Torment: Book Two of Shadow goddess series (COMPLETE)

Chapter Ten

Knowing looks were cast our way as we entered the main living area. Everyone was sitting around the fireplace talking, seeming at peace for once in a little while, it made me smile. I knew it couldn’t last, but I could give us a few days, we deserved it. We were shielded after all, and safe for now. Should anything happen, I would know the instant it hit the barrier, and would have plenty of time to get everyone up. And that’s if it’s even necessary. Hades and I should be enough should it come down to it. I will keep the others out of any fighting at all costs. If I was destined to protect, connect or whatever this realm then I would do so my way. That included keeping my men in the dark about any danger unless necessary.

I scanned the room briefly until my eyes landed on Ryker. I smiled, and bound over to him like was some kind of kangaroo and bounced right into his lap, wrapping my hands around his neck. Ryker was stunned speechless, his eyes wide. But his arms wrapped around my waist nonetheless. I smiled down at him and the confusion in his red eyes. I waited a minute for everything to register to him, all the while chuckling under my breath.

“Well, good afternoon to you too.” I laughed when he didn’t recover.

“I…uh…” Ryker shook his head like he was trying to clear a fog. “Good afternoon.” He mumbled.

I just laughed and gave him a kiss before getting up and moving to Phoenix, placing myself in his lap. Phoenix didn’t need anytime at all. He automatically wrapped me in his arms and held me against his chest. Another purring sound vibrated my chest.

“Oh for the love of the gods. Hades, why do I keep purring?” I demanded.

Everyone laughed and Hades eyes gleamed. “You are a god, gods do a lot that you didn’t use to. A purring sound means you are happy, content. A growl could mean many things.” He paused looking at me making my cheeks flush.

“Oh, well okay.” I snuggled back down into Phoenix, another purr vibrating my chest. I just shrugged it off. No need to be shy about it, I was happy. I was content here among my men and my guardian.

“How are you doing Aaron?” I asked turning to where he was, sitting in the shadow of the room.

“You always know where I am. I can never hide from you.” Aaron chuckled as he seemed to appear out of thin air. The others all went rigid when they found out they were being watched and I just laughed. “Can’t exactly hide from the goddess of shadows in the shadows.” I laughed.

“Wait, what?” Phoenix leaned back to look at me.

“Well according to Nyx the goddess of night I am apparently the goddess of shadows and power, whatever that means.” I shrugged. “Either way I am me again, and I couldn’t be happier. Which reminds me.” I turned to phoenix and clutched his face in my hands. “I’m sorry for how I treated you. I never should have done that.”

“It’s alright Rose. I’m just glad you walked away before you went off. We all wanted to help.” He told me, motioning to the others in the room. “But we eventually realized we couldn’t help unless you wanted us to. So we all settled outside your door until you were ready for us.”

“Even still. I never should have gone off at all, not over something so small.” I smiled sadly at the memory before looking back up into his silver eyes. “Well, either way I’m back. Kind of. Changed but back all the same.”

I was suddenly swept off Phoenix’s lap. I squeal at the sudden and unexpected motion; my hands automatically flew around the person’s neck and I held myself tightly to whomever it was. His scent if cinnamon and spice had me smiling, as Ryker sat me back down on his lap locking his hands around my waist so no one could steal him away from him. I think he also hoped I couldn’t get away. I wonder if I could? Not that I was going to try, but I still wondered.

“Well, hello again.” I smiled.

“Hello beautiful.” His red eyes seemed to sparkle back at me. His stark burgundy red eyes never ceased to amaze me. Again, like a finely aged wine.

“Still such beautiful eyes.” I murmured, tracing my finger around them lightly. “They always surprise me. Did you know they changed color? I’ve noticed they changed based off your mood.”

“Really?” He questioned, running his own hand down the length of my face.

“Yes.” I shuddered. “When you’re mad, they brighten, almost turn the color of blood. When you’re happy or they are a burgundy color, like I said before. Dark, like a finely aged wine. Relaxed, they are almost like a garnet color. Honestly amazing to watch.”

“What are we doing today about the Academy?” Cassius spoke up and asked.

“First, we figure out who that man that was in my uncle’s office is. We can’t exactly go in blind.” I turned to hades. “Can gods change their forms? Make themselves bigger or smaller?”

“Yes, any god may change their form. Make you see whoever you want them to. Some do not even hide themselves, just make themselves bigger or smaller as the situation calls for it. Can you describe the man within this Academy of yours?”

“Uh yeah. He was big, but not quite as big as Phoenix.” I said motioning to him. “He had tanned almost caramel skin color.” I hummed, closing my eyes to think. “Black hair and amber like eyes. That’s all I can remember though.” I trailed off. “Oh, and he wore white leather. He kept his chest bare and just wore a white leather looking vest and pants.”

I thought I’d seen Hades go still, thought I had seen him go rigid, but nah. This was beyond any of that. If I didn’t know better, I would think he was made of stone or marble. Whatever. The point is he didn’t move, he didn’t even twitch. I patted Ryker’s arm lightly and he nodded letting me up from his lap. I made my way to hades and dropped to my knees in front of him. I held his face in my hands and stroked his cheekbones softly with my thumbs.

“Hades, my love?” I whispered, trying to get him to look at me. “Love, look at me. Please. Come on.” He still didn’t move and he was starting to scare me. I looked over my shoulder at everyone else, I’m sure my panic more than obvious in my eyes. They all stood but shrugged. I sighed, shaking my head as I turned back to Hades. He still hadn’t moved, his muscles didn’t twitch under my touch like they always had. I was truly terrified for him. I looked over my shoulder again and stared at the others for a long moment. “Can you give me a few minute with him?” They all nodded, leaving the room slowly.

I thanked them, turning back to Hades. I didn’t know what to do, didn’t know what was going on with him. I needed to think. What could have caused this and why? I shook my head that didn’t matter.

“Hades, please.” I begged, lightly patting his cheek. “Please look at me.” Nothing. I felt tears well in my eyes. Nothing I did was getting to him. “Hades.” I cried, my voice breaking. “You can’t do this; you can’t leave me like this. I know you can hear me; you have to hear me. Come back to me please.”

When he still didn’t respond I dropped back from my knees onto my heels and just stared at him. No, I wouldn’t accept this. I knew he wasn’t dead; I could hear his heart beating. It was steady even if a little slow for him. His skin was still warm and his breathing slow and even. It was like he was stuck inside his own head. No, I would not allow him to leave me like this.

I cleared my throat and wiped the tears from my cheeks even if more flowed to replace them. I moved back onto my knees and placed my hands on either side of head by his temples. His heart beat against my hand helping me concentrate. Then I just thought my desire. Take me to Hades. Even in my mind my voice sounded small, quiet and pained. The worry and sadness were impossible not to notice.

The world around me dissolved away as I was sucked into a new one. I recognized it from Hades’ memories, it was Mount Olympus. Hades stood in the middle of a large room. White, no windows no doors, nothing. And yet all he did was stand, motionless, still. I opened my new senses and expanded them over the entire room. There was nothing here except Hades and some kind of shield surrounding him. No not a shield, like three-hundred-and-sixty-degree version of a TV screen. It was showing him the underworld, making him believe he was still trapped. Anger, so pure, so unhinged I lost it.

A scream left me, a sonic wave following in its wake. It shattered whatever was surrounding Hades. He shook his head to clear it, I could see the confusion, sorrow and loss on his face. Until the room registered and fury replaced it. He spun taking in the room, my eyes never left him. But now I was the one who was rigid, shaking, trembling in anger. I clenched my fists at my sides struggling to hold back the power building in me, but it seemed all but impossible.

I saw Hades move towards me quickly, could see every movement as if it were in slow motion. His face clear of all sorrow now, relief and concern. His hands moved to my face, his fingers roaming it lightly as if memorizing me, though I knew that he knew every part of me. When he registered, I wasn’t responding, I saw his lips start moving, but no words reached me, no sound left him. Not that I could hear.

Someone had trapped Hades in his own hell, allowed him to believe his time with me was fake, a dream. Such a morbid way to punish him. To torture him. I growled, as if he hadn’t been tortured enough, punished enough. Some ass hole had to go and do it all over again? No. Not no, but hell no. They reached Hades where I couldn’t protect him, they would do the same to the others. No one would do this to them again, I wouldn’t allow whoever it was to torture them. I was spiraling again, but this time over the right thing, for the right reasons. No one would ever return to this room, this space of nothingness.

I turned my eyes to Hades, I knew they were devoid of any emotion but anger. I ran my hand through the air in front of him, sending him back to his body, back to himself. I stayed back glowering at the room. I sneered at the room, levitating myself into the air of this nothingness. And with no thought at all the power I was holding back to protect Hades, shot out of me. The room glowed with a brilliant purple light before it complete shattered around me. It was done, over.

I closed my eyes willing myself back to my body. My consciousness easily obeyed, dropping me back to myself where I still sat with my hands on Hades’ temples. Hades now though also had his hands on my face, stroking up and down my cheekbones lightly, speaking something to me, but I couldn’t quite make out what yet. When I fully settled, I heard Hades repeating the same words I had said to him, the same pain in his voice. I hadn’t noticed I was still crying until a sobbed gasped left me, my eyes flying open wide. I threw myself at Hades, knocking him and the chair backwards. He had wrapped his arms around me taking most of the impact but I didn’t care one way or the other. I buried my face in his neck, clutching him to me as if here was a life line. My chest vibrated with something between a purr and a growl.

“Who?” My growled word was muffled against his neck, but I knew he heard me. “Who did it?”

Hades sighed, his hand rubbing up and down my spine in what was supposed to be soothing but I was still trembling with my anger, and even his touch wasn’t helping me right now. I didn’t know if it would.

“Zeus.” He finally breathed, his motions stopping and he just wrapped his arms around me holding me. “I did not know. He must have cursed me when he imprisoned me in the underworld. The description you gave was his. He made it to where I was unable to confirm or deny his identity. How did you break his hold?”

I grasped him tighter. “I didn’t know what was happening. Nothing I did was getting through to you. I tried but I couldn’t, so I did the only thing I thought I could do. I asked my power to bring me to you, and it did. I could see the spell around you, see what is was showing you, trying to make you believe.” I growled again, biting down on my bottom lip until it bled to stop it. "The rage Hades, pure and as hot as the sun filled me at what he was doing to you. Torturing you for fun, for his benefit. A scream, like a sonic blast left me, shattering the spell around you. Then I sent you away, back to your body so you’d be safe and I destroyed the room of nothingness so no one could ever be sent there again.”

My nails were digging into him by this point, but he didn’t seem to notice, didn’t even wince. He just kept holding me, stroking my hair. I pulled away from him allowing myself to look at him, see his golden eyes. I caressed his face in my hands as I leaned down and kissed him softly, tenderly. I pulled away and pressed my forehead to his, my eyes closed. “I thought…I didn’t know.” I shook my head. “I thought you were gone.”

“You freed me from his hold, modicum Rosa.” He murmured, placing a kiss to my forehead. “He can not reach me again.”

“I know.” I hissed. “I put a barrier around you and the others. No outside influences could ever enter you again. I made sure of it.” The rage was evident in my voice still, but I had a healthy grasp on my power now so there was no chance of any random bursts of power. That at the very least was a silver lining to this situation, if not anything else.

“What if I hadn’t been here?” I whispered. “What if I hadn’t awakened yet?” I bit the inside of my cheek at the damage that would have caused after Tristian’s death. The fury, the pain, sorrow and anguish of losing yet another one of my men. Though he wouldn’t have really been gone, would he? He would just be trapped in his own mind. Here but also not here at the same time. That would have been worse, so much worse.

“I do not know.” He told me honestly, shaking his head. “But you were here and you had awakened. There is no reason to worry otherwise.”

“I can’t help it.” I crawled off of him to sit beside him and wrap my arms around my legs and resting my chin on my knees. “I know, I mean up here, logically I know.” I told him pointing at my head. But here, I lay my hand over my heart. “I can’t seem to slow. I can’t seem to stop hurting.” I squeezed my eyes shut. “It’s just.. All the unknown that could have happened.” I looked back up at him, his face sad. “What I could or would have done." I sighed. "The whole situation terrified me, infuriated me, and sent such a sharp wave of anguish I didn’t know, don’t know, how to handle it all. This, these stronger emotions are hard. All the good I’ve felt, all the happiness and pleasure was a high I never wanted to come down from. But the negative it is just as consuming.”

Hades gathered me in his arms, his large form completely encompassing mine, and held me. “All of this will get easier Rosa, I promise you. You are only just awakened. Being a god can be trying. But it can also be beautiful, and happy. It can be joyous and full of life and love. All of us, human, supernatural and god alike experience pain and sorrow.” Hades stroked my hair as he spoke, and I found myself calming. “It will come easier.” He assured me again.

I knew he was right; I knew he was right. The good I had experienced has been amazing, thrilling. But the bad just as horrid. There had to be a happy medium, and there was no way to achieve this other than to ride it out. Let all of it consume me but not control me. Let myself experience all there is to being a god or goddess, and when I come out the other side, when all of this no longer weighs me down, I’ll go after Zeus, he won’t be able to hide from me. Until then, I’ll train with Hades, I’ll learn all there is to my power and how to control my emotions or use them to my advantage. The others will train among themselves. We would all get better, train harder. And maybe I will ask Hades how to create my own new species of supernaturals to help us. No matter which way any of this goes. Zeus will fall, or I will fall and take him with me.