UNTIL DAYLIGHT

14

14.

Life is being with you

to bed,

everything else is expected.

After visiting Alessia, I went home to change and get to the bar for my shift. I put the keys in the lock and snapped open the door.

I found Mario in the corridor brushing his teeth, shirtless, in low-waisted orange shorts. I raised an eyebrow, closing the door behind me.

He removed the toothbrush from his mouth, went into the bathroom and heard him spit the contents out of his mouth, rinsing it, and returning to the hall in the same posture as before. I crossed my arms across his chest, waiting.

"Why did you turn off your cell phone? We were worried about you! Milla was really shitty about how you did it." Here is her usual accusatory tone in which I was the asshole, and the rest of the world, the victims.

But could it really be like this?

I looked at him with an annoyed expression, tired of being selfish towards me. Mario wasn't like that but, after discovering about me and Milla, he had changed.

"Mario, please! Lately you are heavy and unbearable!" I exclaimed, going to my room, and changing.

"Do you understand that my cousin's feelings are involved? Surely you were with some girl you recently met, and you also f****d us." He blurted out, gesturing with his arms.

"Mario, it's my c**k for what I do, do you understand? I care for Milla to death and you know it! You know very well what I am like when I don't win a match! I'm not like you, I'm not on you, breathless neck. Do me the pleasure to stop being selfish, that I see your cousin with me! "I headed for the door, slamming it.

I even forgot the keys.

I managed to hear Andrea ask what had happened, and Mario say "He's just nervous."

I was because of him. I was because of these absurd pressures. Ridiculous. I was tired of him getting into things he had nothing to do with, like my relationship, which I don't even know how to define, with Milla! He had started all by chance with her, one evening after the usual parties given by Diego, together with the others, in Genoa. We already knew her and I, and that evening we had completely let ourselves go. I confessed that I liked her, that I wanted to have more with her, and it was the first night we slept together. The only difference was that Milla was two years older than me. I was only 18, and she had recently turned 20. She was fragile, I understood that night, when she whispered that she was left with only what we were doing, and that, in a way, relationships frightened her, and I was always trying to justify her walking away, with this thought going back years and years. Years ago.

Mario, when he found out, said by herself, did not agree, he knew my problems with drugs, and he thought that I would drag Milla back into that dark alley. We didn't talk to each other for a while, but I continued to see her even without him coming to find out.

I took a deep breath and headed for work.

***

Milla: I got a job! I'm so happy.

Would you like an aperitif tonight? I want to see you!

I also have to talk to you ..

You: I don't know Mil .. Let's see! I'll let you know later.

Milla: Excuse me if I'm often heavy,

And that I begin to understand that we care about you, otherwise

as I thought ..

You are special, honey ..

I sighed as I read that message, so much so that I quickly put my cell phone in my pocket. Did they all have a deal to put pressure, confusion, and agitation on me today?

There wasn't much to do at work. Bad weather threatened yet another rain. I looked around, and the only people around were the usual ones who ran every morning to train, or stopped to buy a bottle of water, or for a coffee.

I put the tray under my arm, and saw her walking absently towards this side. I had her note folded into my wallet, I hadn't even saved her number.

Then I remembered this morning's kiss, and she felt my chest tighten.

I went after her, just a short distance away, I spoke:

"I think thinking about me too much distracts you .."

She gasped. I smiled, holding the tray tighter. We started having a little conversation. She asked me if this was the bar I worked in, and why I hadn't written to her.

In a sarcastic tone I asked her, "Should I have done this?"

An annoyed, embittered expression appeared on his face. She snorted and started walking.

He closed his eyes for a few seconds, making that decision like that, without thinking about it.

I grabbed her arm, pulling her towards me:

"Hei .. Hei .. Brake a little." I murmured in a low voice, looking around us to see if no one was looking at us: "I guess I have to get away from you .." I sighed. "I shouldn't have kissed you .."

Her face turned pale, and I knew she swallowed her saliva hard. I found her hand in her face. She had slapped me.

"f**k you, Mirko .." she whispered, tugging her arm out of my grip, and walking quickly.

I had done yet another bullshit of the day!

***

You: Milla, I don't want to go out tonight. Let's make

another time. I'm a little tired.

Milla: Okay.

I threw my cell phone on the bed, and then let myself fall, too, dead weight. I looked at the ceiling for answers to some imaginary questions that were buzzing in my head in that instant.

Why do you say things you regret so easily, right afterwards?

I was really a jerk with Alessia!

I snorted and got out of bed, putting on the sweatshirt. I took out my cell phone, wallet, and car keys.

I had to see her. I needed it! I didn't have to tell her those things, I was stressed out and she got in the way.

Often, certain actions have even more dire consequences.

I arrived in 10 minutes. I was tense, and kept my foot pressed to the accelerator. I wanted to be with her as soon as possible.

I saw her from outside, she was on the phone, nervous. She gestured, continued, until she brought her gaze to the screen, and then she closed the call, letting herself sit on the bed, one hand in her forehead, her back bent just forward. She too was exhausted, and I wanted to understand if I too had something to do with this malaise of her.

Even if it was already evident ..

I climbed up to the window and went inside. As soon as she saw me, she rolled her eyes, not at all surprised to see me there:

“What do you want?” She asked sour.

"I'm sorry for today, I was just stressed out .." she muttered.

" I do not care. "

"Yes, I do. Yes, I care about you, even if I don't know anything. Not a single drop of you. I would like to know, I would like to know you better .."

"Mirko, please, it's not evening .. Go away." She turned away from me, hugging herself.

I walked over to her and hugged her from behind against my chest. I put her lips on her shoulder, and began to rock her, in silence. I wanted her to understand that she could feel free with me, that she had to forgive me if I occasionally pushed her away, or, anyway, I would start doing it.

Hoping to have her in my life more frequently ..

That silence was devouring our negative thoughts, our questions, leaving us free to be two bodies in one, relaxed. She turned to me, meeting our eyes. She then she ran her hand over my face, leaving me a caress. I brought my face close to her, starting to kiss her. She didn't push me away, she returned those kisses like she was hungry.

She hungry for me. Of me.

I got to her bed, and once I sat down, she straddled me. Continuing to kiss each other, I started to let my hands wander over her body: from the breast to the back, and from the back to go down, and go around her again starting from her bare thighs. She was wearing shorts and a sweatshirt.

I squeezed one of her breasts in her hand, while her kisses were full of ardor, of desire. She closed her eyes, letting a moan escape her lips, and pressing herself closer to me. I was already aroused, and when she started swaying her pelvis, I almost lost her head! I wanted it. I wanted her so much, there, on her bed!

I kissed her neck, continuing to squeeze her breasts, then moving her fingers over her intimacy.

"You don't have panties .." I muttered excitedly.

She shook her head and started kissing me again.

I only stopped her long enough to lay her down. I took off those shorts of hers, and started pleasuring her with her fingers, and then added her tongue too.

I saw her take on an expression almost alien to that gesture of hers, then she liked her and she abandoned herself to the pleasure I was causing him.

She arched her back and moved on to squeeze her breasts with one hand, and started biting her lip so as not to get lost in louder moans.

She was breathing fast, lost there.

It was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen before.