To Love Hate

“In three words I can sum up everything I know about life, it goes on.” -Robert Frost “You're being dramatic Oliver, I went straight there and back, I got caught up today with a client so I couldn't deliver her medicine any sooner. I didn't have much of a choice, what did you expect me to do? Leave her in pain?” I responded to my husband who was staring at me with a mix of anger and fear. Deep down I know I shouldn't have left, he has every right to be dramatic, leaving when its dark clearly breaches the rules we established ourselves to remain safe. Oliver's emerald green eyes held their intensity as he let our a frustrated sigh and ran his hands through is dark hair before resting them on the counter top, making his muscles prominent, and shifting his gaze. He could never stay mad at me for long, I was his ultimate weakness. “Mae come on, you know the rules. You can't just leave without warning when its dark outside who knows what could've happened.” His voice is strained as he pleads with me to understand his concern, causing guilt to crash over me like a tidal wave. I place a soothing hand on his arm pulling him from his trance momentarily, the pain in his eyes clearer than before. He sighs deeply again and stands up to hold me in a tight embrace as if he didn't hold me close I would disappear from his grasp. We stayed that way for what felt like forever, him clutching onto me like a life-line, head buried deep into my neck before I felt hands travel up to cup my face. Those intense green eyes meet mine again his face still etched with concern. “When I came home today and you weren't here Mae, I just- I've never been so scared, I can't loose you to them. I thought-” He stops himself before continuing but I know what he thought. He thought I had been taken by one of the monsters. My heart constricts in pain at the sheer idea, he thought I was going to end up like her. Avery. My best friend of 17 years, my rock, was taken in the early days of the new world. One of the wolves claiming her as his 'mate', a concept that became introduced to humans early on in order to allow us to become accustomed to their scared ways. Being the mate of a monster for a human is uncommon, they usually stick to their own species, but on the off chance your unlucky enough to be paired to one of those bastards, your choice is extremely limited. As apart of taking our rights, refusing the claim of a mate doesn't matter, the second their goddess paired you to a beast your stuck for life, regardless of your marital status as a human. They simply own you. A human mate's ranking is upgraded to that of their wolf counterpart which, in any case, is a major improvement to the poverty stricken lives of most humans, although the immense luxury comes at the cost of freedom. Its all one f****d up paradox. Avery was the strongest person I knew, and it was the moment I saw her being dragged screaming by a man claiming to be her love, I realised the threat was too great to overcome. Tears begin to cloud my vision at the painful memory and I shut off all thoughts on the matter instantly by bringing my mouth to his. He embraces my advances once more and we seek comfort in one another through our kiss. His mouth fits mine perfectly, like we were made for each other, and it takes all the strength I can muster to pull back into reality. “I'm sorry, I'm here now and I promise that next time I will take you or one of the boys with me if I decide to take a night-time adventure,” I apologise with a slight smile in an attempt to bring light to the dire situation. Instead of responding, he just pulls me closer again in an attempt to kiss me when we are interrupted by a loud bang followed by a string of curse words. Oliver just chuckles, the dimples forming on his defined tan face, his kind expression making him even more handsome if thats humanly possible. He takes ahold of my hand and pulls me into the main room where Noah and Carter, his two younger brothers, sit looking confusedly at the dropped box of supplies they must have knocked over. Our house isn't large by any means, made up of two small bedrooms, one shared by Oliver and I whilst the other is shared by his brothers, a small kitchen, bathroom and living space that we have decorated as best we can. It is cramped and rundown but we maintain it well enough, it's home. Noah and Carter are only slightly younger than Oliver, but they both are as well built as him which is extremely handy. Their strength means that they last longer while working intense shifts mining coal, it allows them to endure the physical hardships as well as ward off other humans from trying to harm us. Their strength means protection. Something not a lot of humans have around these parts but I am truly grateful for it. My knowledge of herbal remedies and medicine from before allow me to turn my trade into profit though payment or barter. I use my skill to assist humans in need of medical attention as best I can, supplies are not easy to come across, but through my own garden and smart deals, I make do. Surviving is a collaborative effort in this household and our ability to work with one another makes us better off than most. I turn my attention back to the scene unfolding before me Noah and Carter both trying to pick up rolls of bandages and patches that have been scattered, amongst other things, across the floor. Noah glances up at me through his shaggy blond hair with a mischievous glint in his eyes as they shift between Oliver and I suggestively, pointing out that he knew of our rondevou in the kitchen. Colour flows to my cheeks as I blush, casting my eyes downward with an annoyed yet humorous smile. Oliver doesn't notice our brief interaction as he focuses in on Carter with disbelief written on his face. “Really guys? I swear you are both the biggest dumb asses on the planet. One minute. I leave you alone for one minute and you manage to make a mess of all Mae's things.” He scoffs, looking at his little brothers with judgement, silently continuing his scolding. They both just smile wider and begin to laugh, Carter finishing putting the fallen items into the box. He looks more like Oliver than Noah, both of them taking after his father, they share the same green eyes although Carter has a light-brown hair colour instead. I place my hands on my hips as I raise an eyebrow, still maintaining my grin. “Pray tell, how did my supplies all end up on the living room floor then?” I interrogate, failing to seem authoritative at all with my cheeky expression. Carter stops laughing momentarily to point at his brother before continuing. “Well, funny story actually, we both finished our shift early and then sat down in here to just chillax you know? And, this is where it gets good, Noah here went to find some food to eat and stumbled in upon your little session and in a fit of laughter to explain it to me he accidentally ran into the bench and knocked off the box of supplies.” Carter lets out a breath as he leans back and bursts into laughter again when he sees the murderous expression on Olivers face. “What did I tell you about privacy you little punk?” Oliver questions before pouncing on Noah and erupting a play fight between three grown men. I just laugh and observe as they position each other into headlocks and wrestle positions all while throwing aimless insults at each other. This life isn't perfect, hell its hardly great. But we make do with what we have and I would rather live eternity in poverty with the people I love than be without them. Most people would kill for a chance to escape this life, some have. But I have seen the only escape and living with a slither of freedom, a slither of hope, is better than ending up like Avery. Anything is better than ending up like Avery.