The Boyfriend App

There are few words in the English language that come close to describing the intense fecling of being in love. There are even fewer words to express the unbearable torment of heartbreak. And the heartbreak Irom someones irst love? Forget it. But this was the precISe ernotion seventeen-year-old Rapunzel Kate Lapuz was experiencing inside a stall n the girls bathroom. Kate, who took pride in having English as her favorite subject and being called Ms. webster by her Enghsh teacher im junior high, Iound herself at a loss for words to describe what she was feeling. Outside, it was a sunny Thursday allernoon in sleepy Concepeion Integrated Tetchnolngy Sehool- High School on one of the 7, 641 tropical islands ol the Philhppines. 1or Kale though, it lelt like a giant hood had been slipped on top of the world, extinguishing all ght and sucking away all breath. Ilad the whole world in fact ended. that would've Solved a lot of thingS. At the top oI Kate's ist were iliation and social suicide. She couldn't Degin to comprehend the level of stupidity she had e was an nonor roll student but she fell for the oldest trick in the book: she fell in love with the bad bo But who was she kidding? There were no books Written about this. Her own ma, the loving and strong woman that she was, couldn't have warned her about us. Ana Kate s own rusty big brain? it it had hands, it would've washed them clean of all traces of this cFail. Her brain had known what was going to happen. Her brain had warned her that Josh Ventura couldnt be trusted, that he couldn't change. Being a player was in his nature. Her brain gave Kate plenty of heads-up but her heart was too happy to listen. Her heart-her big, fearless heart- had told her that when the day came, they would all deal with it together. The same way Kate had entered the relationship, she would leave it unburned and with eyes wide open. She had thought then that she would be ready now but it was clear nothing could've ever prepared her for the day. She wished she could thrust her hand inside her chest and massage her heart. She might as well yank the whole organ out and give it a telling-off. Or she'd try to figure out all the veins and arteries. They'd been studying DSL installation in ICT-11, so maybe she could figure out which wires went where and which ones were defective. Maybe then her eyes would stop gushing tears without her express permission. She tried to trace the point when everything had started to go wrong, right before they spiraled out of control. She kept thinking if she could identify such a point, things would somehow instantly get better Why was Josh so hateful to her? How could he dump her so unceremoniously and replace her with Bernadette? The Super Glue of all people! It was in the cafeteria Kate found out. She thought they were on the same side. She and him against the world. JOSH & KATE 4EVER in a heart pierced with cupid's arrow, like the extensive graffiti in that bathroom; now nothing but trashy and meaningless scrawls. How could Josh be so cruel? She thought he would never hurt her. He said so. He promised it. It was like she hadn't known him at all. Or he her. The more she recalled his familiar face - his long hair, thick eyebrows, dark brooding eyes and aquiline nose - the sharper the pain she felt. It was weird. The pain was emotional but it also bordered the physical. She kept rubbing her chest through her middy blouse as though that would ease it. She was having trouble breathing. She was crying sO much she was getting sick and wanted tO throw up. Ilow could something so beautiful cause her this much pain? Now Kate knew that burning fire lurked behind an angel's smile. She guessed everybody was talking about her right now. she rarely missed class arnd there was supposed to be a pop quiz in English today. Worse than the ntense feellngs of jealousy and hearthreak Was the numihaton. How could she muster the srength to come out of the bathroom ever again, hold her head nmgh and not let anynody see her swoilen eyes? she just hoped to go on with her life but even that option had been taken away rom her. Ma... he silently cried out as she thaught of her mother and how much she wanted to feel her embrace. If only she could teleport from the bathroom stall back to her bedroom, where she d stay forever. IIer ma: caring, ever supportive and intuitive. When she noticed Kate was walking on air the first few days of her relatonship, she had immediately guesed she was in love. At first. Kate tried to deny it but it seemed her ma knew her more than she did herself. She said she could see it in the glow of Kate's Skln and her uvely novemenits, she siept with her for the first time ina Wle and teasen ner apout it Her ma whispered to her that she was happy Kate had found love. She explained that love made everybody happier, gentler and altogether nicer people. Love could change even those who were birer and devoid of hope. But Kate s ma also warned that people were sometimes not who they sald they were. Beauty was only skin-deep. What matrered most was what was mside. what was invisible arnd essential, ike m the book The Little Prince, which her ma used to read to her when she was a kid. Why are you telling me these? Kate had asked her ma, still trying to deny the truth. wel, tr's because I care aboutyou so much and you rave a very bg heart You warna vust everyone arond you because you have so mIucn Love to give. And it's all right when youre with me and your close friends, but sooner or later you'll meet different AULLs o) people ard some wont be who you expect Ey are 1 dott want you to be disapponted and, most mportau, I aont wOt you to cnuge cwa (OSe yolu rusting character. Becaise thats the part I Love about you the most. The thought ok her tma and her warning, which Kate couldn't really make senise ok Tilly today, made her cry even more. She was quickly running out of pocket Tissue and even looked tissue Iron lie dispenser The Tears ust Kept pouring out ol her, sfhe th0ught she might llood the entre school il she kept at it. She couldnt stay in the bathroom forever though. The rough plan was to wait till the school closed and it got dark. she knew all anout the ghost stories but didnt Care about any ot those right now. She was so upset she thought she could strangle a ghost to death, or back to life, whatever. (rade 11 students took most ol their lessons in the old building, which meant the bathrooms were housed in another structure. They were dirtier and older but they were alsa visiled less Irequently, which was perfect far Kale's present needs. Besides, it was kind of suilable because right naw she felt like something that had been discarded alher its owner had lost interest. She had been crying so much she Wondered where all the water was coming from, how her smal body could produce that much. She was also starting to feel thirsty. Thirsty and tired. She noticed belatedly that her phone was vibrating. She rummaged through her shoulder bag and peeked at the screen, sobbing piteously. It was her beshie Lor (short for Lorraine) checking on her. It turned out Kate had been crying for two hours straight and it was finally time to go home Kate ignored all the missed calls and texts and put the phone back in her bag. Let them all think she had gone home early, she thought. She couldn't stop thinking of Josh Ventura. He was stuck in her mind like a Vine clip and she couldn't get him out. All the happy memories that they had shared now felt like the giant wheels of a speeding cargo truck, under which he had thrown her. And the thought of Josh and Bernadette together made her blood boil. Kate never used to care or think about Bernadette in any way. She was just another student on another track. People even dubbed her the Super Gue because of her tendency to stick to any boy. But now Kate was forced to compare herself to her with regards to appearance, intelligence and personality. She wished there was an off switch for love. But in the same way she hadn't noticed when she fell for Josh, there was no end in sight for the pain. It felt infinite. She wished she was some kind of robot that could be programmed to forget, so she'd be back to her normal cheerful self who didn't miss class and looked forward to every single day. She wanted to be her ma's daughter again or the straight-A student that everyone in school admired her to be. The thought of her old self and where she was hiding ATM brought another bucket of tears