UNTIL DAYLIGHT

13

13.

It kills love

because it is more sincere.

All the time on the way to the shop I kept running my fingers over my lips; I seemed to still hear Mirko's. I seemed to still feel those kisses this morning. I didn't think certain kisses could affect us so much. So much that you can still taste it.

Some kisses are like people: they mark you. They mark you so much, that you remember them, you relive them, despite all the lips you kissed previously, and the future ones, only two lips remain indelible.

I hoped he would call me!

I was really undecided this morning on that note, whether or not to write my number, maybe he didn't care since he had never asked me before! Of course, not that I had managed to get to the big question: 'Will you give me your number? '

I sighed, and this time I really wished that everything went well. On the other hand, it was he who had started all this. It was he who had tried to kiss me, and who, in the end, he succeeded because I wanted to too.

Perhaps, I would have wished for something else as well; get carried away, but it was too early!

I arrived at the shop and I noticed that Carlo was there with a blond-haired girl, sitting at the cashier talking. I closed my eyelids and took a closer look at her face before entering. I thought I had already seen it ..

"Alessia! I was waiting for you. Do you want to stand there for the whole day?" Carlo joked, then turned to her: "She's always with her head in the clouds. You'll get used to it, Milena."

"Just call me Milla. Anyway, we've already met the two of us if I'm not mistaken!" She exclaimed, looking at me seriously.

"Yeah .." Think of you, I was asking myself the same question, you know? What sarcasm ..

"Well .. Shall we start work?" Carlo joined his hands and looked at both of them: "Milla I'll show you what you have to do, and you, Alessia .. The new clothes for the season have arrived, can you fix them? Remove the ones you don't need, while in the ones that are just starting, close the entrance, put up the discount boards. "

I nodded and went to do my homework.

"Listen, Alessia .." Milla was behind me as I finished adding the discounts to the dresses. Without turning around, I waved her over to let her know that she could go on talking to me about her. Why did I feel so nervous? "Could you please explain to me how it works here?"

“Of course!” I exclaimed.

She closed her lids, watching me questioningly. "Do you also work in that b & b? We met there .." maybe she just wanted to make friends with me.

I turned to her, bit my lower lip and then I remembered!

"That's where I saw you! Anyway, it will be the first two days that you will find yourself disoriented, but Carlo is not a bad person, he will tell you where you are wrong."

A broad, friendly smile appeared on her lips. Maybe she could have been a nice colleague ..

***

My working hours were finally over by lunchtime. I ran into the dressing room and took my bag, and grabbed my cell phone. On the screen were the w******p mailboxes. I very much hoped that one of the messages was from Mirko!

She opened it and I started reading:

Agnese, Matteo, Giada, Valentina rentals, Nina.

Nina ..

I raised my head and closed my eyes; What if Nina saw Mirko come out of my window? How would I have justified myself? Oh, the day had taken a strange turn. Really, really, so weird ..

I puffed out my cheeks and then let a puff come out of my lips. I put the bag on my shoulder and walked out of the shop, greeting Carlo with a wave of my hand, in which he returned with a broad smile and a nod of the head. He was talking on the phone.

I started swiping my spotify playlist, starting the songs I had liked. I went to w******p and opened the messages:

Agnes: I have to speak to you urgently! I have the apartment, but I need a roommate. Please come with me.

Matteo: Yesterday you disappeared, you never wrote to me again. I'm sorry we didn't go out .. Do you want to go for tonight? I'll take you to a nice place ..

Giada: Listen, you and I have to see each other okay? I'm in the center on Sunday, considered busy with me !!

Valentina rentals: Hi beautiful, how are you? I just wanted to let you know that I have rented my room .. I'm sorry! If I hear anything around, I'll let you know!

Nina: I saw a handsome young man come out of your room.

I started giggling. Nothing escaped that woman!

I replied to the messages:

To Agnese: I'll let you know .. You have to tell me the price, and how the apartment is set up.

To Matteo: Okay. He tonight at 8pm.

To Giada: Sure Honey! I can not wait to see you!

I ignored Valentina's message, and immediately replied to Nina with a voice message:

"Nina, what do you say? Ahahah yes, it was Mirko, I admit it! He spent the night with me, but don't worry, all quiet!"

I kept thinking about the fact that Milla had started working in that very shop. And then I remembered Mirko and that evening at the b & b. What if she was really in love with him, and he was playing the usual asshole boy game to make her suffer?

Even though, after this morning, she didn't seem like she was lying, quite the contrary ..

"I think thinking about me too much distracts you .."

I jumped into a gasp, and found myself in front of him. He smiled at me, with a tray under his arm.

“Do you work here?” I asked, without greeting him, like this, direct.

He turned to look around the bar, then back to me, and nodded: "Yeah."

"You didn't write to me, anyway .." I murmured.

“Should I have done that?” He asked.

I got hurt. I snorted and started walking.

"Hei .. Hei .. Brake a little .." he grabbed my arm, pulling me back.

I rolled my eyes. And I, stupid, who thought it was different.

"He I know that .. I have to get away from me .." he sighed. "Sorry about this morning, I shouldn't have kissed you."

A lump in my throat seemed to choke me, and this made me react spontaneously. I slapped him in front of everyone.

"f**k you, Mirko .." I whispered.

Why does everyone think they act without thinking? Why don't people try to give weight to kisses, hugs, words spoken? Why do you never stop to think about what might be going through the other person's mind at that moment? Because. A row of questions, those whys without answering, unable to understand how they work now.

Maybe I should get used to the fact that things that go well, or that, in any case, make you feel so alive, do not always remain beautiful and untouchable, like in a crystal case. It's always the things that send us over the moon that make us feel stupid when denied.

And maybe I should learn from myself to love and, above all, not to trust anymore.