Christmas' Misery

Chapter twenty six

[Carlos]

After dealing with Christmas upstairs, I headed here in the living room to have some piece of mind with the fire in the chimney in front of me. I always do this everyday when I am waiting for her before but now she's here, I'm still waiting for her. Waiting for her to remember everything including me. This is frustrating. I thought everything will be okay if I will find her but now she is back, it's just became worst dealing with her.

I raised my head in the painting that is hanged at the top of the chimney wall. It is her and me in our wedding day and we are both happy together. I can see the truly happiness in her smile and eyes that telling me how lucky I am to have her. But now? I seems like an annoying person to her that she will always hate. She is quite different now than she used to be before.

"What is this?!" Christmas suddenly showed up and threw the folder to me. "Why is my signature are there? Are you playing my head?" She asked in her forehead knotted.

I placed the folder in the table in front me and arched my brow to her. "I already told you but you don't want to believe me. So, why asking me now?" I asked sarcastically.

"I-if I am her, why can't I remember anything? There should be a memories in my head even a little if I was her!"

I chuckled. "Oh? So, you are now claiming that you are her? My wife?"

She suddenly stopped. "I wasn't claiming. You are the only one who putting me in this confusing situation!"

"The situation isn't confusing," I said, looking at her eyes, "You just can't remember everything."

"Because I wasn't her that's why I can't remember anything," she said grinding her teeth.

"Why don't you just sit with me here while we are waiting for the dinner." I signalled her the single couch beside me. "Please?" I said as she didn't move where she standing.

"Fine." Christmas marched and sat in the couch that I signalled her. She crossed her arms while looking at the fire in the chimney.

"Have you already watched a movie where a person has a doppelganger? A person who living with the same of her features?"

“Oh?” she only replied.

"I wish you are just her doppelganger so that I didn't brought you here to see everything in this house but you ain't, Christmas. You are not a doppelganger or a Xerox copy of her because it was you. Every faces in the portrait you are seeing here was you!" I said, looking at the fire seems everything flashes back there in the red flame.

"Maybe I am just a Xerox copy of her and if I am really her, I will remember that I am part of this or you at least."

I cleared my throat and took the old newspapers I hidden at my back. I threw it to her. "Maybe that's enough for you to believe me."

"What is this? This newspaper smell so old," she said disgusting.

"Read the headline of the newspaper, it was you in that car accident." I watched Christmas to do what I told her and she is reading what is in the headline, in her forehead knotted.

Ring! Ring!

When my phone ring inside my bag,ni quickly took it inside. A smile formed in my lips as I saw who is in my caller ID. It was Christmas and seems her class is already done.

"Hello wife," I started as I answered her call.

"Miss me, hmm? Say you do," she said in the other line.

"I am always." I chuckled.

"I miss you too Carlos."

"Please, come back now. I am missing you so badly," I begged to her but I am just kidding. I'm just testing her what would she say.

"I really want to go home now but I can't and you know why."

I laughed. "I'm just kidding. I'm just testing you what would you say. I got you!" I said but her answers squeezed my heart but I understand her.

"You are playing on me, huh!"

"No I'm not. I just really want to know what would it be."

"You satisfied now?" she asked in sarcasm.

"Very much," I replied, "So, where are you now?"

"Heading to the grocery store before I head to our boarding house," she answered.

"Okay, you take care there."

"Always you don't have to worry about me. You take care also there."

"I will for you my love," I replied.

"You still going to wait for me, right?" Her voice suddenly changed into lower.

"Of course I will wait. What kind of question is that? I am always waiting for you here," I answered in annoyance because I hate her question. It seems there's other meaning behind of it.

She laughed in the other line. "You should be because I'm going to come back for you."

"You must be."

"I call you later. I am now here at the grocery store. I love you, Carlos."

"I love you too," I replied and she ended our line.

After that our conversation, I thought it will just be the same how we are in the past days. In the next day, I'm expecting her to call me like she always do but she did not that made me wonder. In her lunch she didn't call me at the same when her class is already done. I tried to call her many times but I can't reach her. It continued in the next day and other next day till it became almost two weeks I didn't hear any from her.

I am here now at the veranda of her room that became our room. As we got married, I start staying here since she already had this big house. Soon as I use my course of Civil Engineering, I will build a new house where I can put her in a good and peace place that is only us together with our children. We decided both to live in a woods and we both agreed on it. For the mean time that we are still studying, we are going to live here.

I sipped the last drop of the ram in my hand and threw the bottle in the trashcan at my back. Christmas still not answering my call and she isn't calling me. I don't have any idea what is going on there and I don't want to think that she is seeing some other guy there because I trust her. She loves me.

I took my cellphone in my pocket and look our picture together that is my wallpaper. I smiled bitterly while looking at her face. “What just happened Christmas?”

“What just happened to you?” I asked her on my side as I paused telling the story how the changes started.

“I don't know what are you talking about,” she replied while still looking at the newspaper in her hands.

Knock! Knock!

“What?!” I asked here in the veranda.

“The dinner is already prepared,” answered of the maid from the outside.

“Okay, I'm coming in a minute!” I replied and look at my cellphone, hoping it will ring but it did not.

I closed the door of the veranda as I entered inside and threw my cellphone in the bed. Before I could walk through the door, my eyes locked on her drawer. There is something in me I want to take a look what is inside. To break down of my curiosity, I did what I should do. I opened the first drawer box and my forehead knotted when I saw folder. This is the first time that I look at her things and I'm hoping there is something I can use here. If this will continue till tomorrow, I will find her in Florida to see what she is really up to there.

I opened the folder here in the bed and I dropped a letter in the floor that made me more curious what is this all about. She never told me anything about this. I start reading the letter as I saw it was he who wrote.

Dear Carlos,

I know you will find this letter if I'm already in Florida and I know we already talk about this and I'm sorry that I didn't listen. I didn't tell you this so early because I don't want us to have an argument. You won't let me anyway. The papers here in the folder is the behalf of your rights on what I had right now. Everything I had is yours including the properties and the house as well. I already talked our attorney about this and you only have to do is to sign the papers. That's it and I hope you will sign this as you read my letter.

–Love, Christmas

“You really are stubborn,” I said and shook my head.

We already talk about this before our wedding that I don't want to have a share on her will. I want her to have it all because I want to work hard for my own money. I want to buy things for her that I really worked but she didn't listen to me. I heaved as sigh as I tightly hold the folder in my hand thinking if I should sign it or not? But at the end of my thoughts, I took the pen and signed the papers. I didn't signed it to have interest in her money but to use in having my passport so I can find her there. And if possible, I will continue studying there that I should have done before when she asked me. I'm so stupid!

“Oh? So, you aren't really living in Tampa, Florida? You are just there because of her?” she asked after listening on the story I am telling her.

“Yea, because of you.”

She glared at me. “I am not her. This is not me.” She placed the newspaper in the table. “I didn't even had a car in my life and I never got into an accident like that!”

“You had an amnesia, Christmas.”

She suddenly stopped. “That is bullshit!”

In the help of Luis, my only friend, I quickly got a ticket to Tampa, Florida where she is now. I gave him a 20% of the money I got so he can start over their auto shop as a payment on helping me. I thought in following her there will become easy but it did not. I tried to text her, call her that I'm here in Tampa but I receive nothing.

I searched the whole city and the people around me with her picture but they didn't seen her. I already goes to her university but they told me she did not come to school suddenly that made me worried. I kept searching for almost two months for her but no Christmas found but I didn't give up. Still hoping she gotta be somewhere safely. Not until one day in the mall, I found her at last.

“I'm sorry I didn't mean it to bump in you,” apologized of a woman that I couldn't see her face because of the long black hair.

“It's okay,” I replied.

The woman placed her hair at the back of her ear that made me stunned as I saw her face. “I have to go now. I have a class.” She said hurriedly and passed me.

“Christmas,” I whispered as I got back to my senses.

“Don't tell me you can't remember that day?” I asked, arching my eyebrow on her.

“I met lot of people on the way and all of them I can't remember there faces,” she answered and averted her eyes on the painting in front us, “So, how did you say that I got an amnesia, huh? Are you sure that I am the one you met in that mall? You must be thought someone else that is she because of stress in finding her. You are hallucinating.” she looked at me.

“Tsk. I wish I am but I ain't.”

I found out where she studying now and I'm 100% it was her because I already saw her face clearly. But the problem is she acted different like someone else. She didn't even say anything to me when we met in mall. She just left me there with a question mark on my head.

“Are you Carlos Xyloses? The new transferee student?” asked of the dean to me here in her office.

“Yes, Dean, I am.”

“Taking a Civil Engineering, huh? Your record in your last previous school was great. Why did you end up here?”

“Actually I am here for someone that's why I transferred here,” i answered honestly.

“Oh? You are here for someone? Girlfriend?” the dean asked seems she is interested.

“Is there someone who transferred here also before me? Or are you familiar with the name of Christmas?” I asked directly and placed an envelope of money at the top of her in case she won't tell.

“What is this, Mr. Xyloses?” she asked looking in the white envelope.

“In case you don't answer my question and I know it's already enough for you to answer me.”

She laughed. “Even you don't give me a money, I will answer your question but since you already offered I will take this.” She took the envelope. “So, what is it again?”

“Is there someone who transferred here before me or do you have a name of Christmas in your record?”

“Christmas? I think I remember that name, hmm,” she answered even I knew there is, “I remember she came here with her mom last week.”

“Her m-mom?” I asked in surprise.

“Yea, her mom, Layla, she brought Christmas here without nothing–I mean she got in a car accident and lost her memories. That is what Layla told me as she enrolled her here so we can adjust for her,” she replied that made stunned, “This is the newspaper where Christmas putted in the headline because she was hit by a truck,” she gave me the newspaper that she took inside the drawer box of her desk, “I'm glad that she survived that but the saddest part is she lost her memories.”

I came out in the office didn't know what to say on what the dean said to me. Before I could walk through my room, I suddenly stopped as I saw her walking on my way. I watched her and she just passed me on that squeezed my heart in pain. Is she really lost her memories? Including me?