Still Single, Still Standing

Nathan Cole was twenty-seven years old, and according to his mother, he was already "expiring." Not physically, of course. His mother simply believed that any man who reached twenty-five without a girlfriend was somehow approaching the emotional equivalent of spoiled milk. "At your age, your father already had me and your sister," Mrs. Cole would say while chopping vegetables aggressively. Nathan would nod politely. His father would quietly continue reading the newspaper, wisely pretending not to exist. On a normal Saturday morning, Nathan sat at the dining table eating cereal while watching videos about penguins. Penguins fascinated him. Not because they were cute. Well, okay, maybe because they were cute. But mostly because penguins somehow managed to find lifelong partners despite wearing the same outfit every day. Meanwhile, Nathan owned seventeen different shirts and still couldn't get a woman to remember his name. His mother entered the room carrying a plate of toast. "Do you know what day it is?" she asked. "Saturday?" "No." Nathan thought carefully. "National Penguin Appreciation Day?" "No!" She pointed dramatically at him. "It's your cousin Brian's wedding!" Nathan almost dropped his spoon. "Oh." "That's all you can say? Oh?" "What else am I supposed to say?" "Say congratulations! Say you're happy! Say you'll be next!" Nathan nearly choked on his cereal. "Mom, please don't curse me in the morning." His father coughed loudly to hide a laugh. Mrs. Cole glared at both of them. "You know, Nathan, your cousin is only twenty-four." "Congratulations to him." "And he's getting married." "Again, congratulations." "And you are twenty-seven." Nathan smiled. "Thank you for noticing." She placed a hand over her heart. "Lord, why did you give me a son who flirts with Wi-Fi signals instead of women?" "Dad flirts with newspapers." "Your father is retired. That's different." His father nodded solemnly. "Your mother has a point." "Traitor." "I raised you to be brave, son." "Brave enough for what?" "Women." Nathan stared at both parents. "I have survived customer complaints, office meetings, and your cooking, Mom. Surely that counts as bravery." His mother gasped. "My cooking?" "I'm kidding." "No, finish your last words." At exactly ten in the morning, Nathan drove to his cousin Brian's wedding. Weddings were dangerous places. They were like zoos. People observed single relatives with pity. Older women would whisper. "Such a handsome boy." "What a waste." "Maybe he likes men?" "No, he likes computers." "That's worse." Nathan knew this because he had heard them. Twice. As soon as he entered the venue, Aunt Margaret spotted him. "There you are!" Nathan froze. Like a deer. A very single deer. She hugged him tightly. "Nathan, dear, when are you getting married?" "Good morning to you too, Aunt Margaret." She ignored his sarcasm. "I know someone." "Everyone knows someone." "She's beautiful." "That's what serial killers say." Aunt Margaret frowned. "You're impossible." "Thank you." At another table, his cousins waved. Brian, dressed in a tuxedo, smiled proudly. "Nathan!" "Hey, groom boy." Brian laughed. "When's your turn?" Nathan sighed dramatically. "Not even five minutes." "It's tradition." "I hate tradition." "You'll find someone." "People also say aliens exist." "That's oddly specific." Nathan shrugged. "I've done my research." During the reception, things became worse. Because someone handed Nathan the microphone. Big mistake. "Say a few words!" Brian shouted. Nathan stood awkwardly. "I wasn't emotionally prepared for public speaking." Everyone laughed. He cleared his throat. "Brian, congratulations." More applause. "You've always been like a brother to me." "Aw." "And today, I learned something important." Everyone listened. "Apparently, people can actually find love." Laughter erupted. "So there is hope." More laughter. "Not for me, perhaps." Even the bride laughed. "But for humanity." His mother buried her face in embarrassment. His father laughed so hard that he almost spilled his drink. Nathan smiled. "Congratulations, Brian and Sophie. May your marriage last longer than my attempts at online dating." The entire room burst into laughter. Later that evening, Nathan sat alone near the buffet. Not because he was sad. He simply preferred cake over conversations. Cake had never rejected him. As he enjoyed his third slice of chocolate cake, his best friend Marcus appeared. "Three slices?" Nathan nodded. "Cake understands me." Marcus sat beside him. "You know, you're weird." "Thank you." "No, seriously." "Still thank you." Marcus laughed. "How have you reached twenty-seven without ever falling in love?" Nathan thought about it. "I don't know." "You've never even had a girlfriend." "Nope." "Not even in high school?" "No." "College?" "No." "Kindergarten?" "Marcus, I was busy learning colors." Marcus burst out laughing. "You know what your problem is?" "I smell nice?" "You're afraid." Nathan blinked. "Afraid?" "Yeah." "Of women?" "No." Marcus smiled. "Of getting hurt." Nathan stared at the crowd dancing happily. Maybe Marcus was right. Or maybe he wasn't. Honestly, Nathan had no idea. He had never experienced love. Never experienced heartbreak. Never experienced butterflies. Never experienced those silly romantic moments people talked about. And perhaps... Perhaps that was about to change. Although Nathan didn't know it yet. Because somewhere in the city— A woman named Emily Parker was currently arguing with a vending machine. And fate, apparently, had a strange sense of humor. End of Chapter 1