Wild Baleigh Love

My ultimate sin

Ballice's pov

I don't know what to do anymore, I feel like I've tried in each and every way I know right to atleast have just a little attention from her but this is not it. She's still just as hard as a nutshell to crack.

What have I not done? No, the main question is, what did I ever do for her to hate me this much? I've done nothing, infact I tried explaining myself or rather apologizing to her when we were doing our project but before I could start talking about anything other than what we should do about our project, she could raise a finger to stop me. And so that's what I did. It was strictly project work, nothing more, nothing less.

I wanted so bad to tell her that I'm sorry for acting the way I did. Heck, I Know I messed it up, she was ready to go with friendship and here I was too greedy to want more, like I wasn't satsfied with that. Ballice what was wrong with you anyway?

Wait am I really the one who is wrong here? The girl played with my emotions first. How is one supposed to react when someone he likes, not even like, I'm damn sure I love that girl, okay blurts from nowhere that she likes him and you find out that she was just playing a mind game? How is one really supposed to react? Just how?

She drives me nuts, she has never even replied to my messages. I wish I didn't tell her that I'm that unknown person who used to text her. Ever since she left my place, there is no text of mine she has ever replied back. Being the Ballice I am, I never stopped texting her, every morning I do send her a 'Morning princess, have a nice day ahead' and every night a 'Goodnight princess, peaceful night'. So that's the Ballice I am, Ballice who never gives up.

Damn! the girl even sped up the project we were working on. Believe it or not we did the project in three days, we did some few consultations with the teacher and we've already submitted it. Well, we submitted it yesterday though. Can't be surprised we were the first ones to submit even though we relaxed for the first two weeks from the day we were assigned. We actually started working on it on Tuesday this week, on Thursday we submitted it.

There is something about this girl that I found really amusing while we were working on this project. The way she furrows her brows looking keenly on the map, the way she bites her lower lip harder when she finds it hard to get the answer, how she traces the map lightly using a pencil, how she holds the pencil feebly between her tiny fingers, you might think it's going to fall down but it can't and actually how she tucks the pencil in her hair next to the ear or behind the ear. She's something else really.

She did most of the work, how the heck were we supposed to do population investigation in Columbia? How other than finding help from google? I had already done the google search and I was ready to give her the answers but what she simply said is, that's not how to go about it. That's for the lazy people who are afraid to think hard. And google isn't exact, so we had to do the f*****g mathematics using the freaking map of Columbia.

Shit, since I was grouped with the lazy ones, the only thing I did was just press the numbers she could give me into the calculator and give her the answers. She did the regions research up to the local research alone on Wednesday. I was just surprised when she told me that on Thursday. We compiled our drafts and turned them into one document. We submitted and miss Lennah couldn't praise us any much for our work, infact kellane's work, I wish she knew.

It's been killing me now, I wanted so bad to blurt that I love her so loud since she couldn't give me the chance to talk anything else other than project work, but I didn't. I knew I will scare her away from me. Atleast she greets back in physical when I do greet her sometimes.

When she has found a decent job after college is when she'll think about having a boyfriend in her life. Is that what she told me? f*****g great, that's what she said. I know everybody has his or her own dreams, but is she sure about that? Look at me now, desperate for some girl's attention whom I'm certain doesn't even remember that I exist unless I poke her in some way.

I changed, I also never knew that I'll ever fall in love. I despise girls so so so much, until I met her. I said she'll be my ultimate sin and I'll be damned for her,well, I don't care that is it . She's worthy waiting, suffering and fighting for. I've no idea what I'll do if she'll one day accept me as her boyfriend, which is in dreams anyway.

There is no way that will be in dreams, if it really will be in dreams then I'd rather not wake up from it. I just want closure with her, I want to see her smile and laugh with me or for me, I can even pay to watch that. I want to see her every second of my life if that's possible. But because she's Tleigh kellane, it will not be easy. I know that for sure.

She never even had the slightest idea that she's the girl I named capital T. Of course I had to call her that way because I didn't want to be so obvious. Even when I tried explaining she still had no clue. How can I forget those words that made my heart flutter. She even went ahead and told me how she could have reacted. Damn!

Well if it were me, I don't know what I would have done. Seriously the Message from the song was so direct. It explained why you were a jerk to her at the first time, how you're sorry and how you feel about her. You also said that you want to make it up to her. The words were emotional but sweet at the same time. so were it for me, I'll try giving you a chance right after that song. If the feeling is not mutual I'll go with what I have at the moment and the feelings will grow with time. If I will not be able to feel the same way as you in between the rope I'll just cut myself because you can't just force yourself to love someone. But I'll first atleast give it a try.

Does she really know what those words meant to me? Can I take this risk to tell her that song was meant for her? She's my capital T. She's my only princess, can I take this risk really? I want to tell her so many things. Like she's the best kisser in the world even if I've never had choices to compare with. She's the most beautiful lady I've ever seen. She has the most beautiful emerald eyes . Body killer and everything.

Have I told you how wonderful she looks when she's riding her motorbike. Oh God, can there be any possibility God is unfair?How can one person be that beautiful. Everything that sits on her is just so elegant. Hair so pitch and wondrously long. Butt so round and protruding. Lips so soft, so pink and mouthwatering. Waist oh no that's too much of perfection. Flawless skin I'm tempted to ask her the type of lotion she uses to help my nanny Cassandra, She's the one who keeps nagging me to google for her the best body lotion for women, that woman can't be any funnier. She's the only woman I can tolerate apart from Feisty who is intolerable for now but I hope she'll be tolerable someday. I hope and I'll still keep hoping.

The worst Friday ever is today but it was somehow sweet. It's bad because the weather was so dull at the morning and there's no party tonight or anything that Will keep my thoughts guarded.

I know she's pushing me way but what I did today I don't know if it will make her more mad at me or what. But that's the sweetest part.

Together with the boys, that is Jelton, Dubel, Nard, Morgan and I, we joined the girl's lunch table. They were all shocked but there was nothing they can do. We ordered our lunch after everyone of us took their seats. I sat next to her of course, fries and two sausages is what she ordered. What's the funniest part here is I'm the one who ate all those fries and I did it on purpose. The burger I ordered was left untouched. She ended up eating her two sausages and some water.

And another sweet thing today is, she had her water in the water bottle I bought for her. So she accepted it, oh woman. The scowl she gave me while I kept stealing her fries one by one can't be any priceless. And that's what boosted me to keep picking them.

I had her favourite chocolate, so I opened her bag slowly which was hanging on the back of her chair when she was blabbing with her besties and ducked the chocolate in it. I stuck a grey sticker on it and scribbled small letters on it, 'Enjoy your favourite chocolate princess, please take it as my peace offering, don't throw it away.'

Lodzin told me that she likes dairy white chocolates and that's what I bought yesterday when I went to the mall. I don't know how I was going to give it to her but the opportunity just brought itself out.

So I'm on the parking lot ready to get into my car when I spots her Harley-Davidson Softail Deluxe motorbike a few feet away from my car. I look around and my eyes lands on her body leaning onto some car and she's busy talking to the person who is in the car. The person's head bobs out kissing her cheek and that's when I recognize that it's Camille. Oh Jesus the girl has a driver,so does it mean that she doesn't know how to drive? Whatever anyway. I hear her shout as the car engine starts.

"Oh bye see you on Monday! Yes next weekend it is at my place, oh Tiffany has left already and we didn't tell her." She gasps and Camille chuckles swatting her shoulder shouting back as the car starts moving.

"And that's why we have phones! Anyway we have next week still huh." She chuckles shaking her head as she moves towards her bike.

She hops onto it and the way her ass spikes out is what amuses me. Before starting it I shout as I partly lean on my car. "Nice weekend princess!"

She turns her head towards me and she f*****g smiles. For once, she truly smiles and then says "Likewise Bally."

Oh yes, Bally...

"Wait aren't you leaving yet?" She asks this time with a soft low tone.

"I am, just wanted to wish you a nice weekend." I wink feeling blissful because she's just talked to me today not about the project stuff as she did at the library.

"Look who's sweet today, anyway enjoy it." She waves her hand as she starts her bike and zooms off immediately without waiting for my reply. Atleast. I get in and starts my car following suit as the smile on my face tries to burst my face open. Oh princess...