Alert
1074 Words
I awake to a nurse putting drops in my eyes, it is so bright, I am not sure this is still the ICU.
"Good morning sir", the nurse says, I try and bring my eyes into focus to at least look in the direction of the voice. " I have spray for that throat of yours, see if we can get you talking and eating today, can you open wide for me please sir?" I open my mouth as far as I can get it, but it hurts, maybe I have a broken jaw.
" Thank you sir, this my sting, I will mark your chart for the doc to check your x-ray results on your jaw, that was a nasty crash sir, but your in good hands here, by the way welcome to your new room." So I am out of ICU I guess this means healing is occurring, slowly but healing is good.
" Please try and say ah, let's see if the spray worked" AAAHHH... not a peep just the sting she told me about. " Relax and take your time sir" AAHH...AAHH..AAHH... Damn still no peep. " would you like me to spray again sir?" I do a head nod, "Ok sir, open wide."
It takes roughly what feels like a hour and who knows how many sprays and swallows, it no longer stings and feels numb but " A..A..H..HH" it's rough, doesn't sound like my own voice, but head way.
" I'm going to move the bed, to see if you can sit a little for a drink of water", I nod she replies "Please try and talk, I know it may be hard and slow at first but the more you use it, the better it will be" I feel like I am smiling as I have a bit of a dirty mind right now, but I mange to get out " OOO...KKK".
"That's better, I have questions I need to ask, so we need to keep at this, I am your nurse for the whole day, I'm Florence, here's some water, try and take a sip" I feel like toddler drinking from a straw for the first time, " nice and easy, Mr Moose" I swallow, my throat still numb from the spray but it is refreshing, I want to drink more and faster as that big wave of thirst has hit, " slow down sir, nice and easy, I know speed is your thing but caring for others is mine, so work with me here, slow, steady so you heal fully, not quick and improperly with on going issues."
Florence has a very valid point, I slow down and mange to drink a whole cup of water, " There you go, slow but steady head way, maybe we can try some food before the end of the day."
Food that would be nice I do feel like I am starving, how about a nice steak, or burger? My luck they have me on baby food, or some thing mashed, better just smile and do my best to get talking.
I seem to be staying more awake, she has been checking my range of motion and watching my face to see pain response, " The doc cut back your pain meds so we can gage how your doing, and to see if we can keep you awake a little" she says breaking the silence, I noticed the radio wasn't on but when I get my voice stronger I will ask for tunes."
I mange to stay awake a little longer then I have since coming out of the coma, I was able to say ok and hi, working towards yes and my name to answer the questions the staff needs to help in my recovery, much like racing it is a team effort, every one has a job to do for achieving the goal, in this case, the goal is health.
A full half day awake, I'd say head way, but I did end up taking a 2 hour nap around lunch time, when I woke back up, there was dad talking with nurse Florence.
"Looking much better today, heard you have been more awake" yup however the word didn't come out of my mouth, Damn it, any other coma patients feel like this, impatient and frustrated, never thought in my quest to stand out and break some records that I would find myself here wanting, almost needing to be normal, or at least my normal.
"Florence is saying this afternoon you have more tests, said I can only stay for a little while as the team will be in here shortly to check reflexes and all that, so I may swing by the race team and give the shop crew a update and maybe work out timing for visits, if that's ok with you?" a long pause as I try and speak, my mouth so dry again, dad holds a cup of water up for me and moves the straw to my lips, I drink slow but steady, the whole cup, then try and speak again, this time "ok" does come out clear and less shaky.
"That a boy, you have always had determination, you set your mind to it and achieve it, proud of you son, don't know if I tell you enough, but I am very proud of you and love you so much, when your mom was nearing her last days, every time she was awake I told her, she started to say I know, me too, I almost lost you and wasn't sure I told you enough or showed you enough so, son I love you and I am proud of you and here for you."
I feel like I have some tears in my eyes, it was really good to hear it, that and the memories of mom and in the coma her words of I love echoed and gave me some pretty peaceful moments, please let this work, let the words come out clear " thanks dad" yes, wasn't loud but I did say it, let me be on a roll, "love you" a win, dad kisses my forehead like when I was a little boy at bedtime, "Take good care of my boy Florence, he's all yours, getting out of your way".
"Oh Jonathan I will swing by tonight before visiting hours are over, be good for the nurses." I feel myself grin and think to myself I will, on with the myriad of tests.
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