No Such Thing

A Mother's Gift

Nora settled everyone in. Made sure teeth were brushed, pajamas were put on correctly. Books were put back into backpacks and clothes were laid out for the next morning. She made sure everyone was tucked in, even Zan and Gabe. No matter how old they are, they will always be her babies. She closed doors behind her and walked to Cayden’s door. She heard him talking and slowed before she knocked.

“Jem, we can make this work. It doesn’t look like it now, but we can and we will.” She heard his voice quiver. Her heart broke for him. She could feel his light dim. It’s hard to explain, but her connection to her children is more than maternal, it's eternal. She heard the receiver hit the ground and lightly knocked on the door. Nothing. She could feel him sinking. A darkness filling his room. She knocked again and opened the door. She felt the darkness begin to retreat back into the walls. She slowly approached him, nonchalantly. “Time for bed dear.” She said heading towards his dresser, getting socks and underwear out.

“You don’t have to do that mom. I’m 16 not 6.” He said, sadly.

“What’s wrong my love?” She asked as she slid towards him. Scooting next to him on his bed. Her voice soothing, inviting.

“She broke up with me” Cayden stared at the wall as he spoke to her. A somber tone, sad.

“I’m sorry.” Is all she could say and she pulled him to her, and held him. “I don’t care if you’re 16, 6, 61. It makes no difference to me. When my children hurt, I hurt.” She held him tighter. He let go and began to cry. After a long few moments he loosened his hold on her giving her the queue to let loose.

“I’m fine mom. Thank you. I knew it was coming but I tried.” He said fiddling with his fingers. He looked her in her eyes. Eyes that he has never been able to lie to. She always knew. Eyes that would soothe even the wildest beast. Eyes that would burn through your soul if you did something wrong. “I don’t like it here.” He said, a matter of factly. “I don’t think it was fair for Dad to pull us away from our lives. To move here and there every few months. It’s not normal. It’s not sane. It’s not helpful! He began to break up again but stopped his sobs before they came fully to the surface. “Don’t get me wrong, mom. I know this is his work. I know this is our legacy. I know our family has done this for centuries.” He looked her in the eyes again. “But I don’t want that for myself. I want to build a life somewhere. With someone.” She pulled him to her again, set her chin on his head and hugged him.

“Cayden, you can choose any life you want.” She kissed the top of his head. “As your father chose his. He chose us. That is why we go with him. Your grandfather left him and your grandma for months while he did his job. At times, he still leaves her.”

He didn’t know that. He thought this is how it was, for every generation.

“Your father grew up without his complete family. You, my love, get your father every day. He has NEVER spent a night away from us.” She was telling the truth. He always saw his father at the end of the day. “We may move a lot, but it isn’t the place that makes the home. It’s the people in it.” She smiled at him. “Girls will come and go in your life. It’s part of being an adult, and my love. You will soon be an adult. And a fine man you will be, are. I’m proud of the young man you’ve become. Please never stop being you. My life would be so boring!” She said, smiling at him. He giggled. “Thanks mom.” He hugged her back. She stood. “Now, get ready for tomorrow and get to bed. Don’t forget to brush your teeth. I love you Cayden, and so does your father. Very much!” She emphasized.

Turning around she walked to his bedroom door. “Hand the phone up please.” She closed the door behind her. Nora loved her children. So much, she filled them with light everytime she was close to them. It was her gift to them. She walked down the stairs to the second floor and headed to the double doors at the end. Once inside her room she relaxed. Smiled. And began her own evening rituals.