Love Handles

Tessa Andrews could be considered rather ordinary. She grew up in a small town in the south east of England, always did okay in school, had a decent sprinkling of friends, and considered herself fun to be around. But it was her romantic life that she struggled with. This was because Tessa was a larger woman. She had always been bigger, ever since she was a young girl. And the world loves to punish bigger girls. She’d suffered every type of bullying you can imagine, been called all sorts of names, been hit and kicked, had her things stolen, the lot. These things tend to leave a mark on a person, and not always marks you can see. Tessa had no confidence, and her self esteem was at rock bottom. She couldn’t think of a time where she had ever had any love for herself. And as her mother always told her, if she didn’t love herself, how could she expect a man to? When she was in school, she had watched the boys fawn over her best friend Kelly. Everyone loved Kelly. Kelly was thin and beautiful, with long, curly blonde hair. That was what boys were interested in. They didn’t care if you were funny, or smart, or had good taste in music. All they cared about was whether or not you were thin and pretty. And Tessa was neither of those things. She’d never been either of those things, and she never would be. Of course, Tessa had had boyfriends. As she got older and left school, went to university, moved to London, men became interested. But she could never quite get over the idea that they saw her as a kink, or a quirk. Or like they were doing her a favour by being with her. Even if it wasn’t true, Tessa couldn’t help but feel that way. The last one to pay Tessa any attention was a rather beastly man by the name of Luke Telme. He had been sweet in the beginning, but as time went on he showed his true colours. He was only interested in one thing, and after he got it, he made it his mission to make Tessa feel as small as possible. “Maybe you shouldn’t eat that.” “Your stomach rolls are so visible in that top.” “You set my anxiety off when you text me about your complaints.” (The only thing Tessa had ever complained about was Luke abandoning her whenever she actually needed him.) One particular day, after Luke had made a rather nasty comment again (“I couldn’t imagine marrying you, ya know. You’re too wobbly. I need someone who can fit into my world.”) Tessa decided she had had enough. She knew she would never fit into Luke’s world, he didn’t see her as worthy of him, and by extension she didn’t see herself as worthy either. So she quietly got her things together and left Luke’s flat, dropping the key through the letter box. She never looked back, or at least she tried not to. That’s the thing, when you are viewed as the one who is less than, when you’re also the one who walks away, the other tends to want to know what happened. Luke never seemed to get over Tessa’s ultimate betrayal of leaving. He would send vicious texts, one after another. Tessa ended up having to block his number, and thankfully that ended things properly. She hadn’t seen him since. Tessa knew she’d never fit into Luke’s world. He was a big shot accountant for one of the biggest companies operating in London, Hyde Industries. He was always rubbing elbows with London’s elite, and she just didn’t fit in. He had taken her to precisely one social function, had declared her an embarrassment and refused to take her again. This added to her self esteem issues. But she was free from him now. Free to attempt to find happiness. Right this second she was sat in the waiting area of a prestigious company’s head office. She had an interview for an administration position, the secretary for the one and only Henry Cooke, owner of C-Corp, and fierce rival of Hyde Industries. That was the only reason she had taken the interview. Because it was in direct competition to Luke. ‘He Who Must Not Be Named’, Tessa silently scolded herself in her head. In the waiting room were numerous women, blondes, brunettes, red heads, all waiting to be called into Henry Cooke’s office. All of them gorgeous. Tessa knew how it worked. Henry Cooke was a wealthy man. Men of his calibre usually opted for the eye candy, not the one who could actually do the job the best. She already knew this based on the fact that there were no men interviewing for this position, and every other woman here was thin and beautiful. These women were the Kelly’s of the world. Dressed in designer skirts and blazers, hair perfectly twisted into perfect buns, nails beautifully manicured. At this point, Tessa deeply regretted applying for the job in the first place. She pulled her phone out of her bag. Tessa “Why did I do this to myself?” Kelly “I told you you’d regret it. It’s not exactly your scene is it?” Tessa “I wish you were here. I should have listened to you when you tried to talk me out of this.” Kelly “Well you didn’t, and now you have to go through with this. You’re gonna get through this. Go to the bathroom, touch up your lipstick, and take some deep breaths. The worst that could happen is you don’t get the job. Text me when you’re headed home.” Tessa “Okay, thanks Kel” ‘Kelly, always the voice of reason’, Tessa thought. She put her phone back in her back, got up from her seat as gracefully as a larger woman could, and went over to the receptionist. “Where are your bathrooms?” “Through those double doors on the right” Tessa went through the double doors and into the bathroom. Taking a quick look around to check she was alone, she sighed and leaned her forehead on the large, expensive mirror. “What are you doing here, you imbecile”. Imposter syndrome had well and truly sunk in. She touched up her lipstick as she’d been instructed to do, took some deep breaths and made her way back to the corridor. Before she could get back through the double doors leading to the reception and the waiting area however, another door to the left opened, and a small blonde woman walked out and straight into Tessa. Being larger, you’d think Tessa would be a little more solid on her feet, but she wasn’t, and instead landed flat on her ass. The woman gasped and then giggled at her as a man followed her out of the room she had just exited from. And this wasn’t just any man, this was quite possibly the most handsome man Tessa had ever laid eyes on. His chisled abs could be seen through the pressed, white shirt he was wearing, his muscles straining through the fabric. He had a beautiful tan, dimples, perfect white teeth, beautifully styled dark curly hair, and gloriously glinting green eyes. He was an Adonis. “I’m so sorry, are you ok?” Giggled the woman. “I’m fine, don’t worry about it” Tessa replied, gathering herself to stand. The Adonis held out his hand to help her, but Tessa ignored it, not wanting him to have to pull any of her weight up “I’m fine, really, thank you.” The Adonis nodded politely, and ushered both Tessa and the other woman through the double doors. Tessa could not feel any more embarrassed at this moment as she returned to her seat, that was until the Adonis spoke from the receptionists desk. “Tessa Andrews?” Inwardly cursing herself, realising she’d just made a fool of herself in front of, not just a Greek God, but the interviewer, Tessa wondered if the ground could swallow her up now. Standing as gracefully as she could, she held a hand up to signify that she was, in fact, Tessa Andrews. The man gave a vague nod and motioned her to follow him. Tessa followed the Adonis back through the double doors and into the room he had just vacated.the room was large, and almost sterile. Every piece of furniture was black leather or glass, and there was no smell. It didn’t smell old, or new, or clean. It smelled of nothing, which Tessa found bizarre. The man took a seat behind a glass desk and indicated the seat opposite him, which Tessa took. The seat was uncomfortable and small, the arms digging into her legs. The man seemed to notice her bulging thighs, as his eyes seemed to linger on them a beat longer than Tessa deemed appropriate. She waited for the man to start the interview. “So, Miss Andrews, I’m Henry Cooke, CEO of C-Corp. What made you apply for the position of my secretary?”