The Mystery of Eloua

I am tired… very tired. Due of what I feel, I do not even know what is the real feeling of being tired because I just feel numb and I think, that is even worst. However, I need to keep going because that is the only choice I have. I packed up my things because I will end up nothing if I will keep ranting here. After this graveyard shift on this coffee shop, I need to ready myself to enter on my real job. I took me twenty minutes walking down the streets because I cannot afford to grab a taxi, and when I entered the not-so-famous restaurant where I am working, the bodyguard greeted me “good morning,” and I just gave him a fake smile. Can anyone please remind me how to smile genuinely? Or can someone teach me how to do so? Because to be honest, I already forgot how. It’s been how many years since I smile… and I pity myself for that.  “Eloua,” said by the woman who offered me this job and on the other hand, my manager. “Can I have a minute?” I nodded and followed her as I gave a what-happened-look to my co-worker, Zoe, but she just shrugged. I feel unusual… something like, there is a chill going up on my system. Breathing heavily and shaking my head to get rid of the negativity booming inside of me, I opened the door with cold hands, asking Lady Luck to be on my side, praying and hoping that something good will happen. “What?” I asked due to my dismay. “That is the only way to save the restaurant,” she held my hand and continued. “Ma’am, you badly know that I need money. How can you do this to me? I mean, why me?” Madam Dutché stood on her swivel chair and walked towards me. How can riches be so cruel? I hate people who thinks about themselves not knowing that they can give chaos to others. I hate them… I hate society. “You are the best—” I interrupted her because I have no time for bullshits.  Frustratedly, I asked, “If I am the best, then why are you telling me to leave?” “I remember the time you told me that you need me here in your restaurant and answered you at first that I don’t want to.” I stood up and grabbed my bag and said, “I should have still said no even though you begged for me.” Madam Dutché was ten-year older than me but age does not matter when a law is being unfollowed and rules are not being regulated well. For Pete’s sake, I work here for almost five and a half years. This is my source of income, the only stable job I got, the only work I love to do and the work I am used to. Damn!