Kiss me goodbye

12

When I woke up, I saw a room I didn’t recognize. Looking around I tried to figure out where I was. I tried to stand up and walk around but there was something holding me down. Something heavy.

Looking down I saw it was a hand.

I looked under the covers to see all my clothes on me. I sighed in relief. So, I turned around and I saw Jay sleeping next to me. He looked very young and carefree.

I trailed his cheek bone with my finger to his lips.

“You know if you keep touching me like that I won’t hold back.” He growled silently without opening his eyes.

I quickly pulled my hand back. But he reached for it and kissed my palm and put it back on his cheek. When he finally opened his eyes, I could see them filled with l**t.

I tried to move away but his grip on my waist became stronger and more determined to keep me in place.

“Stop moving.”

I almost asked him why but then I felt it when he pulled me closer to him.

And now I am sure my face is as red as a tomato. Jay just chuckled and put his face in my neck.

We stayed like that for a while just lying in bed in silence. The silence was broken by my stomach. My face was red once again and Jay just chuckled.

“Come on. Let’s get you something to eat.”

Coming in the kitchen I saw that there was no one here.

“Where is everyone?”

Jay started cooking and I went to help him but he just said to sit and look pretty.

“How did I end up here?”

Jay froze a moment before deciding to tell me. He told me everything. From Sam dying to me not wanting to let go and the doctor sedating me.

the room was filled with silence after that and I realized that it is real and not a dream. Sam is dead.

But I could feel that there is something Jay isn’t telling me. And just when I wanted to ask him, I heard footsteps. And a minute later there was Dr. Charlie at the kitchen entrance.

“Beta Jay. Rebecca.”

I said a silent hello in return and I turned around seeing that a plate with food was already placed in front of me.

I started eating and the whole time Jay and doctor were talking. I saw their eyes were glazed over and figured they are talking mind to mind or mind linking. Soon the doctor left and it was just Jay and me.

“Where did the doc go?”

“He went back to the clinic.”

He became nervous and I couldn’t watch him like that so I stopped eating and asked what is bothering him.

“Yesterday…when I was taking you up to my room…you started bleeding from your nose.”

I froze. Blood ran from my face and my face was probably as pale as a wall. Jay was still talking but I wasn’t listening. I couldn’t. I knew where this was going.

A part of me is mad he let the doctor run a few tests without my approval. But a big part of me was relieved, because now I know I have to tell him. Otherwise, I wouldn’t.

“Please say something.” was what got me out of my thoughts.

“I’m sick.” I whispered. And I told him everything, from the beginning. How this is not the first time. And how nobody but my family knew.

Jay started pacing in the kitchen muttering something to himself. Suddenly he punched a wall and sat down against the wall.

For some time, I didn’t know what to do or what to say so I just sat there not doing anything.

Then when I stood up and walked to him, he stood up to and left. I sat down on the same spot he was sitting.

I felt like crying but decided against it. So, I stood up and left.

***

-Rebecca at home-

I thanked Ophelia for driving me home. When I walked in the house, I saw that my dear brother was visiting. And later heard too when I neared my room. Our rooms where right next to each other and the walls were pretty thin so I decided to rather go in the living room and wait for them to finish.

I swear I can never look at my brother the same again. Not after this.

I laid down and just stared at the ceiling for a good while before I heard giggles and footsteps nearing the living room.

“Hey. I didn’t know you were home. When did you come?”

I sat up and looked at both Matt and Tina who was blushing.

“Oh I just came. I was at Ella’s.”

“You okay? Did you tell her?”

“No. There wasn’t any time. Can I talk to you? Alone?”

“I’m gonna leave you two alone. I’ll be in your room.” Tina excused herself and Matt sat down beside me.

“What’s wrong?”

“It’s Sam. He’s…he’s dead. He died yesterday in the morning.”

I explained everything, of course, I didn’t tell him the truth. He would think I’m going mental. I told him what bot Ella and me agreed on yesterday and that is that he had a car crash and was in coma for a month before dying from internal bleeding.

Afterward heh hugged me and let me cry on his shoulder.

Sometime while I was numb in his arms Tina brought us some blankets and soon, I fell asleep.

The next morning, I didn’t go to school. And neither did I go the day after that or the day after. Or any day this week.

Soon it was the day of Sam’s funeral. There was the entire basketball team since Sam was a part of it since freshmen year. And the cheerleader squad as a support to Ella. Ella wasn’t a part od the cheerleading squad but she did help them once when there was a cheerleader sick. There were also all of our teachers and a lot of students from school.

Everybody knew and loved Sam.

There were a lot of great speeches about Sam and what a great person he was. His parents asked me and Ella to make a speech together. So, when it was our turn we went up and started talking.

“Hi. My name is Rebecca and this is Ella. Sam was…is very important to both of us. He was my best friend. And always will be. He was like a brother to me. I remember that one time in middle school when he…when he came up to me asking to be my friend. At first, I thought what a weirdo but then I automatically said yes. I started thinking that maybe it won’t be that bad to have a friend. And to be honest first I was annoyed by him but soon he turned out to be one of my favorite people that I know.” I started crying after that and I could not continue anymore. So, Ella started talking.

“Hi. I’m Ella. I was Sam’s girlfriend. I love him very much. He was my first love and I will always love him.” even Ella started crying. So, Matt and Ella’s father came to us and took us away. While Ella’s mother went to finish our speech that was written on the paper.