My Ex-Wife

Chapter 5

Dolisa's POV

There was a usual warm heavy weight on my chest and a warm little body tucked by my side on my arm practically on my body.

And ofcoure as always this fill warmth in my chest. I open my eyes before closing again due to the sun rays entering the room through the window.

After adjusting my sight I looked on my chest. My little world was sleeping peacefully on my chest. And then I turn my head on my side and see my little life sleeping peacefully on my arm.

I feel so peaceful so so warm inside that I couldn't help but to smile before squeezing them both to me. Then I tried to wake them up with my free hand by tickling or tapping their noses.

"Mi Corazón! Wake up it's morning" I shook them lightly.

They just babble before went back to their sleep

I chuckled before an idea popped in my mind

"Who ever is going to wake up first, will get mommy's kiss first"

One...

Two..

Thr..-

"I got up first" "No I got up first" and with that they start arguing

I shook my head before saying "let's mommy decide"

I playfully start tapping my finger on my chin pretending to be thinking "I think it's...."

I trailed off to tease them

"Its me muma right" Ray asked pointing a finger on himself

"No mommy I know its me this time" Liza whinned

"No you are lying it was m-.."

"Fine ok ok let's mommy decide and you know mommy never lied to you right?" I asked them

They both nod

"So I think it's....." I trailed off again "its Liza this time" 

Liza stand up jumping and clapping before she crashed into my arms. I placed kiss all over her face making her giggle.

But after some time we both noted that our little chipmunk is not anywhere near so we both looked for him simultaneously.

And there he was sitting at the edge of the bed with folded arms and little pout and face turned to side.

"Seriously Ray baby" I asked him amused

He turned his head toward us before rising his chin and nod his head seriously.

"Love what!! it's past two in the morning don't act like a child" she chided him

But he turn his face away with a pout

"What" she asked frustratingly

Still not looking at her he pointed towards the messed up knots.

"Seriously love" she placed her hands on her hips

He turned his head and looked at her with his chin raised and nodded seriously.

"Muma" "Mommy" they both were shaking me

I shook my head a little bit there was an intense pain not only in my head but also on my chest. I looked at my babies they both were looking at me with worried expression and was looking like they are about to cry. They both were holding my each hand.

I smiled before cupped both of their cheeks "Hey baby mommy's fine." I said them before adding "and you my little princess come here" I start tickling Ray to lighten up

He started to laugh before coming on my Lap I peppered his face with kisses and he giggled too.

I opened my arms wider so that Liza can also come to me and she come almost instantly like she was in the wait of this.

I hug them both tightly

"You are fine right mommy" they both turned and cupped my each cheeks with their hands and also placed kisses all over my face.

They were still looking worried so I hugged them again "Mi Corazón! Mommy is completely fine just you little people here hug mommy ok"

They noded their heads before squeezing me tightly making me laugh

"I am not interrupting anything am I?" Dad asked from the door

"No nanna come here give us hug too" Ray invited him

Dad entered the room before coming to us and hugged us all at a once before placing kisses on our forehead

"Te amo mis bebes" he said lovingly

And I saw him wiping the tear that escaped his eyes secretly before releasing us

"Te amo nanna" my babies stood up and kissed his cheeks

I some time think how do I get so lucky by having them in my life although they are not my real family but still they love me and my babies more than that.

Doctors told me that they can't predict that is my amnesia serious or not. They all said that it's look like I by myself don't want to remind about my past memories. At first ofcoure I deny it but when I thought about it I came to the conclusion that it's truth.

Because whenever I tried to think about it, before I could remember any thing I always feel so much pain in my heart like my life is being ripped out of me and is shredded into pieces

But the bigger reason than this is that I don't want to remember my past because I don't think so I can get this much love and care from anyone

So when the doctor advised me for therapies as I don't want to go for it but still I agreed because I thought that I don't want to be a burden on them. But when I was about to went they had tears in their eyes so I asked them truthfully and they told me that they don't want me to go away from them ever . So ofcoure I broke down too and tell them all about my same feelings and I saw how happy they were with my this decision.

"Why don't you people do your morning routine before went down your nanny is making pancakes for you" dad informed them

Listening the word pancakes and they both shouted 'yay' before running to their room

Dad smiled "They still didn't slept in their room"

I chuckled and hugged him "You know dad they can't"

We remain silent for sometime with him stroking my hair softly.

"You know I love you no we love you all so much" he asked

I get back a little before looking at his face his eyes were filled with tears

I cupped his face before asking worryingly " I know dad. And we love you too so much." And tears started to flowed down his cheeks I wiped it with my thumbs "Please tell me dad what happened? You are scaring me"

He smiled and shook his head "Nothing it's just you know we'll never do anything bad for you. You know that right?" He asked and I nod

"Promise me that you'll always remember us and will never forget us no matter how far we will be from you" he cupped my hand in his both hands

I looked at him confused and then panicked

"Dad I promise" I placed my free hand on the top of his "But please tell me that everything is fine"

"Yeah yeah everything is fine it's just your old man is getting emotional lately" and he laughed softly

I felt relief but still couldn't wrapped my head around this.

He stood up and said before leaving "And Come down after breakfast Mr Brown is coming. I told you about the deal no? Today is the last meeting about it." He turned toward me and smiled sadly "Hopefully it went according to our hopes" with that he left

Ryan's POV

I walked briskly from the hotel lobby toward my car while taking to Carlos

"- is so cute and little and do you know she just cried all the time when she is away from me. She is such a daddy's girl" he chuckled and talked lovingly about his new born Natasha

And all I feel was ache all over my being. If it's not by me maybe we will be having kids by now it's been six years so we would have at least 4 children until now and more with the passage of time.

Yes I wanted a lot of children with her and I always teases her about this. Before her I know that I have to get married and have children so I always thought that I would just have a kid or two but after marrying Bubble I want children, alot of.

The thought of her being pregnant with my child round and bare footed filled my heart with warmth at same time with pain.

"You know she looks like me more than her mother" he stated proudly "And Zara is very jealous of this" he laughed again

I sit in my car and told my driver to went to the mansion.

If not for my ego, my stubbornness she would have been with me. I too will cherish and love my child. I'll changed their clothes, their diapers. I'll feed them. And will send them to school, all the while with bubble in my arms, in my house, in my life...

All just if........

I just want to cut the call. Its not that I am jealous from his happiness. Ofcoure I am very happy that he is becoming stable in his life. Its just that I am feeling so much pain that I feel like I am dying. Like my heart has been squeezed harshly and mercilessly, suffocating my life.

I know people who know about this show me their sympathy but they don't feel, don't understand what I feel. They must be thinking that I am just overreacting but they don't know from what I am passing through.

Why wouldn't I feel such things, my life was perfect. Yes I was living perfectly happy with a beautiful and pure wife that she'll walk me to the door when I'll be leaving for the office, wait for me to come home before having dinner together. Take care of me, stand up with me with through thick and thin. Will ask me about my day. Tell me about hers. Never complained for any thing at all.

So why wouldn't I feel this way...

I talked to Carlos for some more time when I was about reach the mansion I congratulated him again before disconnecting.

I want to die....

Here I said it. Yes this is what I am hiding from the people. Even I was hiding this from me too at first. I don't want to accept that I am losing my will power that I can ever find my bubble. More to add on this that will she ever accept me again?

This all is haunting me. But now I have somehow accepted my defeat. I am tired. I am tired of waiting to see her, to hold her, to listen to her, most importantly beg her....

Please God please!! Give her back to me. I can't live without he-....

"Sir are you all right we have arrived" Sandros asked me.

I looked outside and of course we have reached and Toby was standing outside with my door opened. I quickly wiped a tears that has somehow escaped from my eyes before existing the car.

As I was walking to their main door all that was running in my mind was to turn back and just do what I have decided that I will be doing after this.

Even maybe I should have but what I saw stopped me to do such thing. At their door there was not only their butler but Alejandro and Caroline themself were standing beside him.

As I reached them I saw there is something different in their eyes today, in between happiness and sadness I couldn't predict.

"Welcome Mr Ryan Brown and thank you" he started warmly "Thank you so much for accepting my request. It means a lot to us" he glanced back at her wife

I frowned at their behavior but most importantly at his voice that was betraying his behavior. His voice was sad, too sad with his eyes but by his behavior he was trying to show happiness.

"Ahm...- it's fine" I told him monotone

"You are truly a loyal gentleman Mr Brown. You truly are"

He looked at me with so much emotions that I start feeling suspicious at him

His wife placed a hand at his shoulder "Alejandro dear let's invite him inside" he nodded and passed me a sad smile

What is wrong with this family??

They escort me to the same room where we were previously. As we entered there were more people inside the room. A man which I know was Nicholas, his son. And a woman and a child at least of 2 years old.

What the........

This looking some sort of family gathering more than meeting.

Is the women his daughter??

But when I saw how Nicholas was holding her by her waist I decided otherwise.

"Mr Brown nice to see you again" He greet me quietly with a..... sad smile too

"This is my wife Samantha and my boy Nicholai" he continued and I just give them a nod

"Mr Brown you are a very handsome man. No doubt why the children are very beautiful too" Samantha only greeted me enthusiastically 

I furrowed my brow what did she mean?

"Sam!!" Nicholas playfully warned her with a smile.

She just laugh and motioned me to sit

When I sit with everyone Alejandro started "I know you must be thinking its more like a family gathering than a meeting and it's true it is a family gathering" I was about to give him a piece of mind but he just shut me up with a raise of his hand "you'll understand everything with time but before that I want to tell you that we accepted your offer"

"We don't even want any money from you in return." Nicholas continued

"Its a gift from us" and Caroline ended

I was too stunned to speak or protest I was just looking at them incredulously.

Alejandro chuckles sadly "I know you must be thinking we are mad"

Err.... Yes!!

"But I must say reign up your horses because it's you who is going to be mad" before he turn toward his son and asked "Are they arriving?" and his son nodded

I still didn't change my look so he just sigh before calling the old butler

"Call Rose" just the two words and my heart started to beat rapidly

What is happening to me he had just called for his daughter......

There was so thick tension and quietness. And by the look on their faces they were all looking happy, sad and nervous. And they were also giving me encouraging smiles. Which I clearly don't know why!!!!

Then a voice came which just turn my everything upside down "Wow everyone's here. Is this a meeting or a gathering" and then she chuckled familiar causing to stoped my heartbeat

I looked at them asking a lot of questions with my wide eyes and they confirmed it with a nod and a wave of immense happiness flowed through me. Bring life back to my dead heart and soul. My heart started to pound so loudly in my ears and blood was rushing all over my body in a happy speed that look like I had it just trapped in my body making me feel nauseas. My body began to trembled when I feel her coming near me

"Rose Mi Corazón! This man here is Mr Brown, Ryan Brown" he gestured towards me

He signalled me with his eyes but I couldn't understand anything. I can't understand anything. My world was spinning around I couldn't grasp at what they are saying to me. I was just sitting there with a loud heartbeat, wide eyes and back toward her.

Then I feel a warm hand placed at my shoulder this snap me out a little and I looked up and saw Caroline looking down at me with adoration and pity and nodded her head to my side, at her. She encourages me to stand.

And I stand up almost instantly that my knees knocked up at the glass table resulting in crash of things which were placed on it in front of me and my phone which I had placed on my lap lately fell down at my feet but I care less at that time ad I turn toward her like a robot.

I feel a punch at my gut and wind was knocked out of my lungs. There she was standing looking beautiful and deadly in tight fitted jeans and and shirt with a jeans jacket on. Her Brown hairs were flowing down to her shoulders making her look like a model. A queen, my queen

Her figure it wasn't like before it had changed completely from chubby to hour glass but it didn't stunned me that much because she had told me before that she had maintained her chubby figure by herself due to some reasons.

"Bubble" I called in a small quivering whisper. She was looking at Jonah's family with confusion but looked at me instantly confirming that she had listened to my small voice

Her confused expressions somewhat changed to dead and cold but still confused stopping my heart.

There was no voice, no disturbance at all I couldn't even listened to my own heartbeat. She was looking straight into my eyes and I was looking straight into her eyes.

The familiar scent...

The familiar warmth....

The familiar light....

The familiar feelings...

I wanted to speak but my mouth and throat was dry like Sahara desert. No voice was coming out of it. My throat was parched. I was opening and closing my mouth like fish out of the water. As I always thought, I wanted to run toward her, crushed her into me, hold her tightly and never let go but I wasn't able to do that now. All I could do was stare at her

She was about to speak when we heard tiny squealing voices outside the hall. The door opened and enter two children running and pulling each other I couldn't see them as they were running and bubble was at front.

But when they said a specific word, the whole world stoped around me and my breath hitched

"Mommy" "muma" and they both hugged her legs tightly snapping her out

So she had married someone else and had kids with him. Ofcoure she had why wouldn't she? after all I betrayed her, I hurt her in the worst possible way. I betrayed and broke our love. Hell I even divorced her just like that. So she can marry after all she isn't my wife now.

The thought of her with some other man and have children was like acid pouring all over my body specially on my heart. All the time I want her to be the mother of my children.

I deserve it....

Fuck!! It hurts. It hurts too much. A sharp pain raises in my chest and I placed my hand on it and rubbed.

I started to chuckle painfully raising my head towards the ceiling and closing my eyes tightly.

I guess it's the time....

I looked at her again maybe last time...

She was sitting down and looking at me with wide eyes and the children were looking at me with their faces hidden under her neck.

I was about to walk out of there because the pain was too much to stay I was feeling like dying but stopped abruptly when the girl look at me again and start jumping

"Mommy look, look mommy"

When I look at her face, the happiness, the contentment that I feel inside me was beyond the world. The pain, the questions that were swirling inside me stopped and got their answers just by this

Then the boy who was still hiding under her mother's neck also come forward and I almost gasped.

"Look mommy he is big Ray"

Before she could say this I fell upon my knees and the feelings and heaviness that I was holding inside me flowed out of me as tears and I broke down with happy chuckles....