RAY LINE

I THOUGHT YOU WERE A MISTAKE

I THOUGHT YOU WERE A MISTAKE

“Rayline my daughter, I thought I made a mistake, but I was wrong”, said Susan to her daughter.

My precious gold, I do not think you are too small to hear the story of how you come to be in my life. However, the person who planted you, like a seed in me wanted you terminated. I objected to his opinion, having known that no seed of a woman deserves to being destroyed. I realized we are living in a world where destroying embryonic life is a norm. I felt it is gross wickedness to destroy the embryonic life coming through me. I could not explain what was compelling me to think this way. Beyond the circumstances of my suffering, is the joy you bring to me when I see you, my little angel. I deliberately kept you because someday, you will make me proud and I will be glad I did not abort you when I was pregnant. However, keeping you cost me so much pain.

I realized while Bob was talking to me, I was drowsy and I had my eyes closed as if I was lost in my imagination and truly, I was. I felt a soft touch on my right ear like a tongue licking me. I could not resist the sensation as the vibration was driving me deeper into ecstasy. I felt intense pleasure but never saw the wildfire coming. Before I realize it was Bob licking my ears and pricking my n****e, I was already in consummation to want to dive deeper. It is a feeling I have never had and truly, words cannot describe how it feels. Nevertheless, you are the result of all that happened that day. It was only once and I got pregnant with you. It was as if the world came crashing on me, as I was now gnashing my teeth, not knowing exactly where to start from. I was somehow in a state of unconsciousness; however, my ears were actively active. With my eyes opened and I heard sounds through what looks like an open doorway. The sound I heard, seem to come from an invisible source. I thought I was dreaming, I mean, my realization that it was Bob talking to me is like a dream and it is like reading a fantasy romance novel from the Dreame website. Everything seems to appear as an occurrence in my imagination. However, the touch I felt was filling every part of my head and I cannot help but go ahead to enjoy the pleasure it brings. The feeling is soothing and not anyone would want to truncate the process. The feeling is of a tender touch that brings a feeling of s****l arousal. I noticed something going in and out of me, combing my honeycomb. The impression was painful, nevertheless, sweet as if sugarcane was given me, enjoying the sugar and feeling the pain from the lashes of the cane. I mean, Bob was making love to me without my formal approval and it all happened when I was still sleeping.

I woke up and realize Bob seated afar from the bed I lay. He was seating on a couch, wearing only inner pants. I could see his well-built body. His appearance is what every woman who needs a true man will desire. Nevertheless, I was not looking for a man, but a job. However, here I am feeling trapped by a man I do not even know too well. I thought he offered me help when he intends to give me what I want to take what he wants.

I feel exhausted as if I have run a marathon race. I later realize Bob from the drink he gave me drugged me. I felt the sensation in my head immediately after I took a sip. I could not understand what was happening to me, as I immediately started feeling dizzy and drowsy.

A month after my encounter with Bob, I started having the symptom of fever. I was now throwing up uncontrollable. By this time, Bob had travelled out of the town and left me enough money for my upkeep. I managed to return to Lucy, my friend whom I squatted with before Bob came into my life. I had to return to Lucy because I could not understand how I was feeling and I needed someone to talk to, someone whom I can confide in. Since I have known Lucy as a good friend, I thought, she is the best person to confide in her about what has happened and how I am feeling.

On reaching Lucy’s place, when she saw me, her question baffles me. In great amazement, Lucy asked me, “Susan, are you alright?” You look sick or should I say, “You look pregnant?”

When I heard these words from Lucy my friend, it was as if I had my heart ripped out of my chest, because Lucy has observed my greatest fear. If I am, from where do start and to whom do I run?

I pleaded with Lucy not to tell any person what I am about telling her. I told her what had happened between Bob and me. Lucy was speechless, but when she responded after, I could feel inside of me, the turmoil.

Lucy said, “Susan, you have to see the doctor now, to find out what is wrong with you.”

I was praying in my heart that what Lucy sense turns out as the contrary of what was happening to me. However, the confirmation can only be by seeing the doctor. I feel vulnerable and I wish I never accepted the offer from Bob. However, he seems nice, but I sense he is hiding something from me, which I later found out. I found out that Bob has his legitimate family in another down and was only using me, as his relief instruments when he comes to the town I am. That was why he rented an apartment for me and had his spare key, which he used to access the house anytime he wishes. Sometimes, I will hear the door opening around 1:00 am. I even started living in fear, because of the manner he comes to very late. Sometimes, he comes drunk.

“My daughter,” said Susan, “This is where desperation leads and inordinate desire will ruin your destiny if you decide to thwart your integrity for the offer of things you desire.