Am I Enough

Dahlia Mom: "Dahlia"!...."DAHLIA"! I've barely opened my eyes and my overbearing mother storms into my room and rips the curtains open; “Dahlia, get your ass out of bed and ready for school”. I peel my eyes open and stare out the window; the weather looks dark and almost unforgiving; but today marks my final year at the hellhole that is SpringPort High. I turned my head towards my phone and picked it up as I always do on a morning, and noticed that it was blowing up with messages and notifications for the school chat forum; opening it I couldnt believe my eyes. Plus, everywhere I have pictures I only recognise as ones that I sent to my boyfriend 3 years ago. I couldnt believe what I was seeing. What were they doing here? How! Why?! Without thinking, I dialed my boyfriend's number and after 2 rings he answered. Dahlia: “NOAH! WHAT THE F***K! HOW ARE MY PICTURES EVERYWHERE? DID YOU DO THIS”?! All I hear is sinister laughter down the phone, tears start to escape my eyes. “Why”? I asked timidly, trying to understand this cruel joke that the person I thought loved me had pulled Noah: “Why”? He giggled again “Why not plain and simple? I never loved you Dahlia, I just wanted to see how much you'd give me”, laughing again, he hung up the phone. I feel lost, heartbroken and betrayed; it wasn't really real, none of it, all those long nights talking about our future, all those “I love you’s”. It was fake. He didn't love me. He got what he wanted and then broke me, leaving me shattered without my dignity. I spent a good 45 minutes sobbing till my alarm went off telling me I had to set off to school. To tell the truth, I wanted to hide from the world. Never showing my face again, but reality hit. If I wanted to get out of this s****y town, I had to finish school, I had to finish school and go off to college where I could be free. I dragged myself out of bed and shuffled to my bathroom; taking a brisk shower and applying some light makeup to hide my red, puffy eyes. Taking the first thing out of my wardrobe; which happened to be a VERY oversized jumper dress, some tights and my chunky combat boots; scraping my hair up into a messy bun, I was ready to face everyone. Throwing my bag over my shoulder, I ran down the stairs and straight out the front door to my car. Driving to school felt like I was driving my way to the gates of hell; no wait I was. Parking and stepping out of my car, I felt everyone's eyes on me. I felt so small; I was the laughing stock of the entire school and it was barely 9:00 am. practically running through the car park sobbing: bumping into someone, I made my way to the the dark and gloomy halls to find Noah standing against my locker, sucking face at Charity, the tall, blonde, skinny cheerleading captain who, on a number of occasions, loved to make me aware of my place in this world I was, which was to lick the dirt I was her shoes and let her walk all over me because im “worthless”. I didn't think it was possible, but my heart broke even more. Why was this happening? This was supposed to be my year and in a mere 24 hours my whole life had gone to s**t. I felt tears trickle down my cheeks as Noah and I made eye contact; nothing, no emotion, no empathy, nothing but a dark smirk painted on his face as Charity nibbled on his ear. I had been in school a mere matter of minutes and I was already running to find somewhere to hide; my swollen eyes clouded with tears. I ran to the other end of school that was shut off for refurbishment and hid in one of the darkened classrooms. Collapsing onto the cold, tiled floor sobbing. I couldnt fathom what I had done to deserve this. Was it not enough for Noah?