place like this?" a husky voice whispered in my ear.  I turned around quickly, accidentally headbutting whomever was behind me. "Oh God, I'm sorry!" I tell him, holding my forehead and wincing.  "Heh, it's uh, fine," Blake tells me. He's head of the football team. This can only mean one thing- he's f*****g with me.  "Look, I don't know what game you want to play, but you'll have to find another contestant," I look him in the eye and set my jaw.  "Whoa there, feisty. Who says I'm playing a game?" he shifts ever so slightly and I can see people behind him watching us, some laughing.  "The crowd behind you, staring and giggling. Leave me alone," I say, and stare pointedly at his arm. He moves it with a pissed off look on his face.  "See this is why you're still a bitchy virgin nobody wants. Fuckin prude ass ugly b***h," he crosses his arms with a smirk.  "Hmmm. It lashes out upon rejection. I will note that in my field diary under 'wild colossal dickface'," I reply, turning and going back inside. I don't know what everyone's problem is with my not wanting to sleep with anyone. I realize I lost my soda somewhere along the way and grab a bottle of water on my way past the kitchen. It opens with ease and I take a long drink, chugging almost the whole thing in one go. It had a funky after taste but I didn't think much of it then. Oh no- not then.  Fast forward what felt like 15 minutes- the party was in full swing, and apparently so was I. Despite not having any more alcohol, the room was spinning faster than the earth, the lights were too bright and hurt my eyes. I was locked in a bathroom with my jacket over my face. There was a loud, frantic knocking on the door. "Go 'way," I yell from under my jacket.  God even my own voice hurts my head. I can hear whoever it is retreating. I curl up on the bathroom floor, the room still spinning behind my eyelids. I finally get some semblance of sleep, when suddenly I'm lifted off the ground.  "Oh no, put me down," I tell whoever is carrying me. The sway in their walk makes me feel like I'm inside of a tornado. Now I know how Dorothy felt in the Wizard of Oz.  "I gotta get you home. Your mother will kill me if she knows I was here with you and didn't bring you home when you needed it," the voice tells me. I know that voice.... "Tobias?!" I flip my jacket off my face and stare up at him. The light immediately hurts my eyes and makes me nauseous. I have a skull splitting headache.  His face got serious and he pulled my face up to his to look in my eyes. "f**k. We gotta get you to a hospital!" He yells and starts moving faster towards what I assume is his car.  Sure enough, he drops me in the front seat and gives me my jacket to cover up my face. The roar of the engine on his 67 Fastback Mustang makes me want to hurl.  "What's happening?" I ask from under the jacket. He ignores me and I think I can hear a phone ringing.  "Hello?" Is that my mom?? "Hi Mrs. Silver. It's Tobias. Tobias Steele."  "Oh? And to what do I owe this pleasure, Tobias?"  "I am taking Hannah to the hospital. We were at a party and someone spiked bottles of water," he tells her. I can feel his eyes on me.  "Oh God. What hospital?"  "Central Mercy," he says. "I will stay with her until you guys get there.  "Okay dear. We are on our way," she says, and you can tell she is talking in the bathroom. I try to focus on what was said. The water was..spiked? Water? I knew that bottle was too easy to open.  I groan as he takes a turn too fast. I seem to dive deeper into whatever other world I am descending into on whatever drug I was given. I can barely hear anything but the whooshing in my ears. The car stops all of a sudden and a door shuts before the one next to me opens and I am lifted again. The swaying walk is doing nothing for my drugged state.  "I think.. I'm going to puke," I say, and that's the last thing I remember before I descend into total darkness.  Tobias POV I sat in the uncomfortable hospital chair, holding Hannah's hand and studying her features. She had gorgeous blue eyes- though the last time I saw them, the pupils were the size of saucers, a little elf like nose that was spattered in freckles and pointed up a bit at the tip, high cheek bones, and full, soft lips. Her long blond hair looked like a golden halo when the sun hit it just right, but right now it looked almost dull beneath the industrial lights of the hospital.The steady beeping of the hospital monitors was almost lulling me to sleep when Hannah's parents crashed into the room. I quickly dropped her hand as they rushed to her side.  "Is she okay?" her father asked, not even looking at me.  "She's fine. The nurse could probably explain better than me, honestly," I told him.  "I'll go get a nurse," her mother said, leaving as quickly as she arrived.  Hannah took after her mother in a few ways but I always saw Hannah in her dad's face as opposed to her mother's. She got her mother's short height of 5'1, and her curvy body that fueled my juvenile imagination, but it was almost as though her and her father's faces were carved by the same sculptor, and both were quick to smile. That face now was drawn tight with worry, and I could see that a few more years had been added to his face. f**k, has it really only been 5 years?  "I found a nurse. She said she will be right in with the doctor," Hope said, ironically with a hopeful glow about her.  The whole family had H names- Harold, Hope, Hannah, and Hannah's little sister, Harper. Speaking of... "Who is watching Harper? If you want I can watch her- I can crash on your couch and stay with her for the night, so she knows who she is with," I offer, knowing they have no immediate family in the area.  "That.that would be great, Tobias. Thank you," Hope says, her eyes filling up with tears.  Harold came over and slipped me $50 then clapped me on the shoulder.  "I can't accept this, sir," I tell him.  "Sure ya can, kid. Think of it as gas and pizza money. Okay?" The way he's holding my gaze, the same way Hannah does when she is stubborn, makes me agree with a tight, forced smile. I start to walk out when a nurse walks in, and I catch the beginning of what she's telling them- the same thing she told me- "So far we see no permanent damage, but she was severely dehydrated and we don't know what she was given. We are just going to have to wait this out and see what Hannah decides. It's all up to her now." Bullshit. I make it outside and take a deep breath, walking towards my car. I get in, slam the door shut, and sigh loudly before firing her up and heading towards Hannah's. I hadn't been there since I once snuck out and knocked on Hannah's window that one fateful night. The night she decided she hated me.  "I just want to know why you refuse to talk to me!" I yelled at her.  "I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU I HATE YOU! JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!" she had screamed and screamed.  "But what did I do? Hannah, I don't even know what I did!" I insisted.  And she slapped me. She hit me across the face as hard as she could. To this day, I don't know what I did wrong... Maybe I never will. I pull into their empty driveway, the light illuminating the river rock that covers the bottom level of the house, with blue siding on top, big windows in every room are sandwiched between white shutters, and I make my way to the big red door that is lit by a small outdoor light on their spacious front porch. How many summers had we spent out here, swinging on the porch swing and drinking lemonade, making promises we never knew we couldn't keep. I shake my head and go to the front door- which is locked, and then I find the hide-a-key her mother keeps in the 3rd flower pot to the left of the door and let myself in. I close it quietly behind me and shrug out of my leather jacket, hanging it on the rack. The babysitter comes out into the living room, surprised to see me. Her gaze sweeps all the way up my body, and I feel a little self conscious about it. I still haven't grown used to being the 6'6" muscled beast that football turned me into and all the women seem to appreciate. "I'm here to take over for you and stay with Harper," I tell her.   She licks her lips and nods, "Uh she went to her room a while ago- she was scared and I didn't really know what to tell her."  "I'll get her to sleep. She can know the truth, Harold and Hope don't lie, so they would tell her tomorrow anyways," I say, looking up the stairs.  I can faintly see a light coming from somewhere up there. I place my hand on the deep blue wall and remove my shoes as to not scuff the hardwood floors that Hope spends hours cleaning. I feel a hand on my back and turn.  "Uhm. If you need anything or need help, here's my number," she says, handing me a slip of paper. I look at her and her face is flushed with a blush. I nod, taking it, knowing I don't need it.  "Thanks," I say, and I open the door for her.  She turns abruptly and I stop in my tracks. "Even if you don't..need me... You can text me anyways. Maybe we can hang out another time," she says to me.  "I actually will only be here for another few weeks. I leave for college football camp soon," I say and try to avoid her prying eyes.  "I-I know. You're Tobias Steele- football captain and quarterback on his way to the big leagues," she says.  "Uh..yeah... That's me. I'm not really looking for any more distractions right now. But if you want, Blake Holden probably is. You can find him on any social media platform. He enjoys taking pics of himself," I say and close the door in her face, locking it.  I head upstairs to tuck Harper in and let her know where I'll be if she needs me. I explain what happened to Hannah (in a way that a 5 year old would understand) and she gives me a big hug.  "Night kiddo. If you need me, I will be downstairs on the couch. Okay?" I say.  "Mmkay T," she says and snuggles into her bed. T. She never could say my name.  I descend the stairs and look at the pictures on the walls on my way down, my face growing solemn when I get about halfway down and see less and less pictures with me in them and more of Hannah and her b***h squad, Lacey, Mona, and Jessica. I roll my eyes, nothing could have been more detrimental to our friendship than those 3. All throughout the pictures I see Hannah getting prettier and prettier. I always thought she was beautiful but in a recent picture of her on their annual Hawaii vacation, she's in the sand building a castle with Harper, a big smile on her face and she truly is a knockout. I sigh and head to the kitchen to get water- and there I see it. Hannah's acceptance letter. To no other place than the college we always promised each other we would go to together- Auburn University. And she got a full ride scholarship for sports, just like me. And she leaves in 2 weeks...just like me. f**k. 4 more years with her? I thought that going away to school would be a clean slate and fresh start. But that just got a whole lot more complicated.