Loving a bully billionaire part 4!

Chapter 141

(what I put you through, Conor Maynard)

MIA’S POV I woke up to the smell of fresh coffee, toast, and eggs. I haven’t appointment a helper after Gretha, and Rosie would sure as hell not help herself. f**k! I yell when I realised it must be Griffin. I don’t want to be so angry at him, but he can’t just walk into our lives and be a father to Rosie, a child he never saw grew up or see how she suffered for the mistakes we both made. I quickly dressed in a gown and run downstairs.

“So, how was school yesterday? Did you make any friends?” I heard Griffin having a conversation with Rosie.

“Yeah, I did. Her name is Amila. She said her Father knew you.” My heart nearly stopped when she mentioned her friend knows the Bakers. “Yeah? And who is her father?” Griffin asked while he dished up.

“Jason. Apparently her father is in Iraq.” Griffin’s eyes turned big and that was my cue to cut the conversation short. I’ve seen that look before. That’s a frightening look.

“Rosie, you need to get dressed. It’s almost time to go to school baby.” I kissed her on her forehead while she jumped up and hugged Griffin. I waited for her to leave the kitchen.

“You can’t just walk into our lives and think that Rosie could be your daughter or ask her questions about school.” I moan.

“I wasn’t trying to do that,” he replied while he placed some eggs and toast in front of me with a cup of coffee. “Who is Jason?” I asked.

“I don’t know.” he turned his back while answering me.

“Cut the bullshit, Griffin. I saw your face. You knew exactly who Rosie was talking about.”

I shoved the plate to the side.

“No one, I don’t know who he is.”

“Yeah, here we go again with the lies. I need to get dressed and get Rosie to school.

” I stand up from the chair and walked upstairs. I hate feeling so bitter after I just healed and made peace that Griffin died and left me. He left a hole inside me that not even his return can heal again. He broke me as a person, and even though I do still love him, I can’t let go of the fact that he made me a person I never wished to be. I cried for years. I gave in to s**t that I hated. Being paranoid and drinking, not just that, I detained myself between these four walls and it killed me as a person with Rosie. I can see she’s excited that we might be a family again, but I don’t feel ready to just pick up the pieces after 7years. 7years of missing him, loving him even though he put my life and Rosie’s life in danger over and over again. This hole I feel inside me is burning and I can’t heal it with a ghost I missed for 7years.

“Mom, can we go?” Rosie pulled me out of my thoughts. My thoughts of missing Griffin, my thoughts of just going downstairs and kissing him. Maybe that will fill the hole, but I know it’s just wishful thinking.

“Are you okay?” she asked with her backpack on her shoulder.

“We still have to pack lunch,” I said, grabbing my bag.

“No need, dad already did it.” She smiled. I know she’s excited to have him here, even though she never knew him. I guess it’s more the fact that she doesn’t have to suffer from all my crying and isolation.

“He did?” I asked.

“Yeah, he made me a burger, and don’t tell him, but he gave me a doughnut.” I rolled my eyes. It’s moments like this I wished for, but my mind refuses to forgive him, even though my heart missed him so much. I missed everything we used to be.

“Let’s go.” I fixed her ponytail and grab her hand to go downstairs.

“See you after school, baby girl,” Griffin yells from the study. She smiled and grab my hand again. I smiled and Griffin returned an even bigger smile. I don’t just want to give in like this. I want him to understand how I suffered, how I spoke to him day in and day out. How I wished for him to walk through the door and that everything was just a terrible nightmare.

I dropped Rosie off at school, and the excitement on her face is astonishing. I drove back home but took longer than usual. I don’t know how to face Griffin. I don’t know how to give in to the temptation of missing him and just kissing him. Lucas opened the gate for me and with every bone in my body, I dragged myself out of the car to face the ghost I missed for 7years.

“Hey,” he responded when I opened the front door.

“Hey.” I placed my bag on the counter in the study and text Dawn that I won’t be going to the office today. “You want something to drink and....”

“Why?” I cut him short.

“Why what?” he asked, knowing exactly what I mean.

“I’ve missed you so much, and with my broken heart I had to watch at pictures where Rosie and I had to take without you, even if I pretend that this was just a dream and pick up the pieces and go on, I can’t. I miss how we used to be, even if it’s just for a while, I want to feel you, I want to sink into reality that you here, I want to erase the last 7years of hell.” he looks stunt at me, shocked and surprised. I know I have to deal with reality, but my heart is missing him.

“I know things will never be the same, but I need you to understand baby, that everything I did was for you and Rosie. I’ve missed you, but I couldn’t see the damaged cliff fall on you or Rosie. So I had to do this for the last 7years.”

I sit down on the ground. I can’t bear the ongoing pain of not having physical contact with him. I need to feel him, even if it’s just for a second. I stood up from the floor and sit on his lap. This time I closed my eyes and just forget about the last 7years.

“Kiss me,” I begged him.

“Mia!” he sighs, knowing that I’m just doing this to feel whole again, even if it’s just for a while.

“Kiss me Griffin, or leave.” He placed his lips on mine softly. Both of us emotionally gave into the pain and emptiness we felt for 7years. His eyes turned soft. I swivel my lips upward in a semblance of a smile. I took a deep breath before Griffin kissed my neck.

The physical contact made my body shiver, exactly how I remembered it. I’m numb, more than what I ever was before. The hollow in my chest filled up. I know it’s my mind playing tricks, but for now, I will take it. Griffin’s eyes got lost in mine as he kissed my nose, then my lips, his beautiful eyes burning through my core again. Everything I missed was filling my heart in seconds. Tears swim in my eyes as Griffin caress my cheeks. How long will this incredibly overpowering feeling last? An hour, maybe two? The feeling is so painful that I reject it immediately. Griffin inhales sharply like he was longing for this moment more than I was. “I’m tired of crying,” I said, my forehead against his, trying to keep my emotions in check.

“I’ve tried everything to forget our life together, just so I can live my life without you. Nothing was the same, even the danger we were in. I still missed you. I missed everything we used to be.” he tugs my hair and pulled me closer to him, his arms wrapped around me. This is where I want to be, but not supposed to be. He smells exactly how I remember him, except for the constant smell of alcohol. He runs his index finger down my cheek, and I had to admit that I lied last night. I do feel it; I feel it all. I feel the passion, the love, the lust, but most of all, the physical contact that takes away all my pain. “I’m sorry.” He said with a soft voice. His hands and lips are still all over my body. The Need for him explodes through my body while kissing him back, matching his breathing, my hands tangling in his hair, pulling it. He groans a low seductive tone in the back of his throat that rumbles through me, and his hand moves down my body to the top of my thigh, his fingers digging into my flesh.