Impregnant by not my Husband

HESTIA's Point of View "HESTIA, listen to me." I closed my eyes in annoyance as I completely avoided Rush. Here he is again. He is asking for my time and I can't give it to him. Why? Because first and foremost, I am busy. The reason why I am here in this country is not to reconcile with him. Second, I am married. It is sacred and holy. It is not good in the eyes of anyone that he is clinging to me. And lastly, I can't reciprocate his feelings boldly. Yes, I do love him but that was it. I can't leave my husband even if it is just an arranged marriage. Rush found out that the reason why I am married to Wren was just an arranged marriage and here is he again to offer something I can't do. And that is… to run away with him to be a sinner. "Sorry, I am in a hurry." I apologized and tried my best to avoid him. "You can't escape all the time, Hestia. Do you know that? I know you have feelings for me. I know that you love me. Can't we just be free?" Annoyed, I stopped walking and looked at him. "Free? Do you even hear yourself, Rush?" "Why? Did I say something wrong? Don't you love me, Hestia?" I didn't answer him. Instead, I took a deep breath and started to walk away from him again. As expected, he chased me. Yes, he is right. I have feelings for him, even before we first met. But I need to forget those wrong feelings because I am already married and it is never right to love someone if I already have one. I can't be a sinner for him. God knows how much I wanted to be with Rush but that can't be. There's no reason for me to leave my husband. I have been cheating on Wren emotionally since then. I don't love my husband and I know that's already a sin. But what can I do? I love Rush. "I know something about your husband." I stopped walking when I heard Rush's voice behind me. I heard him stop walking the moment I stopped. And when I faced him since he got my interest, I saw frustrations in his eyes. "If you are here to ruin my husband's image for your sake, back off, Rush. Let's just accept the fact that we can't be together." Of course, I said that with no emotions but deep inside, I wanted to hug him. I want to go with him. I want to escape the world with him. But he didn't answer me. Instead, he gave me a video tape recorder. Curious, I took it from his hands. "W-What is this?" I couldn't stop stuttering. Suddenly, I was nervous for some unknown reason. "Take a look at it and you'll know who's the real cheater. After that, you should decide whether you stay with your marriage or run away with me." I took a deep breath. Something is telling me to look at the contents of that video but something is also preventing me from doing so. Nevertheless, I asked him. "Will you stay away from me after this?" It hurts my heart that he nodded and agreed to stay away from me. But before he finally left, he left some words that made my heart beat faster. "You'll stay with me, Hestia. Mark my words." For several minutes I just stood in the place where Rush left me. I thanked him for giving me peace. And that's when I decided to open the video recorder and play what's inside. My body shivered as I looked at a video recorder where I clearly saw my husband kissing another woman who isn't familiar with me… All this time, he is cheating. I don't know how I will feel. I was shaking because I couldn't believe it. But why don't I feel any pain? Why am I not hurt? INSTEAD of going to the company, I went straight to the bar after I watched the video where I saw how my husband cheated. I am not here to waste my life, but to rewrite my destiny. Honestly, I didn't feel any pain when I saw the video. In fact, I suddenly thought about Rush and his offer. Will we be free? But when and how? How can I confront my husband? How can I tell him that I know about his betrayal? And when he finds out that I know, what's next? Will he let me go? If I file for divorce, what will happen to our parents? To our family reputations? That's what I've been thinking since I stepped foot in this place. And when I think about it, I don't know how long I've been drinking. I don't know how many bottles of wine I've consumed. I need to think. But no matter what I think, only one thing always comes to my mind... and that is Rush's offer. When I put my glass down on the counter bar where I was, I almost fainted when I saw Rush in front of me. I frowned and then seemed to run out of hope to be alone. "What are you doing here, Rush?” I asked him. “You seem drunk. Let's go. I'll send you to your hotel room." I smirked. "And who are you to do that?" I saw how Rush took a deep breath as if he was extending his patience with me. "Why are you drinking? Are you hurt because your husband cheated on you?" "Who says I am hurt?" "Then stop acting like you are." He bit his lower lip to calm himself. "Come on, Hestia. Start a new life with me." I shook my head after drinking the wine. "What you want to happen is not that easy. I am married to him. What will our families say if I go with you? Rush, what you want to happen is difficult.” "The only thing you two have is an arranged marriage. You don't love him, Hestia. Why do you insist on making your relationship work? He's cheating on you." I raised my eyebrows. "You don't know everything, Rush. We need to save our family's reputation. And running away with you can add to the fuel. You're not gonna save us. You're not gonna save me." I looked around. Suddenly, I started to care about my surroundings. Rush seems to get what I mean. "Come on, let's talk somewhere else." "No!" I firmly disagreed. "I can stay so you should leave me here." "Do you think I can leave you?" I took a deep breath, running out of patience. "Rush, don't be naughty." “I will only leave if you come with me. Let's go. Stop being stubborn, Hestia." Suddenly, he took out some cash and violently dropped it on my table. And I couldn't do anything when he held my hand tightly and forcibly pulled me out of that place. I was just surprised when we got to the parking area. He only stopped pulling me when he violently put me in his car. He also followed inside. He is sitting in the driver's seat while I am in the shotgun. "What are we doing here? Rush, someone might see us." Swear to God, this is hilarious! "This is the safest place I know. Be grateful that I didn't send you to your hotel room if you are thinking about your so-called reputation." I breathed deeply. I don't know if this is the effect of the tequila I drank but I am being emotional right now. I feel sorry for Rush but I know that's not how he wants me to feel about him. "Hestia…" The way he calls my name... I felt his sincerity. And I'm sad because he's hurting because of me. I wanted to run away with him but I know that the law will chase us. "Rush, it will never be okay. I am still married. In the eyes of the people, in the eyes of God. I am still tied." I couldn't stop myself from crying. "I know." He wiped the tears that flowed down my cheeks. "And I think I am not the perfect woman for you. I don't want you to be a sinner for loving me. You don't deserve that kind of love, Rush. You deserve someone else." It pains me to say that. I want him. I love him. And I want him for the rest of my life. But I can't be with him. Every time I think about escaping this world, reality slaps me and brings me back to the reality that I'm married to Wren and Rush and I can't be together. "But all I want is you, Hestia. I can be a sinner or whatever they call me. We can live together. Buy a house together. Grow with each other. And have a family in the future. I am building my future with you, Hestia. And I want is your yes and I can handle the rest. Only if you trust me." How I love to hear his voice saying that… "But—" I didn't finish what I was going to say when Rush suddenly grabbed both of my cheeks and pressed a violent kiss to my lips. I slowly closed my eyes. Accepting the kiss he gave me. And I responded wholeheartedly. Suddenly, my world became magical. His kisses bring me to a worldly feeling. It's like all my worries have disappeared. He removes the doubts from my heart. My heart became peaceful for a couple of minutes. And we voluntarily stopped for unknown reasons. Tears welled up in my eyes again as we stared at each other. I witnessed his eyes begging and asking me to be with him... "I'll just ruin your life, Rush..." I worriedly said. "Ruin me, then." And after he said that, I nodded wholeheartedly. That was the signal for Rush to press the button on the car to raise the windows to cover us. As soon as we claimed our lips together, Rush gradually lowered the back of our chair. And yes, for the second time, I gave myself to him.