The Secrets of Agata

Chapter 6

I found father in the house study with an elder, they both looked at me with puzzled looks as I was entering through the doorway. "Father, I've been looking for you. I would like to help prepare the services for mother . Where are you with the preparations?"

Father stood with open arms reaching for me as he walked closer, "Tora, Cecilia would have loved for you to be a part of this. Please, come, we can discuss." He turned and bowed as the elder walked away. I believe his name is Michael, he put a hand on my shoulder as he passed and gave a nod. The feeling coming from that nod was something I have never felt before, it was oddly reassuring. I shake out of my daze as I continue on with father about the ceremony.

"Tora, here is what I have planned so far." He says sliding a notebook in my direction. I take the paper and read silently as he begins to pull another notebook from the desk. On the list he has several items already; the elders will pray during the ceremony, flowers need to be picked out, no casket as she will be cremated, the full moon being on the fifth of next month and after the ceremony itself there will be a meal shared with the community.

I set aside the paper and look to father, "What type of flowers are we thinking? What type of food and who will prepare it? Why do we have to wait for the full moon, because it seems as if it'll be two weeks from now?" "Darling, there is still an investigation going on, after they do the autopsy and finalize the paperwork we will have her body back on the fourth. This is the day we shall praise her body here on earth and the following day we will spread her ashes in the river to return her to the mother. Our ceremony will thankfully be during the full moon when the mother is said to roam for the lost." Puzzled, I begin to think about everything that has happened in the last few days. "Father, these ceremonies, is it the same as what you haven't told me yet? Will I learn more about what all of this means before then?" "Yes, my sweet child. I will teach you what you need to know, however it will come as a shock to you. You must prepare for your world to change because when you learn all of the secrets of your past there will be no going back, so please, rest while you can, before you know it, there will be no time for that. Now, let's go take a look at the flowers, come." He demanded. "We will go together and later we will talk more."

We walked to the garage and found father's truck waiting to be driven. I jumped into the passenger seat while father glides perfectly into the seat. I wish I would have gotten his height. Mother was almost as.tall as him so I'm not sure why I'm so short but I guess not everyone should be able to reach the sky, chuckling to myself. We drive in silence to the inner city, I'm taking in all of the scenery because I don't get to come that often. So much has changed, even though it's as beautiful as ever. I love watching the streams turn into rivers and dirt roads turn into concrete. We only drive about forty minutes before we arrive right outside the mainland, I can even see the castle from here, it's simply breathtaking. Father looks my way as he turns the key off and slides out. I follow his lead and get out of the truck to go in. He asked if I had any ideas or something specific I wanted her to have. I can picture what I think she would have loved but I'm not so sure they are in season.

The flower shop is bigger than it looks from the outside, we walk in to see the most amazing sight. Fresh flowers, vines, greenery and anything else you could imagine from wall to wall. There are coolers full of different varieties of everything. It's amazing, seeing now I can choose anything, it's a bit overwhelming. "Father, do you have any requests?" Taking everything in, I don't even look towards him. "No sweet girl. I want you to pick out everything. I'm not really good at this stuff and I know you watched her and know her favorites, it would be an honor to allow you this." All I can do is smile, this is amazing. "I'm going to drop off a check to the front desk, it's already signed so please don't hesitate, pick anything and everything you want. No amount is too large." He kisses my head as he walks towards the counter and then disappears to the other end of the building.

Perfect, I spent the next hour picking flowers out for her arrangements for the viewing, red roses and sunflowers were her favorites. I talked to the women working and we've all decided it would be beautiful to make fresh arrangements to set on the posts next to where she will lie. She will have extra sunflowers and roses to place all around her, they said this was traditional for our community. Everyone here has been so nice and thoughtful. They are helping me in more ways than just flowers, this has been keeping my mind off of things. Finishing it some final thoughts and ideas I leave them in charge with the rest. I return to the truck to find father just returning as well.

"I'm assuming all went well?" He asked. Smiling " of course, everyone here is so nice and thoughtful, it went perfectly, I just know she will love it all." "If you picked it, I know she would have loved it." Kissing my head, "Tom called, he said if you are ready the cleaning team got the house ready and we can go back if you want. If not, we can stay at the pack house for a few more days." "Father, I don't know. I miss my bed and my room, but I'm not sure I'm ready yet" my eyes begin to fight the tears begging to stream down my cheeks. "It's OK baby. Let's get back to the pack house and we will decide tomorrow. Nothing has to be a rush, dinner will be ready in about two hours, if we get going now, we should be there in enough time you can shower before, so why don't you just lay back and rest a bit while I drive us." "Ok, dinner sounds good." I say as I lay back in the seat. I prop my feet up out the window and let the summer sun warm up my toes. I feel sleep pulling me in as the road begins to smooth under the wheels.

Arriving back at the pack house, even though I have no idea what a pack is, I feel surprisingly rested. Father nods to me as I rush to get upstairs to take a hot shower before dinner. "Tora, there is a dress in your closet, once you're ready, you should wear it down to dinner." He yelled as I was making my way into the house. I have a new dress, I think to myself walking the halls. I wonder why he got me this. I figured I'd need something for mother's ceremonies but not just for dinner. I quickly rush up the stairs, I see Sam waiting in the hall for me. "Hey Tora! I just wanted you to know we moved your room. Now you have your own bathroom." She smiled softly as she took my hands. "No one had to do that, but thank you." "It's really no problem Tora, you are a special person and I know you can't understand it right now, but things are going to change and we want to make sure you are taken care of. Listen, we will talk more about this later but for now go get cleaned up and I'll see you at dinner." She pulled me in for a hug and rushed down the steps before I could say anything else.

I turn to walk into the bedroom they've moved me and I can not believe what I'm seeing. Everything is so beautiful. There is a huge canopy bed made from dark cherry wood, the walls are the prettiest shade of green that matches the trees leaves. The floor is a beautiful hardwood that accommodates the bed well. It's simply breathtaking. The dressers and nightstands match the bed, I can not believe it. I walk into the closet to find my new dress, its pastel blue with subtle flowers. It clasps around the neck but still manages to cover my whole back. It's simply beautiful. I wonder what made father get this for me. I rush to take a shower because I can't wait to try it on. My hair is still fresh from this morning so I pin it up and hip it to freshen the rest of my body. Letting the suds take away my sorrows and release the tension in my muscles, I quickly rinse and hop out.

I towel dry myself off and head straight to the closet and pull the dress over my head and straighten it over my curves. This is beautiful, I have to find shoes. I look at the bed and to my surprise a beige set of heels sit waiting for me to put them on. I rush over and slide them on and they fit like a gem! These are perfect just like I imagined. I look at the clock and notice I need to hurry, dinner will be served in about twenty minutes and I need to finish my hair and touch up my makeup.

I'm practically running to the bathroom, I put on a little bit of mascara and a light lipstick. The lipstick is very neutral and matches my lip color almost to a tee. I take my hair down and freshen up with some dry shampoo. I take one last look in the mirror and I'm just floored. I look almost like a princess. Feeling like a hundred bucks I guess I need to make my way down stairs. I think I can smell the food from here, the monster in my stomach agrees as he plays the song of his people. I start walking towards the bathroom door when I hear a knock. Glancing in the direction it came from, it hits me, my whole body is starting to tingle and I feel warm, stopping me dead in my tracks, I stop breathing and listen for the person behind the door. No one should be knocking on my door, I didn’t think anyone else would be up here. That’s strange, I think I can feel a heartbeat. My palms are sweating and

I smell pine. What is happening to me, this is strange, out of everything that’s been happening this has to be the weirdest. Everything just stops. Abruptly, I feel cold, I’m no longer sweating, and I can breathe again, but now I feel empty. The smell is gone but this lingering feeling of wholeness is hurting, I don’t know how to describe this.

I swing open the door hoping whoever knocked is still there, feeling a bit distrubed, no one is there. I know I heard knocking, there is no way I made that up in my head. I may be going through alot but I know for a fact someone knocked on this door. I close the door behind me and decide to continue down to dinner. I don't want to be late and keep everyone waiting. Maybe whoever it was will let me know they stopped by or it could be they didn’t know my room was changed. It could have been anything really, I’m just going to enjoy my dinner and hope for the best outcome for the evening. Something in my core is telling me this dinner is more than just a meal, it's more, but I can’t put my finger on the why yet. Maybe father, or even Sam or Ivy might have some answers, assuming they will be here.

I begin walking down the stairs towards the kitchen, trying not to run but definitely keeping a steady pace not to be late. I almost reach the doorway when I hear rumbles of conversation. “That’s a lot of people, why are there so many?” I say quietly to myself, maybe this is one of those ceremony things where people get together and remember the dead. I shutter just thinking of the word, the dead, it sounds so inconsiderate but it's just the honest truth. It’s not meant to be rude, even though it really is. Tingles rush down my arm as I walk into the kitchen, I still can't figure out why but I can smell the pine again. I didn't realize that pine smells absolutely amazing. It smells like a place to call home, we didn’t even have any pine smells at home, but this, this is different. I can’t explain it. “Azalea, hey!” I think in my head, trying to get the attention of my wolf friend. “Is this a part of that stuff I can’t know about yet?” “Yes, it is love, but I can not come forward right now, we will talk later. Enjoy your dinner and don't worry about it. It will pass.” Well, that's just great, I'm not crazy, but they still won't explain it to me. This is ridiculous. Why do they keep doing this to me? I'm going to find a place to sit. I'm not worrying about this right now, I’m going to enjoy my dinner with my dad and friends, and everyone else I can hear talking.

I waltz right into the kitchen, not really being quiet but not making myself known either, his eyes. I almost walked right into that island. I almost had to pick my jaw off the ground. His eyes are beautiful. There are glittering specs of amber in a green pool of hazel. Who is this? Why haven't I met him before, and why in the hell am I so freaking tingly! Was he the one at my door, I have to look at my feet to try and gain control of the situation but he’s gone. Even the tingles and the scent is gone. I can only think he is the reason behind it, I don't even know who he is, but something tells me I need to.

I finally get straightened out and compose myself when I’m bombarded, Sam and Ivy are immediately by my side and they know something is going on. “Tora, what is wrong with you? Why are you so pale?” Sam said “ Tora, Sam’s right, something is going on, so spill, we need details, what’s happened.” “Easy, easy, guys, hang on, one thing at a time. Let me start from the beginning.” I try to say, before we were interrupted by father making an announcement.

“Friends and family, thank you all for joining us. I know this is very short notice but I hope everyone enjoys the meal. Today we made the final arrangements for my dear Ceclia. This has been a difficult time for myself as my partner for life is gone. I will get through this because of you, so here we raise our glass for my wife and enjoy an amazing meal together. Also, don’t forget to say hi to Tora” he says pointing in my direction, “She is excited to be here tonight and thanks you as well for being here. Now, let's eat!” He ended his speech as everyone began to clap and move towards the food tables. Sam and Ivy start right back up where we left off.

“Tora, tell us now! What happened to you?” “Let’s grab some food and we will talk as we eat, i'm starving and really I don't know how to explain it” shrugging my shoulders as we walk to the food table.

We are finally getting to our seats with our food. Tonight we had grilled chicken, build your own salads, and corn on the cob. The desert table looked pretty too but I'm not much on sweets right now. As soon as we get set down Ivy kicks me under the table. “Spill it, something is going on and you need to tell us.” “Ok, ok, listen, everything that is going on right now is hard anyways, so when i tell you this, I swear I'm not crazy just listen ok?” “Fine! Just tell us!” They both yell in unison. I continue on about the knock on the door, the feeling of warmth and the smell that randomly hit me. I even told them but feeling the heartbeat. When I was finishing up with the major issues, I began talking about the guy I saw as I walked into the kitchen earlier. I explained that I had never seen him before and when we locked eyes, I felt everything and then nothing at all.

The two of them just looked at each other with wide eyes. They won't make eye contact with me but keep looking at their plates and back to each other. It was almost like they were having a conversation without the words. Sam finally looked at me with the expression of worry, “Tora, that was your..” Sam started to say, “Don’t finish that sentence Samantha.” It was my dad, he stopped her from telling me something he obviously didn't want me to know. I growled in response. Wait, did I really just growl? "What's happening to me?" Tears begin to pool in my eyes just trying to make sense of everything. I looked towards father and then at Sam and Ivy. No one is saying anything, they won't even look at me, all the while the whole dining hall is staring. Tom makes his way towards us and whispers in my dad's ear, I thought I could hear it but it must be my mind playing tricks again. "I'm sorry, I need to go." Turning around, my head down, I make my way towards the hall and up the stairs to the room I call mine now. No one wants to answer any of my questions or allow me to learn anything. I know something is going on, something is wrong with me.

The only thing I can even think of doing right now is slinging myself on this beautiful bed and ignoring the world. Why did I growl just then? “Am I a wolf?” I ask myself out loud laughing. That is probably the most ridiculous thing I have ever said. This isn’t a book, this is real life, things like that aren’t real. Right? “Ugh,” sighing out to myself again. None of that could be real, could it? No, there is no way any of that could be real. Flipping and flopping around on the bed like a fish out of water, I'm finally comfortable enough to just lay here and stare at the ceiling. I can feel sleep take over my tired mind and body. I need this, I allow it to take over me, into a dreamless sleep.