Control

                It was a cloudy, cold October day. Only a week out from my 18th birthday and the house was buzzing with people in all different directions. My father, the current Alpha of our pack, was challenged by an Alpha to the east, hoping to gain our territory. Our home was in the foothills of the Smokey Mountains in Tennessee can spanned across 400 acres. My father stood 6 feet tall, his tan skin had begun to show his age. Wrinkles creased from the corner of his dark brown eyes and his thick, untamed brows had begun to salt and pepper just like his hair. He stood in his office looking over a map on his desk, surrounded by various members of his war council, including my older brother. Luke was just barely taller than my father and he and I shared the same thick, dark brown hair. The circles under his dark brown eyes and stubble on his cheek told me he hadn’t slept very well in the days leading up to this. He made eye contact with me through the open office door and smiled that half smile he always did. I felt frozen in time with everyone moving around me as I stood in the hall outside the office watching them. I couldn’t shift yet and it wasn’t killing me that I was so useless. My thoughts were interrupted when out of the office came Noah, Luke’s best friend. His gaze met mine and I stared into his blue eyes. Noah was also around 6 feet tall and had broad shoulders. His jet black hair was longer than usual but framed his square jawline well. Noah would take over as Beta for his father when my brother ascended to Alpha. He approached me and put a hand on my shoulder.                 “Take a breath, Jade. Everything you’re thinking is strewn across your face. That’s not good for morale.” He jested while sliding his arm over my shoulder and turning to face the office with me. I had known Noah my whole life, but this squeeze of my shoulder felt intense. Was he just as worried as I was?                 “Bring them back, Noah.” I said in a low whisper. I looked up at him with pleading eyes. His eyes locked on mine and he nodded. He held my gaze and looked like he wanted to say something but the council began coming out of the office and broke our eye contact.                 “I’ll bring them back and when I return, we need to have a talk.” Talk about what? I opened my mouth to respond but my father and brother approached.                 “Jade.” Was all my father needed to say before my arms wrapped around his waist and I laid my head on his chest, holding back tears. They had gone to battle before but something felt different this time.                 “Come on, Jade. Don’t look so worried! This will be a piece of cake; we’ll be back by your birthday! Can’t miss my little sister’s first shift!” Luke tousled my hair. The look in his eyes didn’t match was he was saying. What did they know? What were they not telling me? Luke had a way of putting people at ease but I didn’t believe him this time. I just nodded, released my father, and wrapped myself around Luke trying to make myself believe him.                 “Alright boys”, my mother interrupted. Her light brown hair was thrown into a bun on top of her head. The green eyes that I inherited were topped with long, dark lashes. She was lighter in skin color than my father, but she had also began to get wrinkles in the corners of her eyes and the front of her hairline had more grey strands than not. ‘Tinsel’ is what she called it. My mother was the same height as myself, only reaching the top of my father’s shoulder. She was wearing jeans and a nice top but had topped that with an apron that was now covered in flour. As the Luna of the pack, she had spent the whole morning preparing rations with the kitchen staff. I wonder if she had slept at all. She didn’t look worried, maybe she didn’t know whatever my father did. Or maybe she hid it well. She has always been very composed in that way.  “No standing around now. The warriors are ready to go and rations are packed. Jade, you must come with me to say goodbye to the squads.”                                 I let go of my brother and nodded. Even if she wasn’t my mother, she was not someone that you said no to. She held eye contact with my father, looking for any hint of what was going to happen, of how at-risk her only son and husband were. He merely winked and wrapped her in a big hug. His laughter booming down the hallway as he whispered something for just her. The giggle that escaped this normally collected woman made me smile. That was the pull of a mate, the truest form of love with two people entangled forever. My father could always make my mother laugh and seeing them together had me thinking of my own future mate. I wouldn’t feel the pull to them until after I turned 18, but I hoped he and I could have the same relationship as my parents.                 My parents and Luke began to move towards the exit of the house and I was pulled out of thought by a large hand meeting my shoulder. I looked up and Noah was standing there with me. He looked at me, again like he had something to say, but instead he ran a hand through his hair and sighed. Almost like he was fighting it, I heard him make a low growl and he pulled me into a hug. His head rested on mine “I’ll come back to you”, he said as he kissed the topped of my head. Warmth filled my face and before I could answer he had let go and was walking towards my family.                 “W-wait…” I began to say, he turned and looked at me and flashed a huge grin. His teeth were straight and looked even whiter against his tan skin and dark lips.                 “When I come back!” He turned and simply waved. I ambled down the hallway behind him, following my family. I watched the floor as I walked, a smile spreading across my still blushing face and felt the world again rush around me. Was this just the jitters of battle? Noah had never showed interest in me before.                 When the warriors left, I studied the back of my father, Luke, and Noah. I was willing them to come back, willing Noah to keep his promise. The next week felt like months. The days drug on and my mother tried her best to keep me busy. She had me working in the nursery, the garden, and on my studies. She had nearly every moment of every day mapped out, but I believe it was more for her than for me. My father had left just enough of our warriors behind to guard his Luna and the rest that were unable to fight. Meals were smaller and quieter, with everyone waiting on a nightly mind-link from my father for updates.                 One morning, I woke and began to go into my schedule like I did every day, but when I came into the kitchen I was met by my mother and the kitchen staff. They had hung a “HAPPY BIRTHDAY” banner and made me a special breakfast of French toast and eggs. It was my birthday. Had I forgotten? My mother came and kissed me on my forehead. “Happy birthday, darling. I’m sorry that your brother and father aren’t home yet. I thought we could do a small celebration, just us girls.” I smiled and began to answer but high-pitched ringing started in my ears. I dropped the plate she had handed me and tried to use my hands to block my ears. Behind my eyelids I saw flashes of woods and I was surrounded by the stench of blood. I looked down and saw that the blood was coming from my body, but the body didn’t belong to me. I saw familiar large hand come up to touch the blood on the chest. “Jade” he whispered before collapsing over. I opened my eyes, and I was back in the kitchen, with my mother knelt down beside me. I looked down and there was no blood on my chest, but I felt like I couldn’t breathe, like my heart and lungs were being squeezed. My eyes must’ve showed my pain because my mother furrowed her brows and demanded someone take me to doctor.                 The pain was so intense, I was hyperventilating as someone was running with me to the doctor. I had never felt such pain in my life, it must’ve caused me to pass out because when I awoke I was in an unfamiliar bed on the second floor of our pack hospital. The bed was positioned in a way that I could see the sun setting on the horizon. I heard muffled voices coming from the hallway, one of which I knew was my mother. “What the hell happened to her?” “I’m running some tests, but it sounds as if her mate bond was severed.” “Her mate bond? She just turned 18 today. How could it already be severed?”                 “Mom”, I saw figures coming down the driveway. Were they back? Did she know something? She rushed in the room and I pointed out the window. Her soft motherly gaze turned to one with intensity as she turned to go downstairs. I slowly got up and trailed behind her, almost knocking her over as she had stopped at the base of the steps. In the doorway stood my father, badly bruised and bloody with scratches all over him. He looked at my mother and shook his head, looking down at the ground as his body began to shake. My mother pushed passed him and just outside the door were the bodies of the ones we’d lost. I heard her scream and felt my vision shatter. I tried to push passed too but my father grabbed me by the waist, “No, Jade”. I pushed myself away from him and worked my way outside and saw next to the crumpled body of my mother, was the pale, cold body of Luke.                 “No”, I muttered as I slowly approached my mother. This couldn’t be happening. She screamed again and again splinters ran across my vision. I finally reached the bodies and felt my stomach drop. Next to the motionless, wide eyed body of my brother was Noah. His body looked fake, almost like it was carved from rock. I expected him to move, to smile at me again, to tell me what he had to say. The terrified screams and wailing of my mother shattered the world around me again, this time the ground crumbled to pieces and I began falling into nothingness. I screamed, reaching out for something, anything, until finally I landed on my back.