After My Death Tomorrow

Episode 8

With my heart pounding against my ribs, I make sure na maaabutan ko si Spero Futurae. Kung ano ang bilis ng aking mga yabag ay ganoon din ang pagtibok ng puso ko.

Hindi ako pwedeng magkamali.

Siya iyong naka-black hoodie!

Nagpalinga-linga ako noong makalabas na ako sa 7 Eleven. Nasaan na siya?!

Habol hininga, I tried harder to search for him . . . or her? And there, I saw him. Walking to the pedestrian lane along side the crowded people.

I didn't waste any chance. I ran as fast as I can towards that stranger. Noong maabot na niya iyong dulo ng kalsada ay mas binilisan ko pa ang aking pagtakbo.

Hindi siya pwedeng mawala ngayon. Kailangang makilala ko na siya. Para madalian na ako. Para hindi na ako maguluhan. Para masagip ko na talaga si Marco laban sa nakakalungkot niyang tadhana.

Naglalakad siya patungo sa kalsada kung saan matatagpuan ang subdivision ng bahay namin. Mabagal. Sa sobrang bagal nga ay walang hirap ko siyang naabutan. Bago pa siya makalayo ay wala na akong hinintay pang sandali, hinigit ko siya mula sa kanyang braso.

But what I saw schocked the hell out of me.

It's . . . Diyes?!

"Oh, Margot?" He is staring at me as if I am a weird person.

I blinked. Hindi makapaniwalang tinuro siya. "Ikaw . . ."

He just stare at me with the same emotion on his eyes. Observing my face as if he's a scientist and I am a difficult specimen.

"Ikaw si Spero Futurae?" I almost squeal in disbelief.

He knitted his brows. "Uh? Spero-- what?"

I opened my mouth for a second. Then chose to close it for what I realized.

I wince unintentionally.

Okay, it can never be him. Diyes is too busy with his grades for this. It can never be him, jusko. Ano bang iniisip ko?!

Napakamot ako sa ulo. Natatawa, I began to lie. "Uh--" I tried hard not to look stupid at him. But I still ended up with the most stupid escapade of mine, "it's a prank!" Sabay talikod ko sa kanya. Pinapamulahan ng mukha dahil sa kahihiyan.

Ang tanga-tanga mo talaga, Margot!

Sa milyong dahilan na pwede mong piliin, bakit iyon pa?!

I am about to walk away when I was halted by his touch. Ipinatong niya ang kamay sa aking balikat. Dahil doon ay natigilan ako.

"Hey, are you okay?" Concern is evidently obvious on his tone.

Tumango ako. I tried hard to find for words-- convincing words that I could muster but I just ended up with, "Yes."

Then I chose to start walking away from him. On the back of my head, I can clearly see him look at me awfully. Well, I can't blame him. I would do the same if ever I am on his shoes. Mukha nga naman talaga akong tanga kanina.

Naiinis akong bumalik sa 7 Eleven. Naupo uli ako sa exact spot that I am sitted earlier. I tried to compose myself.

God, that was really close!

Kaunti na lang.

Shit.

Kaunting-kaunti na lang, makikilala ko na sana si Spero Futurae!

Bakit ba kasi bigla siyang nawala? May sa-engkanto ba siya?!

Iritado kong ginulo ang aking buhok. Napapikit sa inis nang ilang segundo. Noong magmulat muli ako ay naituon ko ang aking mata doon sa letter ng future self ko.

I have to read this now!

Binuksan ko ang envelope. Kinuha mula sa loob iyong papel. Then I took a very deep breath before I start to read it.

To Margot,

Today was the day I regretted so much that it never let me sleep at night. Sobra akong nakonsensya matapos ang araw na ito.

Wanna know why?

Because I know who posted the alleged scandal of Marco.

It's Vaeden.

Curious why I know it?

It's because I saw it with my two eyes. I saw him post it on one of the f*******: groups of our school while using a dummy account.

And for the second time, wala na naman akong ginawa.

I am stupid, I know it. And I am not proud of it.

After this day, Marco's life will change forever. He will be seen not just as his father's fault but also as a p*****t teenager who is a glutton for s*x.

Vaeden raised the rage of the people towards Marco. He assassinate his name. Merciless. Pinagkalat niyang si Marco iyong nasa scandal. He even said that Marco forced some girls to send nudes to him. Harap-harapan niyang siniraan si Marco. Harap-harapan niyang sinaktan ang matalik niyang kaibigan.

And it was because of me.

If I have stopped Vaeden from posting that private video of Marco, things would have been different.

But you know? I was afraid and confuse that time. Ayokong makialam. Ayokong madamay. Kasi natatakot ako. Kasi conscious ako sa sasabihin ng ibang tao. But I don't justify my wrong. It's so hard for me to cope with the situation that time.

Unlike you, I know that it is clear to you that you have to make a firm step to save Marco's life. And I know that you will.

Yes. I will never do the things that the coward you did. Iba ako sa 'yo.

Now, at exactly seven o'clock in the evening, I want you to sit on one of the benches in 7 Eleven. Don't ask why, just follow my instructions.

I blink. Tinignan ko ang aking relo, it was quarter to seven o'clock right now!

This must be the reason why Spero Futurae chose to give this letter here. Why he told me to come here.

This s**t is getting too critical . . .

Make sure na doon ka uupo sa pwesto kung saan madali kang makikita ng taong papasok.

On cue, lumipat agad ako ng upuan. I made sure na doon talaga ako sa makikita ng tao. Iyong tipong ako agad ang bubungad sa kanila.

Okay, so . . . what's next?

I look around. Nothing's weird in particular inside, that's why I focused my gaze to the trasparent glass of the convenience store. And there, I saw Vaeden. Walking towards the door.

Fudge!

Vaeden will come. Diyan ko siya nakita. He said hi to me then sat beside me. I noticed he is not with his usual mood. The real Vaeden that I know was seem to leave him. Walang natira sa kanya kundi lungkot and that moment, I was really clueless.

But, not after I heard his story.

It affected me. I felt his pain. I really do. That's why when he told me he's about to assassinate Marco's name by posting his private video on our f*******: Group, I didn't say anything.

Wala akong nasabi.

Hindi ko alam kung bakit wala akong nasabi.

Stupid.

Lahat ng desisyon natin, may dahilan. You are just too coward to admit that you are nothing but a stupid, selfish, cruel and . . . uptight teenager who only thinks about herself.

That, Margot, that was the event I want you to change tonight. You need to stop Vaeden because if you don't, things will continue to come to a tragic end.

I gasp.

But, how can I do this?

I am not even close with Vaeden!

Tunog ng nagbanggang piraso ng metal ang narinig ko. Hudyat na pumasok na si Vaeden sa loob. On cue, I cleared my throat and started to take courage to do what I am told. I ready myself. With all of my forced confidence.

I can do this.

I have to do this.

Noong magtama ang tingin namin ay ngumiti ako sa kanya. He smiled back but with the hidden hint of sadness. Tama ang nasa letter. Ibang iba ang Vaeden na nakikita ko ngayon. He looks fragile right now. The Vaeden that I know? He radiates happiness whenever you see him. The Vaeden that I am seeing right now seems . . . lifeless.

For a moment, he left my sight. He directed his way towards where the drinks can be seen. Noong muli ko siyang nakita ay dumiretso siya sa cashier. He is holding a coke, mukha pa rin siyang wala sa sarili.

As he is paying, I ready myself.

This time, I will make it right.

He will sit beside me and I will stop him from posting tha private video of Marco on social media.

Then . . . things will begin to fall into right places.

Tragic ends won't be possible anymore.

I will live a life with Marco-- a life with nothing but his contagious smile and laugh.

But what happened didn't go as expected.

Right after the cashier gave him the receipt, I was schocked when Vaeden went outside.

How could this happen?!

Nabago na ba talaga ang future?!

Shit.

This is all my fault . . .

With widened eyes, I drag my feet to follow him. With my heart knocking my whole system, I know, I really have to make things right tonight.