The Alpha's Revenge

Chapter 65

Anna’s POV

I don’t know what made me go up to Nicholas in the office like that. Ruby and I are so confused about everything. I feel I am playing favorites towards Donovan. I allowed him to touch me and kiss me. The kiss on my neck gave me shivers I never felt before. I think that was the first time I was ever aroused. I know he is my possible third-chance mate, but is it fair that I am open to him doing these things to me, that I have never allowed Nicholas to? Nicholas and I have only hugged once besides today, and that was due to emotional support. If we are going to make such a permanent decision, we have to have all the information. So, I want time to talk and get to know Nicholas. If he wants to touch or kiss me, I am open to that. If the attraction is just not there, we need to discuss that.

We make a plan based off the information Gordon discovered. The plan is a good one but the next couple of days for me have just gotten harder and busier. I was hoping to relax before my fight this weekend, but there’s no rest for weary. That’s fine though, whatever I need to do to complete this task. We finished with our plans and set times to meet.

“Anna, I am available to talk now, if you are” Nicholas says

“Okay, let me change my clothes into something more comfortable” I say

I had been wearing a business-style pantsuit since we were doing the formal farewell. I am going to change into jeans and a shirt, some sneakers and a sweater. It’s not cold out yet, but a sweater is warranted. I meet Nicholas in the foyer and he too has changed. He has on jeans and a hoodie with sneakers. I smile upon seeing him.

“I have never seen you dressed so casual” I comment

“I can be laid back and casual too” he smiles

“I figured we could just take a walk”

“Sounds good”

We walked out the packhouse and I took him on a walk towards the stream in the back of the property. As we walk we talk about random things. My time here as an elite warrior, when he used to come here as a child, spending time with Xander and his family, our favorite past times, colors, foods and stuff like that. We get to the stream and have a seat.

“Is Dawn Trust your second chance?”

“I believe so”

“She seems like a nice girl. I want to hate her but I can’t”

“Did you meet your third chance?”

“Yes, he’s one of the reasons I wanted to talk to you today. He’s aware of the situation. I have spoken to him and he accepts and understands this complex situation. The thing is, I have allowed him to get closer than I have you and I didn’t think that was fair. I admit our meetings and encounters were different, but I felt if we were going to make this kind of decision it should be a fair one”

“What do you mean by ‘get closer’, Anna?”

“We have kissed”

“So, you kissed him, and you kick me in the head?” he says standing up

“He never called me a w***e. He never yelled at me. He admires who I am and what I can do. He was understanding and encouraging. He didn’t talk about changing me. So, yeah, we kissed”

“You know I said all of that in anger. I didn’t mean it”

“So, every time you get angry, which with me maybe often, I have to be prepared to be yelled at and degraded? I’m not okay with that, Nicholas”

“No. I apologize for my actions that day. It will never happen again”

We sit in quietness for a few minutes.

“Why does it feel like we are always fighting?”

“Because since we met, we almost have been”

“That’s not how a mate bond is supposed to be”

“Agreed, that is why I wanted us to spend time together. I want us to be sure when we decide”

He takes my hand and rubs his thumb across my wrists.

“I am attracted to you. Every time I see you, I want to wrap you in my arms and kiss you. I think about you all the time”

“But do you see us together? When you think of the person you want by your side, is it me?”

“It is you!” There is a long pause before he continues

“But you are not fighting. You are taking care of our children. You are helping organize the kingdom’s Christmas events my mother used to do. We share quiet nights and walks together” he says quietly

“Can I not do both? Can I not tend and take care of you and our children, then organize the kingdom's events and fight by your side when we are under attack? Can I not put the kids to bed then go on a walk or with you to interrogate a prisoner? I think I can. I am capable to do both”

“I don’t question your ability. I don’t want you doing both. Anna, I just want you to be my mate, Luna and Queen. Not a warrior”

I gently grab his face and turn him to look at me. I want him to truly see me!

“But I am a warrior, Nicholas. I can’t stop being who I am. I want to be with you, but I will not be something I am not or hide who I am to do that. I would never ask you to not be who you are”

“You are so beautiful!”

With that, he leans in and kisses me. A soft, simple kiss that advances to something more. The tingles of the bond are there, and his scent is amazing. But unlike the kiss with Donovan, I am not aroused and there are no moans elicited. We break the kiss, and he looks at me.

“That was nice” he says

“But?”

“Not as romantic and passionate as I would expect”

“What does this mean?”

“I think we are trying to make something more than what it is. We have a bond and the feelings from it are amazing, but I don’t think we are the people each other desire”

“I agree. And if the Goddess has given us this opportunity, then we are not disrespecting the bond. I don’t think I can ever be the person you want and that’s not fair to you. I would rather us not pursue something that is not sustainable”

“Agreed!”

He stands up and guides me to stand in front of him. With our hands clasped.

“I King Nicholas Baxter, reject you, Annalisa Corinne Royal as my mate, Luna and Queen”

“I Annalisa Corinne Royal accept your rejection King Nicholas Baxter, and reject you as my mate and Alpha”

We wait for the pain but it never comes. We hug and feel lighter than we have. We walked and talked back to the packhouse. Things flow better and feel better between us, now that there is no bond.

“Is it weird that I am more comfortable with you now that we severed the bond?” I ask

“I was thinking the same thing. I think we will be great friends, and I feel that is what we were supposed to be”

“I’m good with that. So, when are you going to see Dawn?”

“I want to get my house in order first. I can’t bring her there with everything going on”

“Are you going to be able to wait that long?” I tease

“I don’t know” he laughs

“You be nice to her. She’s a good girl. If you aren’t, I’ll show her some of my moves to take down a person bigger than you”

“You wouldn’t? We are friends now!”

“Yes, but us girls gotta stick together”

“Nicholas, can I make a suggestion?”

“Yeah, you never have to ask. I have a feeling you will be the most candid friend I have” he says with a smile

“You need to talk to your parents. You still have a lot of guilt and feelings that you need to process, and I think talking to your parents will help. It was something I was able to do, and it helped a lot”

“How do I do that?”

“Just talk to them. I was able to do it via the Moon Goddess while in my coma. But maybe go to the Royal Memorial site for them. Or make a memorial of your own and just talk from your hurt. It will make you feel better”

“I’ll think about it”

We walk into the packhouse and give each other a hug before going our separate ways. It was a hard decision but the right decision. I head to the dining room, then to the office Xander lets me use. Now to get work done.