Before the I Do

*Sisiwe's POV* Here I was in front of the church full of family and friends. I always thought this was going to be the best day of my life but here I was feeling nothing for the man in front of me. “Is there anyone who thinks this couple should not tie the knot today? They should speak now or forever hold their breath” Pastor Moreno states My eyes search around for anyone who would dare ruin this day for me. I went to hell and back for this man to have a scumbag ruin my day. “Seeing there's no one, we shall continue. The couple chose to write their own vows so they could speak their heart.” There were adoring sounds from the attendees. And I looked at him from the corner of my eye and he was looking straight at us and I looked down. I then looked at my baby (Mpendulo) who was all smiles sitting near his granny who openly smiled at me and nodded. I felt a sharp pain in my heart. I turned back to look at my soon to be husband. “Mr Zondo ,you go first” Pastor says Mr Zondo was Sanele Zondo whom I've been dating for 8 years and who has had my heart for the entire time. He has done the unthinkable most times during our relationship but I loved him so I forgave him. He has cheated, lied, made another b*tch pregnant and then accused me of killing my kids which I miscarried. To say he has broken my heart with the accusations would be an understatement simply because he accused me while his baby mama was pregnant. Never did he think that maybe because of his reckless actions, I was under a lot stress and that how I lost the babies but naa I killed his babies, my babies. He took my hands and caress them “My love. I’m gonna start off by saying Thank you my love. Thank you for forgiving and staying with me through the most and Thank you for agreeing to be my wife” Sanele said The whole church adored “From the first I laid my eyes on you, you captured my attention. You were young but I didn’t care because I knew then I loved you. You were always in my space and somehow I felt like you knew how I felt about you but when I first talked with you I learnt you weren’t the woman to cross over”. 'But you crossed me over many times nxx' “We started dating and I was happier than I ever was. I tried my best to make you happy and I sometimes would feel like it wasn’t enough. You pushed me to being the best I could be and that made me the man I am today.” I felt a tear leaving my eye and I tried to hold the rest from streaming down “We have been through the most and these people here don’t know even half of what we've been through. I've hurt you countless times and every time you cried, it made me question if I deserved you and the answer was always no, but every time you’d look me in the eyes and say you aren’t going anywhere, that we in this together and you got my back” Tears left his eyes down to his cheek. My eyes failed me too and tears streamed down uncontrollably. Sanele wiped his tears using his elbow. “ I’m sorry for making you cry on your wedding day [he said while wiping my tears] I love you and I can’t wait to start this marriage life with you and I know we know nothing about marriage but we got each other. I love you Miss Khomo”. I wiped my face as it was now a mess. People applaud and were on their feet and I was overwhelmed. Yes Sanele has hurt me multiple times but we shared many good times and I couldn’t let all that go to waste. I looked at him as he also applaud and smiled at me. At that moment I was not certain about this anymore. He nodded in agreement and I look at my soon to be husband and tears left my eyes. “Miss Khomo, it’s your turn now to say what’s on your heart.” The Pastor says looking at me I start, “Sanele thank you for wanting me to be your wife and for showing me what’s worth it and what’s not.[ I let out a sigh and looked at his direction, he just stared at me]. I’m sorry. I can’t do this !!” The whole church gasped in shock and confusion. I reached for Sanele's hand and I kissed his cheek then I made my direction to Syamthanda. Syamthanda is a very close friend of Sanele and one would say he’s his right hand man and best friend. Everyone looked confused but I wasn’t gonna explain anything. Syamthanda stood up when I reached his seat “Syamthanda[I took his hand] I’m sorry I made a terrible mistake, I chose wrong. I know it’s all sudden but this is me, all of me giving myself to you. [Tears streamed down my face and Sya quickly wiped them off] If you still haven't changed your mind about us, please meet me at The Botanic Gardens and if you don’t I’ll know you made your choice” I said aloud At that moment, Sanele was still stunned and haven’t moved while tears flooded in his face. I faced the rest of the church and I could feel some people giving me the stares and some mumbling some things about what just happened. I stared at Mpendulo and he just looked down and cried holding on to granny. He may be just 8 years old but I knew he understood exactly what just happened. His granny(my mother in law gave me a death stare) After a while... I faced the church full of family and friends who came to witness my special day. “ I’m sorry for the inconvenience caused. There won’t be a wedding but you can make your way to the reception and you’ll be served there. My apologies again.” With that said, I stormed out. I heard someone call my name but I ignored them.