heartache
The pond glistened next to her. Justine sat on the bench, watching and waiting, totally unaware of her surroundings. It was as if she could turn back the hands of time and just restart. If only life had a restart button, it would fix everything. She could hear the chirping of birds and the rustling of leaves as the wind blew, cooling the salty trail of tears on her cheeks.
Her heart was shattered into a million pieces. She did not know whether she would ever be able to carry on. She had lost the love of her life in a motorbike accident. Greg had been her high school sweetheart; their love was like something out of a movie.
Justine awoke to a loud thud. Her cat, Jeremiah, had knocked over a book while rolling around on her desk. Purring madly, he rubbed his nose against her cheek as if to say, "I'm sorry for waking you up." For a brief moment, she was happy and almost smiled. The realization of truth returned when she looked down at her bedside table and saw Greg’s photo. His blonde hair and blue eyes were piercing and inviting. She picked Jeremiah up and held him tight, giving him a kiss on his nose.
Just then, the phone rang. It was her best friend, Gale. Gale had been checking up on Justine periodically; she had been there through everything. She was the one person Justine had called while waiting in the hospital emergency room. Their friendship was the kind where they could sit in silence for an hour and still feel as though they’d had a heartfelt conversation. Their hearts knew each other too well; they were sisters, just not by blood.
"Get dressed; I’m coming to fetch you," Gale said.
Fifteen minutes later, the doorbell rang. There stood Gale, her long, luscious red hair flowing down her perfectly formed physique. She had never struggled to find a man, just never the right one. She had been in and out of relationships throughout the years and couldn't quite relate to what Justine was feeling. Gale was all too happy to be by herself—not quite a loner, but not needy for a relationship.
After a short drive, Gale pulled into the café’s parking lot. "Let's go get our coffee on," she said. While coffee sounded good, Justine had not allowed herself anything "good" lately. She felt like she didn't deserve it, as if having fun or enjoying herself would be a betrayal of Greg's memory. Greg had been the only man she had ever truly known, felt, and let in.
She sat at the table, lost in thought. Gale ordered a skinny cappuccino and a slice of lemon meringue—her absolute favorite. Justine contemplated ordering the chocolate mousse but ended up ordering a bran muffin and rooibos tea. Looking up from the menu, Justine sighed. When would life feel normal again? When would she be able to take in the beauty of a sunny day or the joy of the sun on her face? Would it be in one day, or fifty? Everyone seemed to have a different answer.
Magazine articles outlined the different stages of grief, but Justine couldn’t identify with any of them. It was as though she was stuck in another dimension, or a nightmare waiting for an alarm clock to screech and wake her up. Gale was talking up a storm, trying to take Justine’s mind off things. A few moments later, the waiter brought the tea and the cappuccino. Taking a sip, Gale scooted over on the leather sofa.
"Ooh, he's cute. You should ask for his number," Gale whispered.
Damian had worked at the café as a waiter for a few weeks. He went totally unnoticed, as he wasn't the type to seek attention. He seemed the very definition of an introvert; he kept to himself, did his job, and spoke as little as possible without being rude.
"One lemon meringue and one bran muffin coming up," he said, gesturing toward them as he set the plates down.
His eyes were warm and encouraging. Justine faked a smile. Gale took the opportunity to ask, "So, Damian, I don't see a ring on your finger. Are you single?"
Damian’s face went bright red. Anyone could see he felt uncomfortable. "Umm... yes, I am," he answered.
"Great!" she exclaimed, totally unfazed by his lack of enthusiasm. "I'm throwing a party next Friday. I’d love to have you over."
"Yeah, sure, that would be awesome."
"Send me your number and we can get the details sorted," Gale said.
He smiled. Justine sank into her seat; she knew Gale was setting her up. The coffee date was a bit one-sided, but Gale was oblivious and kept talking and talking. It felt like she would never run out of things to say. Eventually, Gale received a call and left the booth for a bit of privacy. Justine nibbled on her muffin, not really feeling hungry.
A few moments later, Gale reappeared and hastily asked for the bill. She paid, and they left the café. The ride home provided the quiet time Justine had wished for. Staring out the window, she felt empty as her mind began to wander.
