Where We Left Our Hearts

Olivia decides that she won't stay in Greenville longer. She will settle her grandmother's estate, figure out what to do with the house and café, then take Eva and return to the life they've built in Rosewood. It's a simple plan, she just needs to stick to it. Just when she was thinking about this sitting in the passenger seat, the car turns into the familiar driveway, and the pale-yellow house comes into view. Olivia falls silent. The house in front of her looks smaller than she remembers. White paint peels from the shutters, ivy creeps along one corner of the porch, and the old oak tree stretches its branches over the roof. Everything looks much as it did all those years, as though time has passed over the house without touching it. Through the windshield, she can see the porch where she spent summer evenings with her grandmother and brother, the kitchen window that used to spill the scent of freshly baked cake into the garden. She can picture her grandmother standing at the door, wiping her hands on her apron, asking why they have taken so long to arrive. The thought brings a small, painful smile to Olivia's lips. "Oh God" She whispers."I miss this place and I miss her so much." She has missed this place. More than that, she has missed the person who made it home. Yet whenever she thought about returning, she found countless reason to avoid. Now there will be no familiar voice calling her inside. No warm arms to welcome her back. She has arrived too late for all the things she imagined she would do when she finally came home. Her fingers tighten around the strap of her handbag. She had lost her parents when she was just a child. She doesn't remember what she felt then. Of course she missed them but losing her grandmother now feels different. This time, she is old enough to understand exactly what she has lost. Beside her, David reaches across the console and squeezes her hand. “Are you all right?” Olivia draws a slow breath. “I'm fine.” He gives her a look that makes it clear he doesn't believe her. She looks back at the house. “I missed Grandma. I missed this place. I just didn't think I'd have to come back without her.” David's expression softens. She was ten and david was eight when their parents died, too young to understand the full weight of their loss but old enough to remember how frightening it was to lose the only life they'd known. Their grandmother gave them a home again. She made them feel safe, loved and over time, the three of them became a happy family. Now she is gone, too. Olivia looks down at their joined hands. “I should have come home more often,” she whispers. This guilt had been inside her for months. She has always found reasons to postpone a visit, promising herself there will be more time once work settles down, once life becomes less complicated, once she can return without bringing her troubles with her. “Liv, don't.” David shakes his head gently. “You loved her. She knew that.” “I know.” Olivia swallows. “I just wish I had more time with her.” “So do I.” He squeezes her hand again. “We've lost a lot,” he continues. “Mum and Dad, then Grandma. I know coming back brings up things you'd rather not think about.” He pauses, choosing his words carefully. “But you're not alone. You have me. You have Eva. We'll figure things out together.” Olivia looks at her younger brother. For a moment she sees the little boy who used to crawl into her bed after a nightmare, clutching his pillow and asking her to stay awake until he fell asleep. Back then, she held him close and promised she would always be there. He had kept this promise for her too. She leans across the console and hugs him. David holds her without hesitation, one hand resting against the back of her head. “Thank you,” she whispers. “You don't have to thank me. I'm your brother.” “I know.” She draws back and wipes beneath her eyes. “But I'm going to anyway.” He gives her a small smile. For few seconds, they sit together in the quiet car, neither of them in a hurry to move. Finally, David glances towards the back seat. “Come on. She must be hungry, let's get her settled before she starts to throw tantrums.” A small laugh escapes Olivia, easing the tightness in her chest. “True. She becomes a real monster when she's hungry.” He climbs out, and Olivia follows. Eva is already standing beside the car, gazing at the house with wide, curious eyes. Her pink backpack hangs from one shoulder. “Wow!” she exclaims. “It's beautiful! Just like the castle in The Princess and the Rabbit, Mama. Can we stay here?” Olivia smiles at her daughter's excitement. For Eva, this is a new place, untouched by the memories that make Olivia's chest ache. She can see the house through her daughter's eyes for a moment: the tall tree, the garden, the old porch that seems to promise countless hours of playtime. She wants Eva to have happy memories here, too. She wants her daughter to know where she had grown up. “We can stay here for a few days, sweetheart,” she says. “Then we'll have to go back home. Your friends will be waiting for you.” Eva's expression changes. She looks down, picking at the strap of her backpack. “I don't want to go back.” Olivia crouches beside her. “Why not, sweetheart?” Eva hesitates. “I dont like them.” The words catch Olivia off guard. “Who is, darling?” “The children at school.” Eva's fingers tighten around the strap. “They say mean things about you, Mama. And they say I don't have a daddy.” Olivia freezes. This is the first time Eva has mentioned it. It completely catches her off guard. Gathering herself, she puts on a forced smile. “I'm sorry, sweetheart,” Olivia says softly. “I didn't know.” Eva blinks quickly. “They laugh when I tell them to stop.” She looks up at her mother, her eyes uncertain. “I do have a daddy, don't I, Mama?” For a moment, Olivia can't breathe. The question is so small, so innocent. But Olivia can't give her an answer. Eva looks at Olivia with the same eyes as of him. Eva's father. She wants to gather Eva into her arms and tell her how wonderful her father once was. How tenderly he loved her. How he was once the safest place for Olivia. She cannot explain to her daughter about her father without opening a door she has spent six years trying to keep closed. Before Olivia can find the words, David appears beside them. “Hey, Princess. I need your help with something.” Eva sniffs and looks up. “With what?” “Grandma's house needs inspecting. I can't possibly do it alone.” “Inspecting for what?” “Monsters, obviously.” “Uncle David, monsters aren't real.” “Good. Then we'll finish quickly.” A reluctant smile tugs at Eva's mouth. She is obsessed with playing detective and searching for non-existent monsters. David holds out his hand. “Come on, boss. Show me where to start.” “I'm the boss?” “Obviously.” Eva slips her hand into his. David gives Olivia a brief, understanding look before scooping Eva into his arms. “First, the living room,” he announces, carrying her towards the house. “Then we'll check the kitchen.” “What if it's a friendly monster?” Eva asks, beginning to brighten. “Then we'll ask it to help us unpack.” Their laughter drifts back across the driveway. Olivia remains standing beside the car. I do have a daddy, don't I, Mama? The words kept repeating in her mind. How is she supposed to explain it to Eva? How can she tell a little girl that her father exists somewhere beyond the boundaries of their small world and that he once made it painfully clear he wanted nothing to do with either of them? The memory she has failed to erase for six years rises before her with merciless clarity. ------------- Flashback She stands outside the clinic, one hand resting protectively over her lower abdomen, clutching the ultrasound report. Rain pours from the dark sky, soaking the pavement and blurring the world beyond the clinic entrance. People hurry past under umbrellas, but Olivia barely notices them. She can think of only one person. Him. She calls him. Twice. The phone rings until the call disconnects. No answer. Her throat tightens. She knows he is angry with her. She knows he believes she has betrayed him and she can't pretend she doesn't understand how painful it is for him. Still, he has the right to know about this. Her fingers tremble as she opens the voice-message option. “I...” Her voice trembles. She swallows and tries again. “I know I've let you down. I too don't want things to become like this. But please, just talk to me one last time.” Rain slides down her face, mingling with the tears she can no longer hold back. “There's something important I need to tell you.” She looks down at the ultrasound report. “I..., I'm pregnant. Please. I am...I am scared, please call me.” She sends the message before she can lose her courage. For a few seconds, she stands motionless beneath the grey sky, staring at her phone. She knows he will listen. Her phone chimes. A message from him. Olivia opens it. Are you even sure it is mine? Whatever happened between us ended that day. Don't know whose bastard you are carrying. I hate you. Her breath catches. Her fingers tighten around the phone until her knuckles turn white. For a moment, she can't seem to draw air into her lungs. She stares at the screen of her phone, her lips parting in disbelief, hoping the man who once held her so tenderly couldn't possibly have written something so vicious. How can he write such words? She had never believed those words are from him if these recent events hadn't happened in their life. She imagines him saying them to her with the hateful eyes. She feels as if someone stab her with thousand knives. Her knees weaken. She presses one hand against the wall to steady herself, the ultrasound report crumpling in her other hand. Rain runs down her face, mingling with the tears she can no longer hold back. She knows she has hurt him. She knows he believes she has betrayed everything they have shared. She expects anger, perhaps even hatred directed at her. But she never imagined he could look at the news of their child and respond with such contempt. He hasn't asked her to explain. He hasn't even given her a chance. The humiliation burns almost as much as the hurt. She stands among strangers, clutching the first glimpse of their baby to her chest, feeling foolish for having hoped the news might soften his anger. She wants to call him, to demand how he can say such a thing about their child. Instead, she lowers her head and cries, ashamed of how desperately she still wants him to take it back. She has loved him. Even now, some part of her waits for him to call. He never does. Eventually, the tears give way to anger, and the anger to a quiet, aching resolve. She will not call again. She will not plead with him to believe her or beg him to accept a child he has already rejected. What will she do alone? The thought terrifies her. But when she rests her hand over her stomach, a strong determination rises within her. She will bring this child into the world and give all the love she can. She will raise their child alone. End of Flashback ------------------- Now, standing outside the house Olivia blinks back her tears. I do have a daddy, don't I, Mama? She has no answer that won't hurt. Inside, Eva's laughter rings through the house. Olivia listens. She wants to hold on to that laughter. She wants to protect Eva from every unkind word, every disappointment, every truth that might hurt her. But how long can she keep this secret. How long can she shelter her little girl from the cruelty of this world. She will find out the truth someday. Olivia takes a deep breath. She will have to tell her someday. But for now, she will give her daughter all the love and care she can. She will give her all the happiness. And one thing is sure, she will not let the shadow of his brutal words fall on Eva's life. Not ever. He made his choice six years ago, and Olivia made hers..